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Could this be parental alienation?

girlmeetsworld714's picture

I'm not sure what to think here and just want to hear other people's opinions; maybe some of you have dealt with this or something similar before. BM has been withholding SD3 from SO for a year and a half now. He has had major financial issues because of BM illegally taking his money (his lawyer JUST got all that sorted out) and was not able to afford a lawyer until just a few months ago (currently in the beginning stages of what I imagine will be a very drawn out custody battle). BM has told everyone that SO does not care about SD and that he has made no effort in the past almost 2 years to see her (not true). She tells everyone he is a drug addict and that he was emotionally and verbally abusive to her and cares about no one but himself (all also not true). She says that SD was always terrified to go to daddy's house (even though whenever I saw them together, SD would scream "DADDYYYY!!" and jump and squeal for him whenever he walked into the room). She keeps saying that she won't lie to SD about what's happening and SD will always know the "age appropriate truth." If what she says to everyone else is what BM thinks in her mind to be the truth, isn't she lying to SD about SO, then? Is this parental alienation even though she's only 3 years old?

Patsy's picture

PAS can start at any time. It is very possible this is going on. Get help with this fast it only gets worse. The best book to understand PAS is Divorce Poison. Learn what you can about it. At 3 you might have a chance fighting it.

Anon2009's picture

Is it alienation? Yes it is. It most certainly is. SO needs to document all of her antics. He needs to research fathers rights in Pennsylvania and find a good attorney who will get him a fair deal. Knowledge is power.

"Divorce Poison" is awesome, as is this dvd for kids called "Welcome Back Pluto." It helps the kids realize what is fact and what is fiction.

There are some great books for little kids to help them deal with divorce and separate homes. Here are some suggestions for SO and SD:

http://www.amazon.com/Dinosaurs-Divorce-Guide-Changing-Families/dp/03161...

http://www.amazon.com/Your-Fault-Koko-Bear-Read-Together/dp/0916773477/r...

http://www.amazon.com/Two-Homes-Claire-Masurel/dp/0763619841/ref=pd_bxgy...

http://www.amazon.com/Was-Chocolate-Pudding-Little-Divorce/dp/1591473098...

Rags's picture

It certainly contains elements of PAS. My layman's understanding of PAS is that the primary characteristic is poisoning the child against the other parent. This seems more like Divorce Related Malicious Mother Syndrome (DRMMS) which can progress to the criminal level in extreme cases. DRMMS is a more comprehensive effort to destroy the other parent. It is also known a DRMFS if the father is the toxic idiot.

Here is some information on DRMMS:

http://www.fact.on.ca/Info/pas/turkat95.htm