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What to do?

vhouston57's picture

Ok, here the deal the man I'm suppose to marry have four chilren with different women. I can't say nothin to that because I hva three. The thing is my boyfriend moved in with me with his twin sons he was keeping for the summer. I was ok with it I worked during the day at that time so when I get off I had to go pick up my children an prepare dinner. I had no problem feedin the boys or washing there clothes. I. Neeed help with the bills though an he was treated my hospitality as a free ride. He was constantlyly out spending his yneployment money on him an his boys whil I struggle to make ends meet for me an my children. So I told him he has to pay if he going to be in my home an that the boys had to go to camp an not sit around my home all day playing video games. This went on the whole summer then he bring his other son, whose 3 an his daughter a day later. He has all kinds of baby mama drama. He costantly thinks I'm suppose to due for his kids. After I lost my job he had the only income so I was home to take care of things when his other two children cam an able to do. Wmanly things for him. Shortly after I got back in school. I wasn't able to wait on him hand an foot and I got tire of even seeing his chilren. I felt I have three of my own why am I helping take care of his. He little girl is 1years old and it obvious she comes from a bad enviroment. She use to stayin up late an she wine an dose things a one year old shoulnt. He looks at how my kids are raise an I feel he jelouse his are not like mine. He tries to forcehis kids to act civil but there raise different. When his 3 year old come over he was loud, rowdy, and sneaks around the house. The mother dosent send proper clothing so I'm forced to take from my son to give to him. His dad refuses to buy the boy closths cause he pay child support. I love him but I'm tire of the bm drama an his children. My kids are still youg their self he dosent help me with them why do I have to give my home an my peace over to him an his kids. Don't kno what to do. On top of everthin else th daugter he has is by an18 an he 31. He goes over there every Friday and sit with her an his daugter. He dosent check on his twin anymore there now in the system. He says he did all he can do. He dosent even call for them but his son an daughter he stay in contact with them an their mothers. His twins was the reason we moved in togeter. They weren't bad boy just lost and confuse being that the were living wit an aunt. Out of all his kids they need him the most.

MamaBecky's picture

You want to know what to do. End the relationship and make him move out and the count your blessings that you didn't marry into that mess!! Don't look back.

vhouston57's picture

Just addin details. My grandfather has made a decent living for himself so I pretty much live rent free an in a decent neighborhood. I have one more year then I will be a lpn. My kids are very well mannered. I'm youg but I have been married before so I grew up pretty fast. I sometime feel as though I may be his way out, since he comes from a bad area and was raised different. I also no longer wish to date I really want the comfort of marriage back. I feel it will behard for me to find a mate with three children.

the_stepmonster's picture

Sweetie, this just sounds like a bad situation. If you go through with marrying this man, you will have to deal with all his children and all the baby mama drama that goes along with it for the rest of your life. If a man loves you, you shouldn't have to ask him to help out with the finances of the home. He wouldn't dare mooch off of you. If you stay with him, you will undoubtedly have his baby #5, your baby #4, and will have eight kids to support. Considering you are in school and he is unemployed, this does not sound like an ideal situation. Think hard about what you really want out of life. If this is all you want, then great. If you want more out of life, remove yourself from this situation quickly.

Madam Hedgehog's picture

Get out of there. STAT. You don't want to be part of that chaos. And you don't want to be stuck with some guy who won't hold up his end of the bargain, while he is more than happy to take your money, your house, your food, and your love for granted.