My life summed up in 5 minute conversations (or less).
Inspired by Heckfire. These are actual conversations I've had with my family in the last 24 hours....
DW: "Friday we'll prime, Saturday we'll move the furniture and buy the paint, and Sunday we can paint the room and make the new bed..."
Me: "You're being ambitious again."
DW: "Why do you have to be so pessimistic? With you, the glass is always half empty..."
Me: "No no! If you are going to use an analogy, use a proper one! You are hoping to fill a sippy cup by holding it underneath Niagra Falls!"
...
......
...
BD: "Daddy! Daddy! Look!"
Me: "What? What am I looking at?"
BD: "My fingers! Look!"
Me: "Oh! you put fingernail polish on your fingernails....and your fingers,....and your hands.....and your arms...."
BD: "I pretty now!"
...
......
...
BS: "When is supper ready?
Me: "Supper will be ready in Thirteen thousand, six-hundred and Sixty four seconds!"
BS: "That's not a number!"
...
......
....
Me: "How was your day SS?"
SS: "Huh?"
Me: "How was your day?"
SS: "What do you mean?"
Me: "Did you fall and bump your head again?"
SS: "No."
Me: "Okay, so you had a GOOD day then."
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Comments
I'm disappointed that Nutella
I'm disappointed that Nutella didn't come up...
Oh I love the "I pretty now".
Oh I love the "I pretty now". How much furniture was painted with her body art?
DW is the EXACT. SAME. WAY
DW is the EXACT. SAME. WAY with SS.
Gotta give him a play-by-play, gotta dumb-down (like WAY down) adult conversations so that he understands. Gotta stop the movie and explain to him why that joke was funny.
It's so maddening!
LMAO I love when I tell my
LMAO
I love when I tell my dog to do something and then I hear skid trying to tell my dog to do something. Every. Single. Time. I call my dog over to me when that shit starts up. No. Nope. Nu uh. NOBODY tells my dog what to do but me.
I love the convo with SS, my
I love the convo with SS, my SD16 favorite answer is "I don't know what you mean"!! Drives me up the wall!! Really? How was your day, "I don't know what you mean by that?" and she is a straight A student!! Has not one lick of common sense, NONE!!
>I don't
>I don't understand...<
Welcome to my life!!!!!
Me: Have you talked to skids
Me: Have you talked to skids lately?
DH: Yeah, like a week ago. I need to call them.
Me: crickets
Me: YSD broke her arm. BM text me. Said I should tell you. I don't know why she doesn't just text you.
DH: Really? Ouch. Poor YSD
Me: Crickets
Me: Why did a water gun fight turn into a mud fight?
Sons: I don't know how that happened. I fell in it. (It's all over both of them)
Me: Each of you go jump in a shower right now.
5 minutes later
DH: Why are (your)sons hair wet?
ME: They had a water fight that somehow got covered in mud and had to take showers and now getting ready for dinner.
DH: How did that all happen in the 8 minutes since you got them from school and walked in the door?
This is pretty much life. I play referee for my kids and gofer between BM and DH.
>DH: How did that all happen
>DH: How did that all happen in the 8 minutes since you got them from school and walked in the door?<
WOW!!! For real!?!? I can't leave my little one alone for more than a minute before the mini-rumble, this Sunday, Sunday SUNDAY! starts!