My parenting rant
Why do these parents NOT understand children are selfish parasites by nature? You have to train them to care, and follow rules!!! They will by their very nature get away with whatever they are allowed to. They will by nature be lazy. We have to train them to not be.
I have parents and teacher tell me they are shocked I'm so involved with DDs learning disability and BSs OCD/ Aspergers. I don't see where I'm doing anything special. They didn't ask to be born. They are my responsibility until 18. Then it is on them. I am doing everything I can to be their parent. If they don't make it, not my fault. But why ????? Why????? Is it so damn shocking that I would be a parent??? If I'm really that rare, I FEAR for this next generation. I'm not going above and I'm not doing to much. I just parenting and giving tools to MY OCD/Aspergers and learning disabled children. How would they function without them?? Do I excuse DD?? Would that be better??? Sorry she fails every class but she has an excuse??? BULLsh!t!!!!! She will do 150% and all extra credit. Then, yes, if she fails ok. We work harder. But just to excuse it??? That helps her how???
BS.... Do I just excuse the behavior with well he has issues??? But at least he is smart and a grade ahead?? Don't pay attention to the fact he has no boundaries he doesn't know better?!!!? How does that help him????
No, he will go to counseling, take his meds, do his chores, have punishment for bad behavior and rewards for good behavior. A good day at class? He gets a $5 Toy. A bad day? No Xbox for a week. A good day working on school work at home??? One individual starburst per good page, a bad day??? An extra page per issue. Please tell me how this is going above??!?! It seems like being a parent to me?!?!?!
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It just blows my mind. I see
It just blows my mind. I see the difference even with BF and me.
BS is encouraged to be a smart-ass and have no physical boundaries at BFs. And he comes home a mess. BF and I were married until DD was in second grade. I pushed the schools to have her in speech (no one could understand her but me!!!!) I made the schools test her in 2nd grade. Yhreatened a law suit if they waited until 4th as that would be too late. BF sat around with she will catch up, I was like this.... Blah blah blah. I have actually heard the same excuses for SGD from DH, I was like this.... AND??!? That doesn't make it ok!!! Stand up for your children and to them!!! At my house BS has more pets and responsibility then DD because he needs that. DD is actually really responsible so she gets breaks on her room and stuff. Bs hasn't gotten it so he has more.
My best Friend and I have
My best Friend and I have spoken how if anyone was truly honest about pregnancy and child... The human race would die out in the next 100 years.
Pregnancy SUCKs!!! It is not a magical time. You have a parasite draining life from you, while not letting you keep any food down!!!! Children are selfish, self-centered, lazy monsters!!!! They do not come out of a box with manners, work drive, consideration or knowledge. Yes, they are all different. DD has a learning disability but has become a wonderful young lady. BS has a genius IQ level and is a human sponge. He is a grade ahead and would be farther if he didn't need to spend more time on math and writing. But he has no understand of human contact boundaries. He is OCD/Aspergers. He needs direction.
My children have become good people. I am not a shining awesome parent. I just parent. ALL children need guidance. They do deserve a lot of the credit because they are the ones that actually follow through with what I teach them.
DH has very different ideas. He thinks if our bedroom is not clean it is hypacritical to tell them to clean. I think they have 3 jobs in life at their age (9&11) 1. School. It is a JOB take it seriously 2. Minimal responsibility compared to adults. One of these is their bedroom. When they turn 18, and pay their own rent they can not clean their room. For now, it is their job to learn to take care of their stuff. 3. Personal behavior and accountability.
Their is nothing hypocritacal about the fact that my bedroom is not always clean, but they always eat and I make sure they clean theirs. Different priorities at different ages.
AMEN!!!! BM thinks we run our
AMEN!!!!
BM thinks we run our house like boot camp or military school because we have chore/behavior charts the more points you earn the money you get. They are also rewarded for good grades at report card time. Before my skids came to live with us all they saw was BM not working, not cleaning the house and if she was to lazy to get up to get them to school they wouldn't go. Since they now live with us, they have prefect attendance, SD has straight As, OSS has Bs and Cs and YSS is in a program for the hearing impaired/deaf and he is finally learning how to read and do basic math.
If you show kids laziness that is what they will learn, but you give them the tools they need in life they will become something great.
Hi there, OT but I just
Hi there,
OT but I just wanted to ask you - how hearing impaired is your YSS and do you have any issues with him refusing to wear his aids or accept help at school etc?
My dd12 is mild/moderate (at 60% in left ear and 40% in right I think that's more moderate to severe myself but that's how they rate it LOL) She wears aids but most days refuses to wear them and says she is just fine and doesn't miss anything - she has many strategies to cope but I KNOW she is not hearing stuff and doing the best she could if she would wear the damn things and accept the integration aides at school etc. Frustrates the heck out of me. Yesterday she had High School orientation day (different school system here in Aus.) and they had all the incoming yr 7's in the hall, had a bit of an information session and speech etc, then called out all the names for each class, one class at a time so that group goes off with their home group teacher and the next class is called.
At the end Miss 12 is one of 4 kids left sitting there - she missed her name being called! She claims the teacher just missed her name on the roll..... I said "wear your damned hearing aids!" (the teachers at the new school looked at me like I was a bit harsh but I have been dealing with this for YEARS!
So, how does your ss go with it all?
(sorry to take over your blog OP
In my family there is a gene
In my family there is a gene for hearing lose passed down to all the boys. By brother has had hearing aids since 16. My dad was legally dead at 54, but had hearing aids since 17, his older brother my uncle was able to use hearing aids after 50, as his hearing was gone. The aids no longer worked. Every male as had hearing aids by 17 yrs old for the last 7 generations. I have to have my sons hearing tested once a year as he has the gene. It started to decrease last year.
I spoke to my brother about this. He said there is a huge embarrassment factor but also they are painful if you don't have the right ones or the exact fit. At your DDs age, she might not realize they are not suppose to hurt. And if she has the right ones, she can all but forget they are on. Talk to her and see why she really doesn't want to wear them.
Okay, I was going to edit
Okay, I was going to edit this but it didn't let me for some reason. Stupid auto correct. No, my dad was legally deaf at 34, not dead at 54. All 50's should have been 30's. Sorry