Really!!!!
Forums:
So after bitching for an hour about dinner (and we had pizza something sd eats ALL the time) sd 5 finally decides to eat has the candy daddy promised her if she ate then 10 mins later says can I have another piece of pizza wtf????? I'm so tired of this. I say to him all the time I can't stand the negotiations of bites with dinner and the bribes yet nothing changes. This is a huge pet peeve with me. I was raised as I raised my children that you eat whatever is put in front of you. I not only think it is good manners and respectful of the person that cooked for you but it teaches them as we'll. am I totally wrong or am I just so far gone that any little thing is going to bug the hell out of me?
She is five and my DD will be
She is five and my DD will be five in a few months and I have the same frustrations with her. Not all the time but today we are fighting over her eating the chicken noodle soup she threw a fit to have. This happens every time with chicken noodle soup. My mother says she eats it fine for her. SO today we are in a Mexican standoff. I won't let her eat anything else until she eats those darn noodles. She had a fit for the soup at the store and it was all about labeling (Scooby Doo noodles). I should know better but I still do it. You need to tell DH to stand firm and stop negotiating. As Former says we don't negotiate with terrorists. My DD is being a terrorist.
It really just drives me
It really just drives me crazy she loves something one day bitches cries and whines about it the nex time. She doesn't eat properly at all never eats her lunch at school and constantly has snacks,treats and candies cus that's how daddy deals with her and it especially gets me cus I do all the cooking and am always trying to make things that all 3 kids like and eat. It makes it very difficult when she bitches after she has totally lied something honestly I think I'm done
My SS pulled that crap at 9
My SS pulled that crap at 9 and his dad gave in to him every time. The thing that got me was the rest of us couldn't eat what we liked for dinner because SS no longer liked it. WTF? He can just not eat it, no reason the rest of us have to eat kiddie food and be miserable.
DD is not that bad about refusing to eat things she ate the day before but we do have battles over you took it now you need to eat it or finish it. Thankfully it is not daily but that is because I refuse to give treats up. There is no dessert unless you finish your meal and I have no problem getting a treat for myself as a way to motivate her to finish up.
See and that's the problem he
See and that's the problem he promises her a treat before dinner then we all have to sit there and listen to her whine and complain through the whole dinner but technically she ate so she gets the treat at the end. I don't think we should have to listen to it nor should she get something when all she has done is complain and ruin dinner for everyone else. Maybe if she starts again I will ask her to leave the room with her plate and eat somewhere else
I totally agree echo and that
I totally agree echo and that is my mentality. The problem lies in her father and it doesn't matter what I say, how much I tell him it bugs me etc etc it never changes.
We did this last night with
We did this last night with our BS (he's 4). He didn't want to eat his meal at supper time. He said he wasn't hungry. I told him that he is not getting ANYTHING ELSE until he finishes every little morsel on his plate. He agreed to these conditions. He wanted to be excused from the table and we said no, you wait until everyone is finished eating, so you might as well finish what is on your plate.
Two hours later he asks for ice cream. We reminded him that he gets nothing until he finishes his supper (which was still sitting on the table. BS says he is full. "Well if you are full, that means you can't eat ice cream". HA! HA! The look on BS's face was priceless! Damn it, I've been foiled!. So BS actually sat back down and ate everything on his plate. Then the best part happened....I asked him if he wanted ice cream and he said no. He was now thirsty and he just wanted juice now.
It was a moment of triumph! I was proud of the little guy. He didn't whine and he didn't cry. We set the rules for him and he understood. He tried to weasel his way out of it sure, but when he realized that wasn't going to work, he realized it was simply better to do as he was told
My SS on the other hand? He's 13 and he is a lost cause. He nibbles at his meals and then tries to coherse his mother into getting a snack which she will sometimes allow (for some lame reason or another) (i.e. "Well he just had his karate class, We should let him eat something"). DW never disciplined SS the way we do BS. We try to do the same thing to SS that we do with our bios ("No snacks unless you finish everything on your plate!") but I am afraid it is too late. To date, SS has never chosen to go back to the table to finish his meal. He will even forgo snacks to avoid his left over supper-plate. Then at bedtime, he'll complain he can't sleep because he is "sooooo hungry!" and out come the waterworks of tears. I for one have no problem sending SS to bed starving and crying but DW can't. Anyways, I really don't care about SS's eating habits anymore but I refuse to entertain his bad habits which is why I don't buy "snack foods" when he is around.
I like what you guys did!
I like what you guys did!
My sd does this too, you're
My sd does this too, you're not over reacting as I feel the same way! She needs to eat the same that everyone else is or go to her room. Not given her choice. This just happened this morning actually, and she never eats it. She takes a couple of bites and it becomes waste.
I try to set routine and like
I try to set routine and like I said when she is just with me there is no question. The problem is she knows her father will give in and he does. We have talked many times about being on the same page but it doesn't change. And then when she goes to her moms (which is not very often) her mom sits there and spoon feeds her really she's 5 yrs old....no wonder this kid is so confused
Dinner table antics are one
Dinner table antics are one of the easiest things to disengage from. If the kid's FATHER doesn't care if she eats a healthy, well-balanced diet .. then you can't force her to. So stop trying.
Make your meals. Let him make her plates. If she won't eat what you cook, let HIM make her something else.
If you can't stand the bickering/bargaining/negotiating, eat somewhere else or at a different time.
Just REMOVE yourself from the situation (physically if not mentally), and stop talking to her about it.
The part that pisses me off
The part that pisses me off is when she is here without daddy dearest she doesn't dare try this shit but because she knows he will give in she pulls it. I understand your point completely but why should I be the one to leave my table in my house
Attention like that with food
Attention like that with food can create an eating disorder. It gives the child the wrong messages including making her feel in control. They will try to use food as a weapon to gain what they want.