To make a long story short, my mother-in-law told me that my 25 years old SD has been talking bad about me. She called me a phony, and said that I talk nice on the phone but I am mean among other things. My husband was never married to her mother. They were young parents. I have treated her like a daughter for the 21 years that I have known her. I thought things were okay between us. I told my husband and he is upset but don't know how to address this. She even said a few things about her dad. Here is the hard part; my mother-in-law doesn't want me to say anything. My SD has had a strained relationship with her biological mother for years on. So, I have always tried to be there for her as much as possible. We live in different states now. She had a baby recently and I still sent the baby a gift only to find out that she belittled what I had gotten the baby. She told me that it was perfect. I have continued to try to communicate. But it is hard knowing these things. My relationship with my mother-in-law isn't the same. I feel like she should have stood up for me. Or, was she a willing participant in the conversation. By the way, my husband and I have three children together. I know that this wasn't so short afterall. I am new to the forum. Pleas help!
p.s.
When she is mad at her mother she calls crying on my shoulder. I never say anything bad about her "real" mother. I always try to help her see things positive.