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crickets on SS19 college tuition

WokeUpABug's picture

Submitted by WokeUpABug on Fri, 03/04/2016 - 12:00pm

So strange... It's been over 1 week since BM emailed DH that she could not pay anymore to SS19s college and that "he would have to take out loans." I figured DH would have come to me by now begging for us to cosign so SS19 could stay in school. Or asking for us to send next semesters money now. But instead... Nothing. He doesn't know I saw the email. Just checked SS19 school account - no one has paid anything recently. I guess I'll just keep quiet. If the parents aren't going to deal with it why should I?

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luv2luv's picture

Submitted by luv2luv on Fri, 03/04/2016 - 1:49pm

I don't mean to be paranoid but is it possible he is secretly trying to find a way to pay the money without letting you know so you won't be upset with him?

WokeUpABug's picture

Submitted by WokeUpABug on Fri, 03/04/2016 - 3:05pm

That is thought occurred to me, but I don't think so. He's not devious. If he decided to cosign a loan he'd probably tell me.

I think it's more that he's embarrassed. The last time we were in therapy he said how unreasonable I was being about SS19 college situation. I told the counselor that I expected BM wouldn't pay her half, and we couldn't cosign for loans bc then we would have to do it for all 4 of DHs kids. We can't be over $100,000 in debt (and it's our debt if we cosign) from their college.

So now that what I predicted has come to pass I think he's just lying low. My guess is it won't get brought up until SS19 is actually being kicked out and then it'll be a crisis. And I'll be the witch for saying he can't cosign.

Indigo's picture

Submitted by Indigo on Fri, 03/04/2016 - 3:28pm

Remember the poster who cosigned student loans and the girl(s) swore they would repay and thank you very, very much since BM can only help X amount/semester? Blink your eyes and the girl(s) bailed on paying the loan or repaying the DH ? It was owed to them. They were due it. The more that he would call or text trying to reconnect and figure out the student loans, the more they would dodge him.

Be careful.