BM has time to stalk us because she quit her job.
SS5 informed us that his mommy was done with her job. We thought it was just confusion because he's young and doesn't understand alot of things. Then FDH goes to get the kids in the morning the next day and notices BM is wearing sweats 15 minutes before she is due at work. Odd. It happens again two days later.
So, we started thinking about this and the fact that she'd had time to drive by our house in the middle of the day for the last couple weeks.
Interesting.
How does this effect the whole custody thing? Isn't she required to inform FDH if she loses her job? Does this mean FDH will get custody because she has no means of supporting the kids at all? I just don't understand how the "primary caretaker" could quit her job and the judge would leave the kids wit her.
ps - thanks to everyone who's been responding to my posts so far. I've tried to reply to you all, but I'm having trouble with CAPTCHA blocking my replies.
Time to go back to court me
Time to go back to court me thinks and have everything re-evaluated.
Hey at least your BM has the
Hey at least your BM has the balls to stalk you herself. C*ntzilla uses 3rd parties lol stupid bitch :jawdrop:
That's really funny you
That's really funny you mention that, justanothegirl, because that's exactly how this started out. FDH's dad showed up to visit and said he was glad that FDH and his sister and brother in law were all getting along again. FDH immediately said that was definintely not the case and he didn't speak to any of them anymore. Well, then FDH's dad informed us that his sister and brother in law knew EXACTLY where we lived (one week after moving) and had offered to show him how to get to our new place. Well, of course, BM and FDH's sister are best friends so I'm pretty sure she had people driving by the house to check on whatever made-up drama she'd spewed out. Uck . . . The woman exhausts me. How did she become so ambitious? I can't imagine having the energy to meddle with other peoples' business all the time, much less get other people to do so as well.
Hate to tell you, but the
Hate to tell you, but the opposite can happen...especially if she was laid off and is now receiving unemployment. Just b/c a mom doesn't have a job, doesn't mean she is going to lose her kids. In fact, she can possibly now get more CS out of the dad since her income has been reduced. Judges leave kids with moms all the time who don't have jobs. If she just quit her job, then the courts will probably impute to her what she is capable of earning. If she was fired/laid off, then you just get minimum wage imputed to her.
Even if a dad doesn't have a job, the courts will calculate child support based on minimum wage and he will still get to have visitation with his kids. Sorry she'll be stalking you now. Our BM is a SAHM and it seems she sits at home all day bored out of her mind thinking up ways to ruin our lives.
If she is voluntarily
If she is voluntarily underemployed, the judge can impute income. Our judge just imputed income for BM1 because she is voluntarily unemployed and has no income, but there is no reason she can't work a job making at least minimum wage, so he imputed her income at full time minimum wage and that's her child support calculation figure.
BM2 has an alleged reason to be unemployed so she got the state minimum amount to pay, which is $50. Pretty much a joke.
DH is custodial of 2 of his kids and has 50/50 of the other, plus we have one so far together and my 2 bios. In the fall of last year his company he was working at went under, and he went from making $10k a month to bringing home less than $2k a month. It doesn't matter. His kids have stability, their lifestyle didn't change one iota (except daddy no longer has to work 80 hours a week) and they never skipped a beat. He's not voluntarily underemployed, either. The industry he was working in is no longer existant and he had to start over. Fortunately he was never the breadwinner, I have been and still am, and in my state, it doesn't matter what I make. It really doesn't matter what he makes. CS is figured on the BMs income only except in the shared custody situation with BM3, and he pays her $7.38 a month. She doesn't make any more than he does.
There is more to finances when it comes to a custody situation, and often the judge will award custody to a stay at home mom on assistance while ordering her ex to pay an exhorbidant amount of CS. Not fair, but that's how it is.
This is totally nuts. I
This is totally nuts. I really want to know who cooked up the whole CS nonsense in the first place. Yes, both parents should support the children. One parent SHOULD NOT be obligated to support the other freaking parent though. They should also calculate how much it costs to feed and clothe a kid and that should be the standard child support cost, end of story. It shouldn't matter how much anyone makes. It is not more expensive to feed a kid just because dad makes more money.
The custody situation is a complete mess and extremely sexist IMHMO. I can't believe any judge would give custody to a single parent who voluntarily quit their job when they have kids to support. This is such a mess. Between FDH and I, we can watch the boys every hour of every day except for about 9 hours when our job schedule overlap. So, over a 7 day period they would spend a total of 9 hours in some sort of babysitting situation. Currently, despite the fact that BM has quit her job, she is still sending the boys to daycare for 18 hours a week. And that's because the rest of the time we take care of them.
She is (was) a schoolteacher, meaning Monday through Friday she could not care for them from 6AM until 3PM (and always waits until 4 or 5 to pick them up anyway). If FDH and I weren't around to watch them M, W, F then they'd spend 6 to 4 in daycare five days a week. On the other hand, between FDH and I, we could watch them pretty much 24/7 even if we had them full time. I don't see anything in any of this that suggests should be the primary caretaker except possibly her vagina.
You know what always gets me,
You know what always gets me, where do they find the time! I was a single Mom for a long time and was too busy with work, kids, sports and MY life to stalk anyone, now that BF lives with me I am even more busy with work, kids, sports, MY life,My man and the skids when we were seeing them. Here I thought High School was over!
I'm pretty sure she actually
I'm pretty sure she actually just quit and did not get fired. She's worked there for quite a while but apparently did not like it because the other teachers didn't eat up to the whole victimization act.
The funny thing is that she is STILL sending the kids to daycare from 7AM until 4PM. That's 9 hours! She is absolutely not and has never been a stay at home mom. In fact, besides every other weekend, she only sees them for about four hours a day. They count her as the primary caretaker because they sleep at her house, but we have them for 70 more hours than she does (every month) if you're counting when the kids are actually awake. She picks them up from us every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 4 or 5 depending on how she's feeling. Her weekends are Friday at 4PM until Monday at 7AM. Our weekends are Friday at 7AM until TUESDAY at 7AM. I do not understand how they could give her primary caretaker when we are the ones who take care of them whenever they are awake (and we're more than willing to let them sleep here). All she does is feed them dinner (usually corn dogs) and put them to bed. That's it.
How the heck did custody get like this? It's so sexist. My FDH is a better parent than BM. He's a better parent than I am! He cooks, cleans, coaches, handles school stuff, cuddles the kids, disciplines the kids . . . Everything. I just don't understand how a super-parent could get screwed like this.
hahahah - the courts in my
hahahah - the courts in my state could care less if BM is working! I personally think if you're not going to work to support your kids...and set a good example for your kids - you should not be the primary caretaker. It's bullsh*t. Why should BM get to sit on her ass all day while kids are in school...and just collect CS...when it doesn't get spent on the kids anyway? The whole court system is ridiculous and a joke. Don't even go back to court - you are going to get screwed over. She's not working...his CS will go up...I would however contact someone at Domestics if I were your SO and get a lawyer - the time you have with the kids needs to be added up- here if the one who pays CS has the kids 183 days out of the year - your CS is cut in half...you need to check out all little details - this "where the kids sleep" is crap too. I would love to go into the courts and say - "Where they sleep?" Yeah it may be at BM's but uh - they share a twin bed...an 8 and 6 year old because their BM keeps putting them in diapers to sleep and they've pee'd one bed so bad they have to share one!" DISGUSTING.
Unfortuneatly the CP can
Unfortuneatly the CP can pretty much do what they want as far as employment is concerned. A CP has no CS judgement against them like the NCP tends to have so your SKid's BM will likely have no repercussions for quiting her job.
A Judge can impute income based on her earning potential but can not force her to get a job and there is no potential civil or criminal liabilities for a CP like there is for an NCP who does not pay CS as ordered.
Good luck with the custody attempt.