Hi, I have twin daughters in high school and a step son who will be 21 in Sept and a step daughter who will be 20 in December. I don't know what to do and am ready to lose my mind.

The step kids are extremely immature. They are unable to plan anything, have no friends and just hang around the house all summer. They were unable to get their acts together to obtain licenses when they were 16 so they didn't get them until they were 18. They are home from college and with us EVERY weekend and one night per week. Their mother doesn't like to work so just got a job last year, has been living off of child support, and refuses to work full time. She doesn't pay any money toward their college, books, clothes, etc. She declared bankruptcy when her house was up for auction and when the house was saved because of the bankruptcy she went to Puerto Rico for a week with her boyfriend. Getting the picture?

I told my husband that I just cannot sit around this summer and watch tv with him and his kids. I did it the last 5 years and enough is enough. They have NO friends so really don't go anywhere, the boy works only 14 hours per week. We wanted him to work more but my husband doesn't really say anything to him about getting another job. My husband feels guilty about divorcing his ex wife and so doesn't like to upset his kids. I think he and his ex wife have done a huge disservice to his kids. They are unable to do anything on their own, have no social skills and just look a mess all the time.

The latest was: We told them to bring calendars to our house and went over the whole summer with them. Told them that next week we will be attending a wedding and they will be dropped back off at their mothers or work early, we had to leave at 1:00 p.m., and they would need to get a ride to their mothers house and stay there Sunday night. The boy asks me the Wed before the wedding, one week after writing all this down on their calendars, if my husband and I can pick him up in the city on our way home because he wanted to go to a movie. I said no, we didn't know what time we would be coming home. The night before the wedding we asked step daughter if she was all set with rides the next day and had she talked with her mom, she said yes, all set.

Sunday comes we are dropping ss off at train to go to city and sd to work and my husband asked if her mom was picking her up at work. She looks at us like we are crazy and has no idea what we are talking about. Now my husband is pissed, gives her money for her and her brother to take taxi and then he complains about how irresponsible they are for the next 8 hours. Fun night at the wedding. This happens ALL the time.

This behavior has upset and ruined plans for all of us. My children never have these issues and are younger than his. My husband is always so amazed at how my children are able to plan and function and have friends. He gets upset at his kids all the time but doesn't do anything about it. He says, "What can I do? They are too old to punish." I get that but I am sick to death of all the drama they cause and then my husband and I usually end up arguing about it.

Sorry this is so long I just needed to vent. Thank you