Help with how to teach my 2 yr old to stay away from SB 10 who is a risk to him, see my blog for more info
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My stepson who was abused awhile back by his maternal grandfather has turned into a complete mess. I need some ideas on some things I can do to start to teach my two year old to stay away from him when he comes, or to help him not to want to have a relationship with him. We have done and are doing what we can to help my SS, but I need to know what I can do to teach my BS to be safe.
First, trying to teach an
First, trying to teach an innocent child to stay away from his half brother is wrong. Trying to keep him from any relationship is wrong.
Simple.
Now, if you're concerned about son's SAFETY, do what you can to protect the both of them. Don't leave them alone together. Speak with your son (which you should do anyway) about inappropriate touching and looking. Let him know that you will always listen to him and he won't get in trouble for what he tells you.
Actually if it means that he
Actually if it means that he will be harmed sexually, it is not wrong, I can't teach a two year old about appropriate touching and so forth.
That would fall under "don't
That would fall under "don't leave them alone together unsupervised."
Yes, it's still wrong to try to turn your innocent child against others.
Hate is learned.
Just never leave them
Just never leave them unsupervised or have your dh visit elsewhere. Or be gone a lot while he is there.
If you're afraid your SS will
If you're afraid your SS will abuse your BS, why are you staying?
That is a hard one, What dose
That is a hard one, What dose your hubby say about all this? Is he worried too?
CJ I understand what you are
CJ I understand what you are saying. Although my ss was never abused I have always thought he is not of good character for my daughter. SS was 11 when my daughter was born, she is 5 now.
In the ealier days, I would monitor their play, and never left them alone in the room. SS has since then proved he can not "play nicely" so I no longer allow it (I have also since 100% disenagaged.) I have done this though without really having my daughter see it.
We have ss EOW, so those weekends, BD is 100% with me. There are times when it would be easierv to leave her with DH (her father) but I don't. If we don't go out, I keep her occupied with games, arts & crafts etc. DH helps out also by keeping his son busy with him. Basically EOW it is myslef and ny daughter alone, and DH and his son alone.
Both DH and SS know how I feel, BD does not. She does say she likes ss and asks when he is coming again even when they really only see each other in passing through the weekend.
I disagree that this is teaching my daughter hate, I am keeping my daughter safe. It can be done in a subtle way.
I agree with spoildbrataging.
I agree with spoildbrataging. you just have to do what ever you need to to protect your son. Dont feel bad if you seperate your ss. It is better to be seperated then later on to feel sorry.
Overitall who posted above
Overitall who posted above seemed to have things under control but it took/takes a lot of work.
Minimize it by telling Dad to take the boy away from the home as much as possible. During the summer it'll be camping trips. Great way to maximize quality time with Dad. I'm serious. Each and every weekend he visits.
When camping isn't possible he takes the boy on day trips to parks, movies, playgrounds whatever. When he must be at home implement Overitall's suggestions.