Here's the story. BF married his psycho college girlfriend. A total mean person whom everyone told him NOT to deal with 20 years ago. She already had a baby from another athlete and was chasing him (another former athlete) before the baby was even 1. I've known BF all my life and actually dissed him because of her back then because I am not a groupie like her and I had no time to go back and forth with groupies like her who obviously think they will get an athlete's wife's life. Fast forward 15 years and he and I run into eachother. No athlete's life, regular working folks - he lost his job, she lost her mind. I hesitated even talking to him until his family, friend, you name it kept telling me that he was in a really bad relationship and she is actually known for being a serious b*tch.

They have 4 kids, the idiot adopted the eldest at 14 years old. They did it the sneaky way and put an ad in a neighborhood paper knowing full well that the father (who was in the military) would never see it. She claimed she could not find him, HELLO he is in the military!!! I found him on FB in 2 seconds. I even think that she was and probably still is getting child support for that child from her BIOF. All her idea.

The stories obviously point out that she is psycho. She would go to hotels once a month for years so she could 'get away from the kid's, whom he took care of. Hello I think she was having affairs, who does that? He took his daughters to the doctors for UTI, isn't that a moms job? Her mother died and with that she lost her babysitter and her cook. Grandmother and dad took care of everything and when she passed all hell broke loose cuz STBEX had to actually parent.

She was raised with many foster kids in public housing development who evidently served as her maids (her mama was working the hell out of the welfare system). She is spoiled and STILL is in housing development. So now that no one is her maid she is raising hell. It's been almost 3 years and still no divorce, why cuz she is trying to get money he does not have and wants sole custody of the kids after she was violent to him. (of course he dropped the charges dumbass) The judge and both parties lawyers keep telling her she is wasting her time, there is no hidden money and why does she want sole custody, her only reason, the BF started a new job and could not make an appointment that she had to go to for their daughter. One whole appointment when he is at everything else.

I have been as patient as possible. I have been upfront. Their kids - one (adopted daughter) in college who has not talked to him in almost 3 years (who he pays 1/2 tuition for) one son 17 who all of a sudden after having fun and driving with his father just stopped talking to him. One 10 and one 12 who just became a 'woman'. I have none, never wanted any because I love being everybody's auntie. Told the BF that I am not okay with all of a sudden raising teenage daughters, especially since (and forgive me for saying this) one of them is bond to turn out like the mom.

He wants to marry me but when is that supposed to happen? I'm 42 and have been waiting for his divorce going on 3 years now. They are legally separated. She gets over 1200 a month for child support and he pays all their health and dental. Meanwhile she's on social media sites looking for the next guy and buying laptops and looking for a new apartment. He was bullied, abused and treated like a doormat and now his 2 eldest are not even talking to him? WTF? Am I crazy or do we see a serious case of PAS coming (Parental Alienation Syndrome).

I see a bad future here. He wants sole custody too because he does not want the 2 younger ones to turn out like her. They have a trial in July for the divorce, I though only rich people wen to trial? I think she is buying time to keep f'ing him over and if he wants sole custody that will be a whole new fight. My fear is I marry him, start a life and all of a sudden have to be a step-mom (never wanted to do that!) to teenagers daughters? And I know this is crap to say but chances are one of them will end up a teenage mom like the mom and man is that a deal breaker!

I asked him straight out if his kids were spoiled and were they allowed to walk all over him? I have met the younger 2 ONCE. We both think it's a good idea to keep our relationship quiet from the kids until the divorce is complete, when the f will that be I have no idea. One of them looked me up and down like she was grown, ewwwwwww. I have yet to see their actual relationship and for all I know he is probably a doormat for them too. As I type this I know my decision is to RUN! I guess I just needed to get it out.

Any words of wisdom? I just need support to keep running....

Thanks