Would BM's mom be considered a legit "day care" for CS purposes?
We are starting to suspect that BM is planning to impute some costs associated with her mom watching the skids before/after school when BM works.
BM's mom lives with her full time and has no other job. She is not a licensed child care provider (not that it's required for babysitting, just including that in here). She watches the skids at their home for up to 2 hours each day until BM gets home or after she goes to work.
She has previously said that she gets this care for free, and therefore DH is not required to pay half (CO requires they split day care costs).
We think, however, now that she realizes her CS will drop to almost $0 (and she may even possibly own DH), that she's going to start adding in costs. She will likely say she's paying her mom, even if she's not.
Would a court find this legit? Under what circumstances do you think she'd be able to make this work to her benefit?
She could get her mom in
She could get her mom in trouble with the IRS if her mom doesn't claim the fake money as income. You may have to add a clause to your CO about the qualifying factors for paying for child care. You could also start charging DH for child care on his time and play tit for tat with BM. You cannot rely on getting a judge who will see this ploy for what it is.
We're hoping (fingers
We're hoping (fingers crossed!!) that this won't actually go to court.
Lawyers are currently in talks negotiating the change order; which will include child support. The child support is based on the state calculators, but the inputs vary depending on who's doing the input (BM likes to get creative).
Yes, I mentioned this option
Yes, I mentioned this option to DH. If BM tries to push to have day care included, he will have this added. Or try to anyway ..
For Child Care to be factored
For Child Care to be factored into CS, my understanding is, that it has to be through a licensed person/facility. Then you should also request statements/receipts.
This is my gut instinct as
This is my gut instinct as well .. at a minimum, DH and BM share joint physical/legal custody. So if he's paying for day care, he'd have the right to demand it be a licensed facility/provider.
We found out that DF has no
We found out that DF has no say in who BM uses to watch the kids during her time. He is required to pay if she is working or in school full time.
They went to court over this because she wanted him to pay for a high price day care for SD6 (she was 4 at the time). He wanted to enroll her in free, full day preK in a public school.
Judge said mom gets to decide if she wants to use a day care, family member, friend or public school.
In the end he didn't have to pay anything because BM was only going to school two nights a week. The fact that she's a lazy ass ended up saving him huge bucks.
Do they have joint custody?
Do they have joint custody? My brother had a similar problem with his ex-wife .. she wanted to enroll their kid in private school; my brother wanted free public school. Judge ruled in my brother's favor. It could be a lot different when it comes to school versus day care though.
If she does try to say that
If she does try to say that Grandma is paid for watching the stepkids, then you tell BM you want Grandma's taxpayer ID number because you plan to file her on your list of exemptions come tax time. That should shut her up.
Oh .. we absolutely plan to
Oh .. we absolutely plan to play hardball if she chooses to go this route. I'm just curious if the courts would even entertain this to begin with .. I suppose anything is possible!
I would also suspect that
I would also suspect that since we have it in writing from BM that she is not paying her mom, that the court would probably take that into consideration
The courts entertain
The courts entertain everything. That is how they stay in business.
I know...don't remind me...
I know...don't remind me... :sick:
Sounds like the game BM
Sounds like the game BM played by charging to have a family friend and HER BM to watch skids. Yep, $200 a week daycare expenses. Submitted to the court (NYS) and sure enough, the BM's BM got PAID! I have many, many other sad but horror stories.
I remember when the BM had
I remember when the BM had braces rolled into the CS. These were purely cosmetic braces and she liked to slap each kid (there are three) in braces the SECOND they each turned eight years old.
Dumbass Guilty Daddy "trusted" the BM to let him know when "his share" (50%) was paid off. Guess what? Guilty Daddy ended up paying 200% of the oldest two's orthodonture cost as the extra CS kept right on a rollin' after the braces had LOOONNNNG been paid for.
Side note: Generally Guilty Daddy doesn't care what amount of $$$ goes out to the BM because MY salary pays for 99.9% of all bills and household expenses--there's practically nothing left after he pays CS and taxes. He's told me several times in so many words that he doesn't care that he pays an astronomical amount because MY salary pays the bills! Most men would be ASHAMED but not him!
Anyway. . . after *I* had pointed out this "error" when I finally convinced Guilty Daddy to go for a downward mod, the CS Magistrate (who is friends with the BM and works with her daily--the BM is a CPS worker) said basically "water under the bridge--gift to the BM" And so he (actually I) had to take a bath on it. :barf:
That is usually how it works,
That is usually how it works, anything over CS is considered a gift. He also had a financial duty to know how much he had to pay and for how long. Trusting your ex when it comes to $$ is stupid.
Unfortunately we're not close
Unfortunately we're not close enough to do this. BM moved about 45 miles away (over an hour in DC metro traffic) about 2 months ago.