I only have a minute to blog but really wanted to get this off my chest. I think it sums up the way I am treated and why I feel disrespected all the time.

Yesterday morning, I was still in bed but I hear DH getting breakfast for SD. She wanted a waffle. Last week, I had asked him to please not allow her to eat waffles or pancakes in the living room because of dripping syrup. I am not usually super strict about eating in the living room but soup, syrup, stuff like that bothers me because it's hard to clean up and I am the only one who is going to clean it. Also, I am the one who paid for the couch and the rug in the living room so I'd like to NOT have my stuff ruined.

So I hear DH tell her "No, you can't. Asgoodasitgets doesn't want you to eat waffles in there because of the syrup." Thanks, DH way to put it all on me. Showing a little support would have been nice. But, I said nothing.

This morning, I heard muffled talking coming from the kitchen. This alone is suspicious because usually neither DH nor SD have any kind of consideration for me when I am still in bed on these early mornings. So if they are speaking quietly, I know something's up. I got up to tell SD goodbye before school. I could see that she had been eating breakfast in the living room because there was still a juice and a napkin on the coffee table. They leave and I go into the kitchen to make coffee. Lo and behold there on the counter is a half-eaten waffle and a plate full of syrup.

When DH returns, I say "Didn't I ask you to not let SD eat waffles in here?" DH tells me he forgot and SD asked and he just said yes without thinking. I said "That's funny because I heard you tell her that just yesterday. In fact, I heard you blame it all on me. So it's funny that you BOTH already forgot after one day." He just sat there with a blank look on his face. So I went on "You know DH, this is why I feel disrespected. First, I don't think this is an extreme request. It is my home, too. I paid for the furniture and the rug, and I will be the one to clean it when it gets filthy. When SD is old enough to have her own home, buy her own furniture and clean up after herself, she can eat wherever she wants. But I have a right to make rules in my home. And if you don't back me up on them or just refuse to enforce them entirely, it is disrespectful to me. It teaches SD that she doesn't have to obey the rules or respect me either. You BOTH knew and remembered the rule, you just chose not to follow it because you thought I wouldn't find out because I was still asleep." He said nothing, just stared straight ahead.

It is just a little thing but this crap happens every time SD comes over. If they want to go back to living by themselves, why don't they just do it? I hate feeling like an outsider in my own home! I don't know how much more of this I can take.