How would you respond???
Yup SD15 again.........(I read DH's text messages over the weekend for the first time in a long time and this is what I found)
FDH text SD15 a message the other day RANDOMLY (idk y he would do this) asking SD15 if him and I were to have a child together one day if she would want a brother or a sister????
Her response:
"I'm not around much so it wouldn't really matter anyway. You and goincrazy are cruel to BD8 and don't have time for either of us so why would you guys even think of bringing a baby into the picture when you don't even spend time or pay attention to the kids you already have. Sorry dad if this hurts your feelings but its my honest opinion"
:jawdrop:
Wow, apparently having rules and expections is cruelty now days, just shows her lack there of
*******DH'S RESPONSE: "I'm sorry"
"I'm sorry"??????? Are you f'n kidding me????? :jawdrop:
How would you respond?????
its because the DH is seeking
its because the DH is seeking the approval of the SD!!!!!!! it's definitely bu...hit!!! who the hell ask their child if it's ok if they have another child???..seriously.........i would never sit down or text my child and ask...what do you think about us having a baby..but i am telling you this is what men do sometimes out of guilt........when my husband and i were getting married...he asked my step son what he thought?????..to me it showed my husbands insecurity in his own decisions?????..and its sad....have you confronted him yet???..i used to look at my husbands texts but i had to stop because he was lieing to me and i was going crazy...be careful with that..........once i stopped i was able to keep me out of it...they don't tell the truth when it comes to the step children their mothers etc....i wish he could but he wont....and i know that now so i take what he says with a grain of salt and know there is only half truth when it comes to his exwife and his son...........
WE both agree ONE day we
WE both agree ONE day we would like to have a child together maybe ONE DAY, he didn't ask her if we should have a kid he asked her if she would want a brother or sister. And I def think he did it out of guilt to "make her feel included or a part of things" Not sure but I feel it was totally inappropriate and her opinion doesn't f'n matter anyway. Won't even be considered in making any desicion between FDH and I. I was just blown away by him saying "I'm sorry" Thats giving in and basically agreeing with what she says is how I took it.
Is she even right about him
Is she even right about him not having time for his kids? I think the idiot is your DH and not skid....
Not at all, She makes a
Not at all, She makes a choice to not be around because we have rules. WE don't drop everything we are doing and give her rides to her friends house when she calls 5 min before she wants to go so therefore "we don't have time" She's a lying manipulator
Why in the hell would he aske
Why in the hell would he aske her that? She gave an honest answer that she believed, but he still apologized? Your DH is in need of serious therapy....
Thats exactly what I said,
Thats exactly what I said, Why the F would he even go there and say that esp knowing she hates me and doesn't come around? Thas OUR business that we haven't even finished discussing for our future............
I agree her answer is honest and she is entitled to her own opinion- they both need therapy
There's nothing for you to
There's nothing for you to respond to, unless you mean you want to discuss it with DH.
First, were you snooping? That may piss him off.
Second, why would he ask SD a question like that?
Third, is what SD said true? She says she isn't around much, so it wouldn't affect her. True? She says you guys don't spend much time with the kids you have. True?
It would really piss me off that DH asked her that question.
first and foremost, he
first and foremost, he shouldn't be discussing that issue with his kid. it probably gives her the impression that she has a say in the matter. a few years ago when fdh and i were arguing about a baby (i wanted one, he didn't), one of his bullshit excuses was that he didn't want sd14 at the time, to "feel even more left out than she already does". i lost my shit in a hurry. i told him there was NO way i was letting a 14 year old KID decide if i got to have another baby or not! i told him it isn't my fault or my problem if she feels left out. it isn't my fault her parents aren't together. it isn't my fault she doesn't live here full time and therefore has to miss out on some thing. life goes on without her. i was f'g livid. and guess who won that argument? bs4 says it all. }:)
Exactly, He knows she doesn't
Exactly, He knows she doesn't like me, what did he think her response was going to be????
Yes, I want to sit down and
Yes, I want to sit down and talk to DH calmly about it. I freaked out on him and said some mean things. But I was being honest about him, SD and the entire situation. I was pissed he just said I'm sorry. I'm annoyed he didn't stand up for us and more so for himself. He doesn't call her out on anything and takes the blame for them not spending time together???? Bullshit. My daughters father is not in her life. She is with me/us, 24/7. How do we not pay atention or spend time with her???
I know my life and I know I'm a good mother so I don't have to justify what she says, it just makes me angry that she says these things and feels this way when it's so ass backwards and FDH just goes along with it.......
Yup, it does. He has this
Yup, it does. He has this fairytale idea that one day we are going to be a happy family and all of us will get along and be happy and together. He says this to me that he just wants everyone to get along........Of course he does, who wouldn't but thats not OUR reality right now and I feel like his actions are making things go from bad to worse
Sounds like a smart girl????
Sounds like a smart girl???? You obviously haven't read any previous posts. I'm well aware of your reponses and being against anyone getting married or having children together and thats not reality for most us. You can have your opinion but I don't agree with it
Her and I don't talk. That
Her and I don't talk. That was a convo between them. I'm not saying anything to her- like I said if thats how she feels shes entitled to her opinion. I'm upset with Fdh and want to talk about this again calmly and I have so many thoughts and I'm angry so I'm trying to figure out a good way to respond to him about the whole situation.
I'm sure, wouldn't surprise me in the least if he deleted some msgs.
Yes, this is a very recent conversation, that we haven't even decided on yet........And their text conversation reguarding this post was also recent. I just don't get why he would even bring it up to her. I think Hypovic is right. He is seeking her approval which he's not going to get.
How disappointing
First thing is i font feel
First thing is i font feel that she was snooping it is er dhs phone and sorry but spouced gave the right to see eath others things. If thete is notjing to hide whats the prob. Hats just it people ONLY get defendsive if there is anything to hide.
Ops dh k owz he shouldnt have asked but he did. Op if i were u would come from the angle that if he gets drensive then he knowd he was in the wrong kwim?
Fdh and I both have access to
Fdh and I both have access to eachothers phones, "snooping" wasn't even brought up
Ok, then.
Ok, then.
google Emotional Incest a
google
Emotional Incest
a good read.
okay- this is TOO much?????
okay- this is TOO much????? Did I not just read your post about her crawling in YOUR bed with him???
Why is he seeking approval from his 15 year old? Does she run your marriage? HOW is this her business? I'd be irrate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is NONE of her business! You TWO are married - not them! This is so disturbing.
Yup, it's been a rough few
Yup, it's been a rough few days. I'm angry- I think he's desperate and grasping for any type of relationship or response from her, I'm not making excuses bc I DO NOT think this is ok. Thats why I'm angry this is NONE of her business. I think she used to run him before I came in the picture..........We are going to go to herapy and if that doesn't help I'm gonna have to go. At this rate it's not even healthy for me to be in this type of relationship and the last thing I want is a pushover husband who seeks approval from his teenager. Insecure much?
I'm just super disappointed and exhausted, wondering wtf is going on with him
Her response- ouch! Like a
Her response- ouch! Like a jilted lover. And he bought right into it. You, him and her could have your own "sister wives" show. The beginnig, when they play the theme song, could be him in bed with the 2 of you, one on either side. :sick: :sick: :sick: Maybe show him your post and the responses? I don't know what is going on with him but it is futt bucked up.