SS14 is figuring out that his BM2 is a bit shady
He is starting to ask questions that DH and I are struggling to answer neutrally.
BM2 has been here since Sunday the 18th and she didn't pick him up until yesterday morning, the 22nd.
On Tuesday, DH took SS with him to the store. While in the car, they had the following conversation, initiated by SS:
SS - Why isn't my mum picking me up until Thursday?
DH - I don't know mate.
SS - She's been here since SUNDAY!
DH - I don't know buddy, but at least you get to see your mum, right?
SS - Yeah, I guess. You don't get to see your mum anymore, do you Dad?
DH - No I don't.
SS - Dad...I know that if it was you coming to pick me up, you would've met me at the school gates today, wouldn't you (last day of school before Christmas break)
DH - Yes I would have mate, even if I had to take a bus or train.
SS - But mum won't. ......I love you dad.
DH sent a text to BM2 saying that SS knows you're already here and very disappointed that you haven't picked him up yet. Can't you come get him now? No response.
BM2 is then going to drop SS back to us Christmas Eve MORNING as she is literally going partying with one of her old friends. She is going to some "high class" pub/bar/club hoping to find some lonely, sad, rich man she can dig her money-grubbing claws into. Literally...as she had been asking where a good place was to go to meet men.
So SS asked me before she came here to pick him up yesterday what BM2 was doing for Christmas and why won't he be with her? I said I don't know, maybe you can ask her when you're with her. I can't tell him that money and getting her whore hole stuffed are more important than he is.
Guessing he'll figure out soon, though...
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Comments
I feel so sorry for your SS
I feel so sorry for your SS but at least he knows he has one loving parent and stepmom
That's sad Cookie.
That's sad Cookie.
(No subject)
That's a shame. You know
That's a shame. You know sometimes I wish skids would realize what a waste of space their BM is, but your post makes think that's just selfish on my part. When they really do figure it out it's sad.
It's disgusting and so
It's disgusting and so freaking sad. I suppose it's better than him putting her on a false pedestal. The truth hurts but lies are even worse. I don't know. It just sucks all the way around.
My SD is 5 and starting to
My SD is 5 and starting to figure it out. BM makes all kinds of promises to see her/be there for her than doesn't. SD was with BM a couple months ago and I guess BM promised to come up on her birthday and spend time with her and whatever else. She lives 5 hours away and has NEVER came up to visit. We bring SD to her. On her birthday, she called and asked BM why she wasn't here when she promised she'd be here. BM made all kinds of excuses when in reality, she didn't have any plans to come for her birthday, she never did. She just said she would and didn't think anything of lying to SD.
After they got off the phone, SD said "I don't want mommy here anyways" on the verge of tears. Most of the time I'm torn... I want SD to decide for herself what kind of relationship she wants with BM but I also want BM out of the picture permanently because it's us who have to deal with the hurt she causes time and time again. It sucks.
I often wonder if it would be
I often wonder if it would be better if she'd just give up all together. At least then he'd stop having any hope or expectations.
That is sad. My niece was
That is sad.
My niece was quite young when she figured out that alcohol was more important to her dad than she was. Then she found out, that it was more important to her own mother (my sister), also. She asked me why she wasn't enough. What's a person supposed to say to that?
I don't honestly know. It is
I don't honestly know. It is completely heart breaking
"She asked me why she wasn't
"She asked me why she wasn't enough."
You tell her she is enough, she is more than enough. It's her parents that aren't up to par. They are the ones who lack the ability to see anything good, her included, they only see alcohol.
You can, if you think it will make her feel better, tell her the whole it's a disease and they aren't responsible but I personally don't agree with that.
your lucky your ss14 is
your lucky your ss14 is figuring this out.
Please don't sugar coat BM2 in any way.
By far the worst advise that is given out over the past 15-20 years is DONT say anything to a child. Don't say anything bad about a parent.
Why is it assumed the truth is bad to be told.
Big regret for my husband and I
I won't do it. I won't say
I won't do it. I won't say anything good but won't say anything bad either. I keep encouraging him to ask her why it's this or why she won't do that. I am putting the burden of truth on her and never will it ever be said that I led him in the wrong direction. Whether she believes it or not, I don't give two farts. SS will never hear anything from me.
DH though will explain all one day. That's his decision. Dog help SS upon learning the truth.
He was the miracle child as
He was the miracle child as well. BM2 was told since she was of childbearing age that she would never be able to conceive, let alone carry to full term. Then SS was born much to their surprise yet delight. BM2 only cares about herself though so the delight never lasted long for her. Even as an infant, DH took care of him most of the time once he stopped breastfeeding.
It is true that I'm not a fan of SS sometimes but he is a pain in the arse teenager. Never would I ever wish that his own biological mother not take an interest in him. I cannot wrap my head around it. A Michael Buble cover act at the old pub her and DH used to go to in the area they used to live in...that is what is more important than SS14. She hasn't spent Christmas with him in 5 years but it doesn't matter.
It makes so mad and sad for SS14.
Ah yes, but as soon as that
Ah yes, but as soon as that baby cuteness wears off....
My sister had my niece because she "wanted to do the right thing" (as opposed to having an abortion). What she forgot was, it is a life long commitment, at least 18 years legally. Parenthood doesn't just stop when you are tired of it. Oh wait, for some, it does.
Just drop them off on the
Just drop them off on the father's doorstep. Poof, responsibility over. Everyone will still need to worship the Golden Uterus. Especially the father...only for all of eternity though. Plus he MUST do all the raising and pay for everything forever. After all, she carried for nine months and gave birth. That is contribution enough!
Oh, Cooooookies, poor SS ---
Oh, Cooooookies, poor SS --- yet how wonderful that he appreciates DH & you.