I agree with you. I don't call my skids any names, I don't think they deserve it. I would google step mom forum and see what you get ok.

Off hand I don't know of any. Maybe some of the other posters will know of some. Of course you could always google 'Step-parenting' and see what comes up.

While there are some very heated vent sessions that go on here, I think the vast majority of SM's here are actually quite tolerant and do go the extra mile with their SK's. If there are posts that make you uncomfortable, it's best to just ignore them and look for less negative ones. There is a certain level of frustration that comes along with this role and b/c of this, there is a lot of surface anger that may not be warm and fuzzy all the time. Then again, this is a place to vent. Many of us have BM's from hell. I know I do. Many of us have entitled, spoiled, and disrespectful SK's to deal with. Many have 'guilty daddy' husbands who refuse to do the right thing when it comes to parenting their children, which makes the SK's even worse to deal with on a day by day basis. We didn't expect to be waging war in our own homes with children who have been systematically taught to be difficult by PAS-ing BM's or poor parenting skills by both parents. This place gives us an outlet to get the anger/frustration out of our systems so that we don't take it out on the SK's or our spouses/SO's. You don't have to like it, you just have to understand where it's coming from.

If you decide to leave, I wish you luck in looking for a place where step-parenting is a bed of roses and rainbows shine everyday. Cuz that doesn't happen in our day to day lives. JMHO.

Ivillage is worse. There are others on Cafemom. But, as for calling kids names. I try not to do much more than manipulative when refering to SD. But, there are some here that do. I have issues with the ones that ask the Dads to make a choice. I have tried hard not to do that in my situation. He can have a relationship with SD just don't ask me to.

Just ignore the ones you don't like and make a comment shaming a poster if you feel they are too harsh. Sometimes we get so frustrated and need a place to vent. Just because someone says it harshly on here, doesn't mean they are doing it in the "real world".

I like this forum in some ways, but there are some horrible names thrown around. I have tried looking for others without much luck. I get frustrated sometimes with my skids but I love them and would never had married my DH if I didn't

Why stir the pot by asking for suggestions on for other step forums while verbally spanking the smoms here at the same time?Why not just use google and move on?What is the point of the whole sista preacha blog about it??Does that really help anyone?No.It doesn't.Learn to google and so long.

Bye!!!

probably the same way you came across this site you will find other sites.However as you know Step parenting isn't easy and everyone's level of frustration vary as well as how ppl choose to vent. I would think in most scenarios this is the ONLY place that one can come and possibly call a rude, ill behaved, manipulative, sneaky skid out of their name...probably you will run into the same thing somewhere else. It is always an option to bypass those post that make you uncomfortable.

I for one did not and do not feel the need to love a man's kids in order to be with him it clearly would make the transition smoother but isn't always realistic or a requirement.

Whateva

Come on, I read about some of you pulling this passive aggressive BS with your SOs and Skids every day. Talk about pot calling the kettle black.

OP, if you can't look past the few over-the-top negative posters, use google as suggested and move on.

Posters, y'all can be a surly bunch sometimes, it certainly doesn't hurt to have someone hold the mirror up once and a while.

Now let's all hug and be friends, "Kumbya!"

She's been a member for three days and not posted any blogs. Seems to me that if she spent those three days looking around, and decided this wasn't the forum for her, that she'd just move on. Or at least that's what I would have done.

Or maybe after looking around, she saw that there was some really useful advice, but was hoping there were less venting? Maybe she thought that some of us use this site for venting, but another site for less heated discussions?

Why ask us? We're the evil ones. That's just stupid.

I'm guessing our responses are exactly what you expected. Hmmmm.

LOL I just love you guys...you so make me smile and laugh

And that is what I need now. See the OP does not realize that some of us have been at this for YEARS!! Breaking points? We are entitled to vent....and better we do it here than rip the skids head off IRL. ...Just sayin...

Are we really entitled to vent? You are kidding me, right? I thought that it was against the law for a stepmother to vent her feelings out... :?

My sense of humor is what gets me through my life, and I intend to keep it no matter how dry and sarcastic it may be.

LOL too funny!! I love this site are you kidding me; and if I come across something that I don't like - I just go to another one.......If you can't come here and call someone a name; where can you go!! And yes they are "fer*s sometimes........so are my BK and so am I......LOL get a sense of humor. }:) }:) }:)

Aren't we all?

I must admit, when I first started reading here, I was shocked at some of the things that were said, but thought about it and guess what? A Lot of the SMs here had the courage to say the EXACT things that I had been thinking but couldn't say.

I have posted things that I wouldn't dare repeat in our home, in front of skids, bio-kids or in front of DH. I have always felt better after getting my feelings out to people who understand and WILL NOT judge me or walk away with the hurt feelings that the people in my home would.

If this isn't the place for you, by all means find another site, but to put those of us who openly share our feelings in a safe place is just as bad as what we are doing.

Good luck in your search to find a site that better suites your needs, I will however tell you, there is NOT a step parent in this world who does NOT get upset, mad, pissed off or frustrated beyond belief and they find a site to VENT their frustrations so it will NOT always be pretty

i'm kinda looking for a site that has posts from the skids point of view...

i found it kind of amusing that i put up a post about finally getting granted child support, and more than half the group "jumped me" for it.

but that's what happens here on the net, ppl know what you want them to know about them and this website is "fuel" for anger.

but glad to know that i'm not alone in my feelings

don't talk bad about any smom's you know, you might get mobbed for it

Cafemom.com has many groups with varying "venting" types allowed. Some police ALOT!!

I like it here because SM's don't need to walk on egg-shells. Even as a BM you must feel like you want to pull your hair out over different situations & having a place to vent definately helps.

I have to say though that since most of us that use these forums weren't dealt perfect hands as far as our family goes (whether step or bio), most forums you will come across will have venting...at least it's online & not to the Skids/kids but rather to strangers on a supportive forum where one can get HELPFUL advice or JOKING advice on any/most circumstances! Advice & humor out of "Black, ugly, soul-searing hatred" really isn't bad & tends to lighten at least, my personal mood.

Glad you have a blended family that is perfect. Glad you have family in your life that never hurt you so badly you feel like you are bleeding emotionally. Glad you aren't stabbed in the back by those you are giving your all too. Glad you don't have SKids who have been abandoned...thus leaving them with wounds so deep it affects everyone they meet. Glad you don't have a BM who makes your life a living hell...not all of us are that lucky...I personally don't appreciate the judgement coming from you! I get enough of that at home thank you very much!

See ya in a year...if you stay. This site is awesome. DH & BM would have preferred me to cater to skids vs. realize the delight and freedom of disengaging. After all: "I work full-time (i.e. have income/benefits and NEITHER of them do) & knew what I was getting into marrying an guy with twins".

This should be our safe site. I have it easy compared to some of these ladies and let me tell you I have respect for all of them.

Some of the step mom's on this forum are in incredibly difficult situations. Their parenting their skids, and it is like tying their shoes with their hands behind their backs.

You ladies rock and I learn and grow everyday from reading your blogs and comments.

If you need to vent, so be it. If it makes you feel better to call the skids ***!!!#### so be it.

We are not hear to police each other but to help and sometimes just listen.

end of sermon!

http://www.revolutionhealth.com/groups/step-parents-support/discussions

Not a bad one. I was one of the early members and a moderator on this site until I became a Stalker. The founder unfortunately got divorced and things petered out. Not too active these days but you may find it fits you better.

If not, iVillage is the way to go for you I think.

i have not been on here long but i haven't seen anyone call skids terrible names. yeah i seen brats and things like that but i would call my own daughter a brat if she acted like one. my boyfrinds son is 3 and he is autistic so i know what u r going through it is ht ard. i have read posts however that complained about the skids being hungry and that i thought was kinda extreme but other than that i have gotten some good advice and also read stories that make me thankful for mine.

LOL....I LOVE this site.

Never before have I been able to talk (write) and be told point-blank what people think. It's refreshingly honest (and okay, sometimes brutal) but it's REAL.

There is such a good mix of people that post here and on days when I think I should just give up, that I must be a horrible step-mother, and that this turmoil is going to have a lasting negative affect on all the children involved....then I read either a post a lifts my spirits and gives me the courage to keep going....OR....I read a post that shocks me and I think "Well, I'm not THAT bad yet" and I feel better. LOL

In fact, this site is now my ammunition! Although my husband hasn't read anything here, he knows I write/read. Kudos to the poster who asked "Would you do this again?" and then all the posters who responded. The statistics are hard to ignore and I said as much to my husband. I think I scared him a little...lol. He actually came to me and had a sincere talk about changing his parenting ways. Now.....whether he actually does it or not, will be a different story.

Stay tuned for the next eposide of "These are the days of our step-parenting lives..."

You could try www.dailystrength.org. That site is for ANY issue you have, not just step parenting. I hope that helps. Also I read alot of the step parenting articles on www.familylife.com. I am going to attend a seminar in April on Successful Step families. I found it on their site.

wow... I just joined this and my first observation was that people were at least HONEST on here. Personally, if something seems to "offensive" to me, I just wont post on it. Vent away.