Christmas with an ungrateful step-daughter that barely acknowledges my existence.

For the last 5 years I’ve always given my step children the exact $$$$ I’ve given my own children for birthdays and Christmas. About 3 years ago my step daughter was rude to me and I spoke to my wife about it. My wife acknowledges that she could be a b***h. It kills me to give her anything for her birthday or Christmas but I do for my wife sake. Am I sending the wrong message by giving her anything? When I try to strike up a conversation with her the responses are for the most either YES or NO. Do I continue giving the $$$? I do not believe in rewarding bad behavior by giving $$$. Should I be honest with my wife and just tell her I’m not giving her anything until she but this incident behind us?

terrykirby55's blog
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My wife tells me I should not

My wife tells me I should not give her anything, but I think deep down it would hurt my wife. Anyway Her Son is such a perfect gentlemen. We get along wonderfully!!!

If my SD was a b#tch towards

If my SD was a b#tch towards me I would not feel bad in the slightest not giving her anything. Bad behavior should not be rewarded and you wouldn't be teaching her anything good about how to treat people.

Thanks for your support, I

Thanks for your support, I just wonder how my wife would really feel about it when I don't give her anything. Even though she told me I would not give her anything. I think deep down it would hurt. It's funny before this incident I was her go to person when she got into life little jams.

Not sure how I'm going to do

Not sure how I'm going to do it but I have to tell my wife that I'm not giving her daughter anything until she treats me like a human being. I believe she will agree with me but I have to believe deep down it must hurt even a little.

And she acknowledges that.

And she acknowledges that. Her Son is such the perfect Gentlemen, When he visits he makes sure he says hello to EVERYONE. She walks into our home thinking she the QUEEN. Prior to this incident, I was her go to person when she had a problem.

I would ask yourself "how

I would ask yourself "how would it make me feel" I for one cant do things out of spite or retaliation. For example we all took my stepdaughter out for her 22nd birthday. A SD who has nothing to do with us, doesnt return calls or texts, or drop by and visit but yet DH wanted to do this wonderful dinner for her. Easily cost us $300 (there were 8 of us) plus $100 cash in a bday card. I contemplated all week long whether or not I would attend. Not deserving at all if you ask me. But the day comes, I got dressed and went. Because I knew how I would feel if I didnt. It didnt matter to me how husband would feel or SD would feel. But how I would feel and I knew I would feel like shit if I didnt go.

How would I feel, Wouldn't

How would I feel, Wouldn't bother me in least. It would upset my wife more than it would bother me. I've tried to mend the relationship, but my wife told me her can hold a grudge forever. Sometimes I think it kills her to say Thank You when I give her the gifts.

as soon as Aergia started

as soon as Aergia started disrespecting me I stopped buying gifts - any sort of gift, I do not even wish her well on her birthday or for Christmas, I simply ignore her... like she does me for the whole year

Thanks for your support and

Thanks for your support and understanding. There are only two people I have to take any bullshit from and they never give me any. I just hate taking any bullshit from a 21yr old kid that I only been good to.

One time a gave her a bag of

One time a gave her a bag of dog food for their dog for a Birthday Present. I like their dog.

lol one year i got oss a

lol one year i got oss a hannah montana button set for a stocking stuffer }:) }:) }:)

I get treated like a second

I get treated like a second class citizen as well from SD's but really only do for them when it is asked of me by DW due to the request being outside her abilities or time constraints, except of course my daily providing of food shelter and what not. I have often considered asking SD 18 what she thinks would happen if DW were to pass away, does she think I would continue to care for her or kick her unappreciative but out the door, but I've never done that.

Seriously!!!!

Both SDs were rude last

Both SDs were rude last Christmas, and esp. SD12 who made it clear it was not about what the gifts were but how many there were.

I was done.

I have totally cut back my gift giving for birthdays (a card and a moderate gift card) and this holiday I let DH know I was going to only give one reasonable gift to open and one moderate gift card each. It won't break my bank and if they complain, I'll take 'em back.

I'll cook, wrap his gifts, decorate, bake but I'm done with gifts.