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Why did I do it?

Lady's picture

Submitted by Lady on Tue, 11/06/2012 - 9:53pm

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Adult Stepchildren

I was doing a little shopping today .I was minding my own business and turned the corner of the isle and came face to face with my SDIL.It happened so fast and I said to her how are you? I realized right then I shouldnt have said that to her.I just kept walking and never looked back.Of course she never said a word back to me .It makes me sick to have spoke to her and I didnt mean to speak, it just came out.I regret it.I bet she called all of her backstabbing friends and told them I was chasing her. I have always been told be nice to people who mistreat you.Well in this family when you try to be nice to them it makes them much more hateful. Glad they dont exsist anymore.

jennaspace's picture

Submitted by jennaspace on Wed, 11/07/2012 - 2:21am

You did the right thing in my opinion. You weren't PA, you weren't snide, you didn't lower yourself to treat her as you've been treated. You didn't allow her bad behavior to determine what you do and say.

Treating someone with dignity is a reflection on your class, not theirs.

Want my life back's picture

Submitted by Want my life back on Thu, 11/08/2012 - 5:20am

I had a similar situation, walking along the footpath to see the 27SD walking towards me. She had a cold stone face that looked like thunder, I knew she wouldn't say hello to me so when i was about two strides from her I said hello- and her name, she gave a very strained hello back , it was like gold. I told DH about my encounter and as usual, on her defensive- she probably didn't recognize it was you- WTF- only known me for approx 16 years...

20YearsAsAStep-Mom's picture

Submitted by 20YearsAsAStep-Mom on Thu, 11/08/2012 - 5:46am

I am disengaged from SD too and if I saw her out in public I would definitely say Hello - how are you. I am not a caveman. I think you did what most normal - POLITE - respectful people do. I know you regret it, but remember SD will look like the idiot, not you. I hope you can let it go and if it does make you too uncomfortable, next time just keep walking. Take care.