Learned THAT lesson

The road to hell is truly paved with good intentions.

Yesterday, I was at the grocery and on a whim, decided to get stuff to make Easter baskets for Karate Kid and BabyVoice.

DH was so happy when I took the assembled baskets up to our room to hide them. He was just so damn happy.

This morning, I woke up around 7 and took the baskets downstairs. Around 8:30 I went back downstairs to start making breakfast.

About an hour after that DH told the skids that there were Easter baskets for them downstairs. I was in the kitchen making my cheesy potatoes for dinner tonight.

Both skids came downstairs, looked at the baskets, said nothing, picked them up and turned to walk back upstairs. I said, " you know, when people give you things, it's polite to say thank you."

They said nothing and DH barked at them about being rude and how I took the time to make the baskets and blah blah blah. They then said thank you to me, but this time it was me who said nothing.

DH apologized on their behalf. I told him that I adore him, but his kids are rude and even though I knew it made him happy, I won't be worrying about gifts or holiday stuff for the skids anymore.

Ingrates.

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Absolutely incredible. My SD

Absolutely incredible.

My SD is the same way. Now, I know that my SD24 is introverted, kind of timid, a little shy, but FFS, I have been in her life since she was FIVE years old. Is saying, "Thank You," to me really that.fucking.hard?

Yup -DH always chalks it up

Yup -DH always chalks it up to "being shy."

I call bullshit-I've been on the scene for seven years. And, I don't care how shy you are, if someone gives you something, you say thank you.

Sheesh. That was so nice of

Sheesh. That was so nice of you. Rude skids are the worst.

And please share your cheesy potato recipe

One large bag of frozen

One large bag of frozen hashbrowns, shredded
One cup of sour cream
2 cups of your favorite shredded cheese
Four green onions, sliced
Salt, pepper and paprika to taste.

Defrost the shredded hashbrowns in your fridge overnight. When you're ready to make the potatoes, mix the bag of shredded hashbrowns, the sour cream, and one cup of cheese in a large bowl. Add salt and pepper to taste.

Pour them into a 9 x 13 pan that has been greased. Place the sliced green onions on top, cover with the rest of the cheese, and put the paprika on top of the cheese.

Place them in a 350° oven for about 35 minutes-or until the edges get crispy and the cheese is bubbly.

(No subject)

Thanks WOB. I'll be making

Thanks WOB. I'll be making this tomorrow.

does it come out anything

does it come out anything like cracker barrel's hashbrown casserole?

if so, i'm totally making this!!!

Yep - tastes a whole lot like

Yep - tastes a whole lot like Cracker Barrel's.

I doubled the recipe, so I had 20 servings. There were 12 people at my dad's for dinner yesterday and NO leftovers. They are THAT good

i just texted that to dh - he

i just texted that to dh - he says "dayum that sounds good!"
i think we've got the ingredients at home, maybe he'll make some!!!

This is the kind of thing

This is the kind of thing that just burns me. Skids take all the fun out of everything.

Right? The point of my story

Right? The point of my story was not that they were rude to me, which apparently Sue thinks it was, but rather that they were just rude in general.

I'm not sure if it's skids who take the fun out of everything, but it certainly is ingrates who do.

Yep, my SD doesn't thank her

Yep, my SD doesn't thank her father for anything, either. Just rude, rude, rude.

I don't really care that she doesn't thank me personally, it's that she doesn't say, "Thank You," at all.

And my DH has always taught her to do it, she just doesn't.

Same here.

cause biomom doesn't enforce

cause biomom doesn't enforce it or reinforce it. No general manners now a days

I didn't exaggerate, and I

I didn't exaggerate, and I didn't change the story. I also never said I was angry that they were rude to me.

I really don't know what your problem is.

Others seem to have understood what my post was about. Sorry you weren't one of them

See above

Exactly. I STILL bark at my

Exactly. I STILL bark at my adult children when they are rude

I did it for my husband, and

I did it for my husband, and if they had said thank you to him, I would've been fine with it.

Don't worry, I will not be letting my emotions get the best of me again

It's because you're a nice

It's because you're a nice person. I'm the same way-I go out of my way for these kids and they just don't care.

It is going to be hard for me, but I will not be doing this again

Easter Bunny brought me wine

Easter Bunny brought me wine and vodka. And dark chocolate.

Wow - can you send him my

Wow - can you send him my way??

Only if you know how to say,

Only if you know how to say, "Thank You."

That will work! Cheers!

Oh, yes ma'am, I know how to

Oh, yes ma'am, I know how to say thank you

Almost 70 and my much younger

Almost 70 and my much younger sister brought me an Easter basket today. I didn't have to be reminded to thank her.

I had my sister-in-law and her husband here for the weekend while they attended some events for their son who is getting married. I watched their dog while they ran around getting stuff done and hosted a dinner for the 5 siblings and their spouses. I can't tell you how many times I not only was thanked in general but how many times someone took me aside to tell me how very, very appreciative they were of my hospitality and making out home available for the family to just be together.

And we were all raised by parents who never finished high school and who had no "formal training" in etiquette - but we'd all been taught to be appreciative when others do nice things for you.

Entitled aholes who expect the world to cater to them and do not even know how to realize that someone has gone out of their way to do something nice are just worthless.

First year in seven that I

First year in seven that I didn't do Easter baskets. First year in seven that we didn't have them. The skids were with their mom, and they didn't get Easter baskets.

Yep. Exactly same here not

Yep. Exactly same here not too long ago. I'm now not getting SS anything relating to holidays, gifts, etc. No appreciation = no gifts/cards etc. I just don't get it, how they can be so rude. Or how Biomom hasn't taught them any different. SMH

Yeh WOB seems to be the story

Yeh WOB seems to be the story of the moment - you did a good turn and got it thrown in your face. I have two year old cousins who say thank u and please better than sd.
Hopefully from now on you remember this and give nothing

It is all about training them

It is all about training them from the time they are little imo. My son is 8 and I have raised him to say thank you and be appreciative. For example we went to my fiance'a mothers for Easter. When we got there before we went in I reminded him about being good, using our manners and to remember to thank her afterwards. The kid was amazing.

The thing is your husband still has the power to turn this around with the younger kids.it is a huge disservice to them to not send them out into the world with out teaching them how to behave socially.

My son didn't like Mt exes first of hi a 9 girlfrienda the first year we divorced. From what I could tell from what I was told she was very nice it just was too soon for a then 6 year old boy. I told him though that he needed to be nice and polite to that woman. I can't stand my ex but I would be ashamed if I raised a child who was rude to adults.

He needs to repeated discuss and work on the two younger ones.

The younger two are 16 and

The younger two are 16 and almost 14.

I kind of feel like the manners ship has sailed with the two of them.

I did tell my husband that I will no longer be doing those types of things and that I felt bad for him that his kids were incapable of telling him thank you.

The skids here know how to

The skids here know how to behave - they are very polite with teachers at school, for example. That's the point I always make with DH when he pulls the old "they're just shy" card.

No, they aren't "just shy." They are polite and answer people when they are at school. It isn't that they don't know (and let's face it, who DOESN'T know that when someone speaks to you, it's polite to respond), it's that they CHOOSE to be rude.

It's infuriating...it really is.

well. that was very sweet of

well. that was very sweet of you. and crappy of them.

kaos and lurch are kind of the same way, tho' lurch remembers manners far more often. we went out to dinner last night for the first time in probably two years (and trust me it'll be another two before i do that again!!) I noticed when the waiter filled our glasses, the 'thank you's' from them were automatic. but they rarely are at home towards dh or i.

at least lurch is not completely ungrateful - 9 times out of 10 he'll still respond, even if it's not "thank you". might be something like if i pulled his shirt out of the dryer, he wont say thanks but he may say "ok cool. can i go get it?" and i'm ok with that. if OP's skids had just picked them up and said "ooooh chocolate! yum!" or something to that effect, it may have turned out differently. but to just look at them, pick them up and return back upstairs is uncalled for. that's the kind of reaction i'd expect if dh had said "you left your backpack in the kitchen", not "we've got Easter baskets for you in the kitchen".

I won't try anymore and I

I won't try anymore and I won't remind him about it and I won't buy gifts for them anymore.

I explained to him that I do those things to make his life easier and because when my kids were still at home I took care of the holidays/gifts, but that I have to take myself out of the equation because the lack of appreciation drives me up the wall. Not that they don't express their appreciation to me, but they don't express appreciation to HIM.

Frankly, that makes me angrier. I mean it makes me NUTS when they are rude to him.

Nope - I have been kicking my

Nope - I have been kicking my own ass about this for over 6 years now. I am done.

I won't lift a finger to buy any gift for these skids.

I am soft and gooey on the inside, but only for my family, my husband and my friends. Oh, and doggies and kitties. And really nice strangers. And my co-workers. Ok, ANYONE other than my skids.

Guys am wondering if it would

Guys am wondering if it would petty to take things back if no thank you... I think would rather eat choc myself and be called petty than watch ungrateful ingrates eating it?

Lol. I am petty as sd when tired

Maybe I am just a b÷tch but

Maybe I am just a b÷tch but if my son acted like that you my fiance, I would be all over him. Heck because I am a good mom if he acted like that to the loons gf I would be all over him too. Any adult who treats you well should be treated with respect.

yep - it doesn't happen very

yep - it doesn't happen very often, but I have gotten in their faces when/if they were rude or dismissive of DH.

Hell, just yesterday at Easter dinner, Thing1 had his elbows on the table. As I walked by, I said "hey, Thing1, elbows". He is almost 21!!

I am alllllllll about manners and respect.

I am not a fan of elbows on

I am not a fan of elbows on the table while one is eating. They have known this since they could understand "no elbows on the table."

When it comes to table manners, I live by this

http://emilypost.com/advice/top-ten-table-manners/

Yep - to each his own.

those were pretty much the

those were pretty much the rules i was raised with also. and one that is not included is sit properly - either both feet flat, or ankles crossed, or knees crossed. i used to sit on one foot and it took years for me to figure out how my parents could see through the table that i was not sitting properly - LOL!!!! wasnt until i was older that you could see how one's body compensates and throws your posture crooked - i was like "ooooohhhh so THAT's how they always caught me!" dee de deeee.

ETA - tommar, not sure about exact reasons, but i think the no-elbow rule may have been to keep used, food-covered utensils near the plate instead of waving around up in the air (yanno, gesturing while talking). not sure, but that'd be my guess.

oh yeah - "put your seat on

oh yeah - "put your seat on the seat" is how I was raised and how I raised my kids.

BabyVoice is forever sitting up on one leg - "BV, put your seat on the seat" can often be heard in my house.

I AM a stickler for manners.

here you go, tuff

http://www.culinarylore.com/food-history:no-elbows-on-the-table

I do keep my left hand by my

I do keep my left hand by my side, but I never knew why I did that. I guess it must have been drilled into me as a kid.

I laughed out loud about the guarding the food thing. My brother was in the Navy and when he came home, a cousin made the mistake of reaching across the table to get a roll or something. My brother stabbed him with his fork! Said it was what they did in the Navy.

I didn't know if it was true or not, but I did know that if I did that, he would stab me, too. LOL

that was an interesting

that was an interesting article! i keep my left hand in my lap, not sure why or how i picked up on that - i dont recall my parents ever griping about that, but i must've picked it up somewhere! it's so funny too how many behaviors one can just absorb by environment.

makes you wonder if non-mannered skids live in a bubble!

I am constantly on bs to sit

I am constantly on bs to sit in the midle of his chair. ..omg drives me crazy. Sometimes eating a meal is painful because I am constantly correcting.

A couple of weeks ago my ex sends me a picture of bs with brownie all over his face. He thinks it is cute. I am disgusted as it is bad manners, the kid is in 3rd grade, and we do not speak to each other because he is an ass so why are you texting me pictures of our child doing that while he is with you??? So your gf thinks you are a good dad and I am the hostile one? I nicely spoke with bs and explained it is never cute to do that with your food....please use your good manners when you are with your father too.

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