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Update - DH and ASS and the return of the eletronica

WalkOnBy's picture

After dinner last night, DH and I were sitting on the couch watching "Drunk History." No, it wasn't me, drunk, explaining some historical minutiae - lol!!

He said that he had come up with a new plan for the return of ASS's phone and computer. I said, "mmm hhmm." He said that he wanted ASS to "do something" in exchange for the stuff. I said, "mmmm hmmm." He said that he wanted ASS to clean up his floor - see the pictures in the link below - and submit a minimum of 2 applications a week, print them off and show them to DH AND take the SEO certification class that he and ASS talked about last week. I said, "hmmm, you DO realize that the minute you attach conditions, he will say no, right?"

DH said, "yes, but I need to do this so that he can't say I did nothing to help him." I said, "good to hear that. Have you heard an answer yet?" DH said, "I emailed him, and he's been at the library since school got out. Haven't heard back yet." I said, "mmm hmmm."

A while later, as we were laying in bed, we heard the garage door open signaling the return of ASS. DH got up, and said he was going downstairs to see what ASS had to say about the proposal. I said, "mmm hmmm." Not two minutes later, DH walked back in to our bedroom. I said, "that was fast."

"Yeah, he hadn't read the email yet."

"mmmm hmmmm."

and, so it goes.

Comments

WalkOnBy's picture

I love that my favorite actors (and others) are in it.

There is one that has Dave Grohl in it! I MUST find it and watch it.

I looooooooooooove Dave Grohl. Went to a wedding where he was a guest once.

WalkOnBy's picture

He is my celebrity pass, as well.

I have seen the Foos twice.

When I was dating Mr. AbusiveAsshole after my divorce, he was friends with a prominent business man in my area. This business man got married. For the third time. To a yoga instructor he met while he was vacationing with wife #2 in California. Mr. AbusiveAsshole and I went to the wedding.

We are sitting out by the pool during the cocktail hour. I looked over across the pool and saw Dave Grohl. Swear to Dog. I said to the people I was with, "why is Dave Grohl here?" While most of them had no idea who I was talking about (I was in my 30s and they were all in their 50s), Mr. AbusiveAsshole did and told me I was wrong and what was I thinking and be quiet and blah blah blah.

I got up and headed toward the bar. On the way, I stopped at Dave Grohl's table and said, "you're Dave Grohl, aren't you? I wish to hell that you were a little bit older so that I could have sung covers of Foo Fighters songs in my college band. I do a mean "Times Like These."

He looked at me and said, "aside from the bride and groom, I bet you're the only person who knows who I am in this place." Which of course, led me to ask exactly WHY he was here?

The bride was his wife's best friend and their yoga instructor. Of course she was. He introduced me to his wife and I went on my merry way.

At the height of the reception, Dave got up to sing for the bride and groom. He was wrong, about 40 people knew who he was, because we were all rushing the tent - me included.

yep - I got to sing a verse of "Times Like These" with Dave Grohl. And his acoustic guitar.

Best. Moment. Of. My. Life - and I have had some AWESOME brushes with celebrities. This one topped them all and will never be topped.

I, I'm a new day rising
I'm a brand new sky
To hang the stars upon tonight
I am a little divided
Do I stay or run away
And leave it all behind?

WalkOnBy's picture

I know, and I was soooooooooooooo disappointed. To be fair, it was in a smelly club, but he did smell.

He was still really freaking hot, though.

NoWireCoatHangarsEVER's picture

Oh my gosh Walk on BY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was worthy it to date it Mr. AbusiveASSHOLE for that experience!!!!!!! oh you lucky duck!

WalkOnBy's picture

No, no it was not. Not even a little bit.

almost 10 years of my life wasted on that prick.

In other news, I can now host a seder, so I guess there's that??

WalkOnBy's picture

he was incredibly cool - he has been back to Detroit several times to donate musical instruments and other needed supplies to the remarkably underfunded and craptastic Detroit Public Schools.

He signed a cloth napkin for Thing1 - and it is framed and hanging on the wall in Thing1's apartment.

LOL!

NoWireCoatHangarsEVER's picture

Stillneedtovent's nephew as ODD. I swear ASS has ODD. I think a lot of the stepkids we talk about on this site has ODD. What happens to these kids when they grow up and have bosses. I'm guessing they can't hold jobs very long or have successfully relationships with girls because of the Oppositional Defiance Disorder.

WalkOnBy's picture

I think he does, too. He hasn't been formally diagnosed, but he certainly fits all the criteria in the DSM, that's for sure.

lintini's picture

Akkkk :sick:

Cover1W's picture

Man, I should have taken pictures of SD12s room.
Hers beats this by a MILE.
And it smells now.
And she lied to my face about cleaning something up this weekend.

I told DP last night what happened, and said, "She does NOT get to lie to me. She may get away with it with you, but not Cover. If you do not take care of that room tomorrow, and that includes going through her dresser drawers and closet - everything - I will take care of it myself when I get home tomorrow."

Line in the sand drawn.
I'm done with it. My house, my responsibility...if kid isn't made responsible, I'll take it over and no one will like it.
The trash bags for EVERYTHING not in it's place are at the ready.

over step's picture

Puke's floor looks worse than that in a matter of a couple hours and DH says nothing until she has to clean it before she leaves. Not to mention it smells like a ashtray with cigarette butts left in drawers.

hereiam's picture

Well, your DH is trying to give ASS options and get him moving in some direction, so that's good. When ASS walks out the door, your DH can know he tried.

Oh, that room! I bet you will be sooooo glad to get him out of there!

WalkOnBy's picture

And that is the only reason that I half assedly support DH in this quest - I want him to be able to say that he did everything he could and that ASS refused to participate.

If the slob were my kid, I would go in with gloves and a breathing mask and throw EVERYTHING away.

But it's not my kid and I have absolutely zero f**cks to give when it comes to ASS.

robin333's picture

Would you be wearing leather or lace with that riding crop? I just can't picture one without the other.

WalkOnBy's picture

"If you don't like your life, then change it.
You're not a tree."

No, seriously, that's what it says.

robin333's picture

Okay... the next poet laureate has spoken. Lol.

I'm so evil, I would incorporate the "you're not a tree" into every conversation in my home.

robin333's picture

Oh, I know Smile

I'd use it when DH is talking about ASS. Example:

DH: I'm considering giving ASS his electronics so he can have the tools to get a job and training.
Me: Mmm, I understand dear. After all, he's not a tree.

Like I said, I'm feeling evil today.

hereiam's picture

I was wondering about the sign on the monitor, myself, I can only read the first line.

Sweet T's picture

Omg, I am sorry but a child who treats his room like that doesn't deserve the electronicsame back.

I do not know how you don't go off on your husband. How many, I just want to know I have my nasty display respectful child all the million chances he can puss away so I do not have to feel guilty... I could take.

WalkOnBy's picture

For the most part, I am a "close the door" kind of parent.

However, if this were MY kid, I would be in that room in a heartbeat and EVERYTHING that was on the floor would be gone gone gone.

notsurehowtodeal's picture

Don't forget narcotics for pain. I have a stash left over from surgeries and keep them for the eminent Zombie Apocalypse. I also have flashlights in every room and a huge stock of candles.

I live where it is not uncommon for people to get stuck in their cars during the winter. I have a bag full of "survival items" which includes magazines and a book. If I'm stranded I am not going to get bored!

WalkOnBy's picture

Oh yes, it does.....including my engagement to Asshat. met him in college. In the 80s.

I looooooooooooved the 80s. Best years of my life Smile

notsurehowtodeal's picture

I have a "bit of a past" and most of it was during the 80's. Occasionally a detail will slip out and my DH will usually respond with slide long glance. I answer with "it was the 80's - what did you expect?"

WalkOnBy's picture

Me too-I was a bit of a wild child in my teenage and early adult years. My husband, who I knew in high school, was very straightlaced.

Every now and again a detail will pop out, usually when we're listening to the radio, and he just looks at me and shakes his head.

notasm3's picture

You people that went through the 80s are amateurs. Smile I came of age in the 60s in age of flower power and free love. I lived in London in 1970. Jimi Hendrix died in my hotel the night I checked in.