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My Grandma past away today

purpledaisies's picture

I am just so sad, she was a wonderful person. My dh is trying so hard to be there for me but I think I just need some time for me right now. She helped raise me, I even lived with her from the time I was 14. I got teary today when it happened but didn't really cry till I got in bed with dh.

We were all there, we knew it was the end. I keep going back to remember when....

This is going to be a rough week as the funeral is not til Sat. AND some of the kids want a really bad pic of her for her programs. GMA would NOT have wanted a pic like that displayed, she was always the type that HAD to have make and her hair done ALWAYS> She told me all the time that you need to keep yourself pretty and looking good for your husband at all times.

My Crazy aunt couldn't stand that the attention was not on her and so she would scream her older sisters name when ever she was trying to talk to any of the other sisters and say "she is not gone" and have a huge production! She did it about 4 times! :sick: I noticed it was ONLY when oldest sis wat talking to anyone else or trying to console them.

Anyway I refused to talk to any of them and crazy aunts dh tried to talk to me and I ignored him. Then he started preaching to everyone about needing to get right with god before we die. I was there for my GMA NOT to be preached at!!

CalgonTakeMeAway's picture

I'm so sorry about your grandma. Sad Death brings out the best and worst in people. I hope you can ignore the craziness and just focus on what's important to you. You can't control their actions, but you can choose how you respond. I hope you get some time for yourself. Prayers for you and your family. Hugs!

purpledaisies's picture

Thanks so much.

Are you new? I haven't been on in about a week, I have been on vacation and the day we get back I got the call to come as fast as I can for gma.

I will just ignore them as much as I can. A couple of their own kids will not have anything to do with them at all. They haven't seen 3 of their grandkids ever, not from the day they were born b/c of their craziness.

I will tell you that if she starts in on my mom I may just have to put her in her place like I have done before. My mom is the type to just take it and not say anything. My brother when he was 5 knew she was crazy and told her off when she made mom cry. Mom is in the bathroom crying and I hear my bro screaming at her and calling her names. I had to get him and make her leave. I was only 12. She has a LONG history even been in the loony bin twice. Yep I have my hands full with that one.

CalgonTakeMeAway's picture

Yep, I'm new. I've been here a few weeks I guess. Ugh, good luck with the crazy. It's nice that you're there to protect your mom. Everybody's emotions are going to be high. I wonder what she would do if you just acted like she wasn't there. I'm sorry you have to deal with that on top of gma. Hang in there!

purpledaisies's picture

Yeah I wasn't on much the week or so leading up to our vac. I was packing and getting ready for it.

I will but I will ignore til she does something to upset mom. I treated her like she wasn't there today. I know wrong but she burned a HUGE bridge with me the day she told mom that she doesn't deserve to have another child and she should give it to her as she doesn't have any. I was there heard her, made mom so upset. Her exact words were you already have 2 and a girl and boy and I don't have any you should give this one to me. Then she tried to get us taken away from mom and dad so she could get us after she became a foster parent. the kid she was trying to get mom to give to her is my bro that told her off LOL

CalgonTakeMeAway's picture

LOL..I'm sorry for laughing, but that is so ridiculous. Thank goodness she doesn't have kids! I don't think it's wrong to ignore somebody that's nasty to you or loved ones. It's better than getting into it with her. Really, good luck..you're gonna need it!

purpledaisies's picture

She does have kids. She adopted 10 kids! AND yep the oldest ones that are out of the house will not have a thing to do with them!

CalgonTakeMeAway's picture

Holy crap! Good thing they don't have her genes then! I guess adoption laws used to be a lot looser!

purpledaisies's picture

I don't know how she did it but I do know she did it for the money, she said so. Which is sad b/c there are so many other people that would have given them a wonderful loving home with out the money. SHe would not take a child unless they came with a check every month til they were 18.

dodgegal05's picture

I am so sorry. My grandma raised me from almost birth. When she passes my life will be devastated for a long time. I hope your family can settle their issues before the funeral.

Roseybird's picture

Purp,
I'm sorry to hear about your GMA. Take one day at a time. Ignore the stupidity that comes out when families get together during a bereavement. It can drive you insane. Focus on the good times you had with your GMA and know that you will one day see her again!

God bless you, Sweetie...

purpledaisies's picture

Thanks so much ladies. I have done everything I can to have nothing to do with crazy aunt. I haven't talked to her in years except when she rears her ugly head to try to be nasty to me. I have blocked her 3 times from face book and reported her, I didn't respond to her.

I know this is the last time we have anything to do with her or be near her. I am so glad I hate the negativity she brings and the nasty crap she brings and the bad she brings out in people.

I am talking to her 2 kid right now as she refuses to talk to them but she loves the rest of the family. We are doing our best to help her through this. My cousin said that crazy aunt told one of the other kids that gma deserved all this b/c of the way she treated them when they were kids by not letting them jump on her couch and stuff. :jawdrop: This woman needs to be in the loony bin for a very long time. My gma was old school yes but I never ever remember her using big ben (her belt she had hung on the wall that she all told us she would use), I remember her making us sit in front of the microwave watching the clock for an hour for something we did mainly fighting. LOL But NO gma was never mean to us ever! I have been there when she was there with her kids to and nope I never remember gma being mean. Even the kid that I'm talking to said gma was never mean and was very hurt by what her mom said. She LOVED gma and remember crazy aunt adopted these kids. Gma loved them like she did all of us.

Sorry for the ranting. Smile

lucky2bme87's picture

Sorry to hear about your grandmother. It's hard enough to deal with something like that without all the stress family drama can bring. My condolences go out to you and your loved ones.