happy effing b-day @%$^&*&$^#%$#*&&%^$

my b-day yesterday was pleasant - until i got home.

f*ck my life.

dh starts telling me how $#!tty his day was. he got up to go to his childhood home one last time. went to leave, had a flat tire. pulled out the small air compressor to fill it just enough to get to the service station - hole in the air hose. was able to fill it juuust a hair. pumped gas, went in and paid and got change for the air machine. turned the engine over, put it in gear, and some $#!thead pulls in, blocks the air machine, and goes in to play the lottery machines for lord knows how long. so that's how his day started.

then he tells me the insurance adjuster finally showed up. seems they'll fix the siding and soffit that the recent bad storms blew off, but they won't touch any of the water damage. he stated that it is not due to storms/rain, but faulty construction. so i guess we'll start using the basement steps once the effing porch collapses...

then i get an email from the bank. our appraisal report came in. it was 22k LESS than what we needed. so we can pay off HALF the credit cards, IF that, and have nothing left for the house. if we choose to go that route. dh is not happy with that option and is wanting to declare bankruptcy.

THEN he starts a stupid argument with me. kaos gives dog #2 a bath, towels him off, and ties him out back with me to dry off. after 10 or 15 minutes, dog #2 comes around and sits at the back door. i let him in. dh comes out and says "why the f*ck did you let him in, he's still wet!" i told him i didn't realize it, i figured he'd be dry. he says "you'd have crawled kaos' @$$ if HE had let him in, but it's ok for YOU to." and storms off.

later on, he starts on me again about the towel the dog was dried with. kaos had asked me prior to bathing the dog. dh *thought* he heard part of the conversation, actually he swore up and down what he heard was right. he was wrong. so i go and get kaos, and he verified my version.

THEN dh keeps on with his crap, saying that i was putting a child in the middle, he *knows* what he heard was right, and now he's question every single time in the past that kaos and i took opposite sides and dh backed me up. cuz he KNOWS what he heard.

F*CKING REALLY? so yeah, happy effing b-day to me. i went to bed upset and crying. have no idea what time dh came to bed. my eyes are all puffy and red. at least the girls here at the office got me a cake and bought my lunch.

Tuff Noogies's blog
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Sounds like a crappy day to

Sounds like a crappy day to me too. Sorry you had to deal with so much!

Re the house, is it new construction or older? I am wondering if there would be any use in appealing the insurance company decision by having your own "expert" come in and look at the situation. If you never have had any water damage before... or the water damage previously was hidden (like behind a wall or in a ceiling) then your policy may still have to cover the damage.

We recently went through a wringer with an ins co in FL due to the storm last fall. We had to bring in a "public adjuster" to help us settle things with the insurance company. Suffice it to say that our initial prospects of getting a settlement were poor.. and we ended up with almost 20K and were allowed funds to replace a roof that had obviously seen better days before the storm.

Even if it was not built perfectly, if you had never had a leak then the storm was of sufficient severity to cause the damage. Unless it wasn't to code (or the code at the time of building it), they obviously had no problem taking your money to insure that part of the home.. so they should cover it right? It's not like they excluded the porch from the value they charged premiums on!

You don't have to take "no" for an answer.

it was built in 2003. we

it was built in 2003. we have lived here for 2 1/2 years. the rotting wood is behind the siding and soffit areas.

thank you for the information, that is VERY helpful. i'll let dh know (when i feel like talking to him, which i don't feel like it right now). i don't know that it wasn't up to code, i think it may simply be a crappy design flaw where they went for appearance instead of function but still up to code.

The fact that it may not have

The fact that it may not have been a perfect design doesn't mean that they shouldn't cover it. If you had no visible means of noticing that the damage was there, they should cover the damage. If there are obvious external signs that were ignored (staining and rot etc).. they will say that you should have maintained it better. BUT, you may be able to prove that the wind force and amount of rain made the difference. Maybe they will pay for some of it.

It's like if you have a leaking pipe in a wall. You don't know it's there until you see the visible proof on your wall or ceiling and by then the damage may be pretty big.

If you have a policy, you should try to read to see whether it covers things that are hidden.

Sometimes they may pay for part of something too. They only covered 1/2 of one part of our ceiling work because their inspector thought some staining was older.

Overall, you shouldn't accept the first offer.. but you should be able to be paid on "agreed" damages.. ie damages that you both agree are there. They CAN pay you a partial claim. Just be clear to them that by accepting some payment.. doesn't mean that you are accepting that as your final answer.

You may even be able to get someone to come inspect and give you a report for free because you will let them do the work when the claim is paid.

Also, be very careful with "public adjusters and insurance claim assistance companies" They usually are paid a % of the claim. You will want to exclude any initial offer from what they get paid on and don't let them trick you into paying any more than 10% of any NEW money they might get for you!

Me too. It's mine today and

Me too. It's mine today and SO didn't say anything about it. Little hurt, not gonna lie... he knows it's May 3, I think he forgot May 3 is today. We'll see when he gets home.

Ugh - I am sorry your day was

Ugh - I am sorry your day was shitty and I am super mad that your husband was such a douche!!

thanks WOB. i'm consoling

thanks WOB. i'm consoling myself with cake for breakfast.

he was (obviously and with good reason) pissed off at the world and imho, in looking for a way to avoid thinking about the real issues, took that pissy-ness out on me. no excuse for it, but i do understand. i'm still cranky as h3ll tho' at him and still didn't feel like talking to him this morning. GRRRRRRRRR.

Cake for breakfast is the

Cake for breakfast is the best!!!

I get that he's pissed at the world, I really do, and it does sound like he had a shitty day yesterday, but he needs to keep that shit away from you, especially on your birthday!! A person can have a shitty day and not take it out on the one person in the world who loves him most!!

Financial stress makes for a

Financial stress makes for a very unhappy home. I am so sorry your husband blew up on you xx

i love alton. i miss his

i love alton. i miss his good eats show - i find the science behind things fascinating! i'm also totally hooked in america's test kitchen and cook's country. the chefs/hosts are "different", certainly not there to entertain like the ones on food network, but what you can learn about technique and ingredients and science in one episode alone is amazing.

I love The Great British

I love The Great British Baking Show.

So sorry Tuff! I am one of

So sorry Tuff!

I am one of those people who always cries on my birthday LOL. Even as a kid. I don't like birthdays. This year I did it right and planned a mini getaway birthday weekend, granted it was with the skids, but I was too focused on that to give a crap about the day - I just went and enjoyed the weekend. The less expectation - the better!

A big happy birthday from me to you. Be easy on yourself.

Tuff, I'm sorry your DH was

Tuff, I'm sorry your DH was such a butthead. WTH did he overreact??

Anyhoo, I also like the idea of the do-over birthday. Go for it! You deserve it and your DH needs to serve up some Humble Pie!!!

P.S.
Got any more of that Tres Leche cake? Nom nom nom...
Or I could go home, open up a can of Sweetened Condensed Milk, and start spooning it up...