Ok, I'm going to try to post this again. Fingers crossed

I tried to post earlier but they system keeps telling me to wait. I was at 8007 seconds at one point.

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Yesterday I posted about So,

Yesterday I posted about So, I and money.

To sum it up, SO gave SS $60 for no reason and I was upset by it because A. The kids doesn't need it and B. I'm struggling financially right now.

Yesterday on the way home from work, SO again brings up the fact that he gave me $300 and that's the reason he couldn't buy more skateboards (keep in mind we have at least 50+ skateboards at our house, hanging on every wall filling up closets and the garage)

I told him that I would pay him back. He got really mad and said that's not what he meant. I told him that he gave me that money two weeks ago and he has mentioned it every SINGLE day. Enough.

A little back story on this.
When I was married, my husband was a drug addict and alcoholic. We were always broke. To the point that I couldn't stop at 7-11 and buy a water because I never knew if we have $2 in the account.
A few years after we divorced I met another man and we lived together for almost 5yrs. He was 21yrs older than me and owned his own business. He was very well off. I on the other hand, was 28 just got out of the military and was new to my civilian career. I didn't make much. He paid the mortgage and I paid ALL the other bills except his cell and car payment. Needless to say, I was always broke. He NEVER helped me. In fact, he used to complain because I wasn't also helping with the mortgage.

Like a lot of people, I never had anyone help me EVER. My parents never did and the men I was in relationships never did. I know some people that are married or date and when things get tight financially, they don't have a problem helping each other out. I have never been in one of those relationships.
So, when SO put that $300 in my account without me asking, I was extremely touched. No one has ever done that for me. I told him how much I appreciated it and thanked him several times....But now, after him throwing it in my face every day, I resent it. Why help me and then be a dick about it.

Anyway, we are in the car and he's mad and starts saying "What do you want me to help you with, groceries" I say yes. He continues to be mad and say more stupid crap and I just ignore him.

We get home and he writes down all his expenditures for the month and then subtracts it from his income (we did not include CS). Turns out he as almost an entire paycheck left every month (we both get paid every other week).

He then writes down my expenditures with my help while I cook dinner. I had less than $200 a month left over and that was without taking gas for the car into consideration. I was shocked. I know things had gotten pretty tight but I didn't realize and neither did he, how much I was paying out compared to him.

At first he got defensive about it and said "well I'll take over your student loan $60 and the cable $110." Well, that's not half the food bill every month. Not even close. I told him "Why would you pay my student loan. Just pay for half the groceries and that will help me a lot."
Again, at this point he is defensive...He says why haven't you asked me to help you in the past. Ok...Good question, first when we were taking turns buying groceries, he would go to the store, with a list from me, and just buy whatever he wanted. Fine, but then when it was my turn to pay, I had to actually buy the stuff we needed. Example...The last time I sent him, he brought back SEVEN packages of fish....No veges because he couldn't find lettuce and carrots and no sides???? and expected me to make meals. .....After that didn't work, he was giving me his credit card. He would tell me, you can only spend XYZ amount. Never enough to cover our food cost. I would use his card and them cover the rest. I don't know why that stopped. Either he stopped offering or I stopped asking because it was a hassle.

Ok, so he is going to help me pay for groceries. Great....Then out of nowhere he brings up that I bought a nightgown at Disney a few weeks ago. I just looked around the room and he said "What are you looking at" I said, all the skateboards on the walls. I can't buy myself a nightgown but our house can be covered with skateboards? Then he says "Well, I can't be expected to pay for your nighties" Well, I never asked you too. Why are you even bringing this up. I never buy myself anything because I'm always sooo broke. I splurged and now you have to bring it up.

Then, I asked him again how much money he had left after expensives. He told me again. I guess it really sunk in with him then. He stopped being defensive and said he is going to help pay groceries and was actually really nice for the rest of the night. Kissing and hugging on me all night. To be honest, I was pretty depressed by that point. I know I was paying out more, but I guess until I saw it all written down, I didn't realize how uneven things had been.-----Even though SO started out being a jerk about it, it's not really his fault. I'm the one that continued to pay for all the groceries like a jack ass.

Ok, that was long.

How much does your household spend on groceries each month and for how many people. I'd like to get a general idea if I'm spending too much. I feel like I'm spending an average amount. We aren't throwing away food and not a lot of snack food is purchased.

We spend about $350-400 a

We spend about $350-400 a month for 3 people when SD is here. Well, I guess 4 people - I get DS's baby food or items to make food for him too - but it's not very expensive. He's still nursing mostly.

I shop at Aldi.

& sorry your husband is a jerk. I think some people here do something where they add together both incomes & see what % of the household income you make, then you put that % of the household bills in a joint account & pay out of there. Maybe yal could do that?

I also don't buy groceries

I also don't buy groceries until after the skids are gone. We have TONS of healthy and fairly healthy snack food around the house. Both boys are junk food junkies and won't eat it. The only kind of garbage BM serves is fast food, hot dogs, frozen 'meat' entrees (NOT the healthy kind), French fries, potato chips, cookies, and pop Pop POP. They always want to greasiest, fattiest CRAP. Vegetables? Unless it's tater tots or French fries, DH has to stand over them to make them eat the damn veggies. PigPen was in freaking tears over 3 measly bites of corn. SMDH

When I bought DH's favorite snack cakes, PrincASS would eat the entire box (minus one if PigPen managed to get his grubby hand in there). I no longer bake for the skids. 9x13 pan of brownies baked just before they arrive? A couple dozen cookies? GONE before morning. We would have to take the goodies into our bedroom to keep PrincASS from eating the whole bloody pan. It took them drinking an entire CASE of pop in less than 48 hours for DH to realize how much they consumed. DH now limits them to 2 (which hacks them off) and makes them drink milk. Any snack cakes we have are moved to our bedroom before they arrive. When it's skid weekend, DH does the buying and cooking. I go out to eat or bring home a lovely filet and a bottle of red wine for my dinner.

I guess I have been hugely

I guess I have been hugely over spending. I spend about 600-800 a month on 4 people (with Skids with us 3 days a week)

You are including all you cleaning supplies, bathroom items (shampoo, soap) and pet food into that?

I need to start going to Aldi I guess.

We spend about 750 per month

We spend about 750 per month as well. We have three people most of the month and 2 additional skids for 4 days. That is just food, not household supplies like detergent.

ETA: That includes my BS's school lunch account that runs about $100 per month. He eats breakfast and lunch at school.

Ok, I feel a little better.

I'm spending 600-800 on food, cleaning supplies, bathroom items and pet food/snacks.

I still would like to get this down.

close to 1,200 on groceries

close to 1,200 on groceries alone, sometimes less but then we're really cutting it close. That doesn't include special occasions, cookouts, or snacks. There are 8 people in our house. And oh my gosh these teenagers eat often and a lot!!

This is an example of how my

This is an example of how my SO & I handle our finances. We just started it this way a few months ago and it does seem to be working better than him paying me back a set amount every month. The main reason I changed the system is because in the summer when his skids are home all day sucking up ac and energy my light bills double. Not fair for him to be paying me a set amount when the bills fluctuate. We don't use this method with groceries though. I subtract out high dollar items of his and mine (razor blades, wrinkle cream, vitamins) from the total of the bill and then split the bill. If his skids are in town the bill is divided by three and he pays for 2/3 of the bill.
John earns $2,000 per month, which is 33 percent of their household's total income. Sally earns $4,000 per month, which is 66 percent of the household's total income.

The couple spends $3,000 per month on their household bills, such as their mortgage, utilities, groceries, and one-twelfth of their annual expenses such as their property taxes. (Learn more about how to budget for unexpected bills.)

John earns 33 percent of the couple's combined income, so he pays 33 percent of their $3,000 monthly bill, which equals $1,000.

Sally earns 66 percent of the couple's combined income, so she pays 66 percent of their monthly bill, which equals $2,000.

Pro's - The main advantage is their neither partner feels the pressure to "keep up with" or "budget down to" the earnings of the other partner. In other words, their income disparity doesn't cause a lifestyle clash.

I'm glad it's not just me! I

I'm glad it's not just me! I feel like I waaay over spend on groceries/basic toiletries/etc... Minimum 150/week on 'groceries'. That's including shampoo, soap, paper goods, etc... It still just seems to high to me.

ETA

That's just for two people, plus skids 4 days a month. DH and I pack lunch every day, but still...

He sells the skateboards and

He sells the skateboards and makes extra money doing that, but he also is very passionate about it and collects (you wouldn't believe how much some of those things cost)

But I feel the same, why are we arguing over his money and my money. We are supposed to be getting married soon, doesn't that mean we are in this together and help each other no matter what? Sometimes I feel like I'm living with a roommate that I'm sleeping with.

i'm old school too all

i'm old school too all household bills come out of one account, the rest of our paychecks we keep for personal use. his goes into his checking account (direct deposit), and i usually keep the rest of mine as cash. he ends up buying most of the groceries but i use my cash all the time for various odds and ends that benefit the whole household. there's no way i could live separate - it's OURS, our house our marriage, our bills, our money.

We have 6 people, we get our

We have 6 people, we get our groceries at super Walmart.
4 kids are home 50% of the time, 3 are teens and the preteen eats more than the teens!

Our grocery budget averages 350.00 a month.

But we don't split bills like you and your SO do, we have a list of stuff that's joint/house: ex: mortgage, electricity, cable, cell bill, car insurance, groceries
The total a month with it all is ~ 3,000
WE have 3 checking accounts:
DH has a checking
I have a checking
We have a joint checking

Around the 1st of the month, We transfer 1500 each to the joint, all joint bills come out of that.

My car payment is my responsibility, His payments are his responsibility.

It works perfect for us, its all on a spread sheet, everyone knows the others money situation

we spend probably 6 to 800 or

we spend probably 6 to 800 or so. this is not including beer budget.

We spend between $600-700 a

We spend between $600-700 a month on food. We have two teenage boys in the house and I will admit my BS eats more than two grown men. But he eats it and doesn't waste it so I have no problems with it.

DH and I used to have seperate accounts but when I realized I was paying ALL the bills and he was playing with his money I blew a gasket and that changed.
Now we have a joint account and I take whatever I want of his money to pay toward bills. I make considerably more than he does so I don't expect 50/50 split.
I know he gets cash bonuses from time to time that he doesn't tell me about. They aren't much, maybe $50-100 and I know that he give the XW more extra money than what he admits to. I used to get really pissed and we have had major blow ups over it so now he hides it from me.
I have my own private account with my slush fund in it so I stop bitching about what he gives the ex. If I don't see it come out of our joint account, I could care less. I buy my BS whatever the hell I want with my own stash and DH never says a word.
DH just recently changed jobs and should be making more money. If it gets to the point I feel he is taking advantage, I just transfer my check out of our joint acct and put it in my provate acct.

Apparently I way over spend

Apparently I way over spend on groceries every month. :jawdrop: We usually spend between $125 and $150 every week. For a family of 5.

We send hat on two adults,

We send hat on two adults, and two EOWE skids... I don't feel like I buy that much, but omg. Almost half the bill is usually produce though, and that is expensive.

About 800.00 a month. two

About 800.00 a month. two adults and two teenagers. Two adults and two teenagers. We are Costco and farmers market kind of people. Only way to live in such an expensive area.

And since day one is getting married he just share all of our money. We have one checking account and One savings account. We are very like minded with money. So in the five years we have been together we have had not one argument about money. The kids, that's a whole Other set of arguments.