I know where I belong...

I made the mistake of venturing off into other lands of internet. Lesson learned.

Since BM moved away (YAY) life is been somewhat uneventful so I haven't had much to update. I did get curious about other step websites based on a post I saw in the forum the other day. So I tried to join one...

I couldn't believe some of the advice being given to people. (Which, I don't know if you've noticed but the rest of the internet has deemed us all on ST as 'crazy evil bitches') and the first thread I read was asking for advice from Step parents from a BM:

(Paraphrasing)

"My ex's new girlfriend is SOOOOOO jealous of me. I don't understand why. It's not like I want him or anything. And she FORCES my ex-husband not call or have anything to do with our kids. Recently, she went on a trip and so he was able to spend some alone time with me and the kids and so that helped but now she's back and he won't have anything to do with us again. She's horrible and my kids are suffering because they have no relationship with their Dad."

And these other women were CONSOLING her because of her ex husband's "abusive" girlfriend.

It took me that one thread to know that I don't belong on any step related websites except this one.

I'm guess I'm a crazy bitch too.

HungryEyes's blog
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I like how we SM's FORCE our

I like how we SM's FORCE our husbands to not talk to their kids/ex's. I can't force a grown man to do anything. I don't think people realize how crazy some of these BM's are. Most of us on this site deal with crazy BM's and really disrespectful skids. I don't think society wants to think that Moms and Children can be rude or crazy, or what have ya.So when you do try to express how you feel, people look down on you. We are "evil" becuase we realize the truth and aren't going to deal with it or get "stepped" on (see what I did there..lol)!

Well maybe that's all they

Well maybe that's all they know? Trying to force their will on another person. I mean, it's not like they continue doing that after the divorce or anything, right? Lol

Yeah that's pretty

Yeah that's pretty bad...spend time with us? Sounds to me that she won't let her ex to see the kids with out her...She sounds lovely...this guys poor wife...I can't belive he went and spent time with the EX and the kids. Kids fine but the ex, no no...I bet you, he didn't tell his wife what he did.

And of the 19 responses or so

And of the 19 responses or so - NO ONE pointed out the 'Spending time with US' part and I'm thinking. 'WTF is wrong with you people? That's a huge red flag.' It's just crazy to me. I'm so glad I found you guys first.

I meant on the responses on

I meant on the responses on the site. I saw that you noticed.

Meerkat- I'm going to need a

Meerkat- I'm going to need a link to this first wives site lol... I'm sorry. I have to see this!

lmao- first wives

lmao- first wives club...

meh. they can have it. we can be the Upgrade Club.

Yes. The upgrade club. My

Yes. The upgrade club. My avatar agrees.

That's how I see it. My DH

That's how I see it. My DH and I both got the upgrade when we found each other.

Me too! And BM even knows

Me too! And BM even knows it. She can not deny that.

First wife means the marriage

First wife means the marriage failed (with death being the exception). So, they are proud of that? Whatever.

I've been with my DH longer than he was married to the "first" two put together. They were trial runs and both were mistakes.

Not only am I the last wife, I am THE wife.

me too, we've just celebrated

me too, we've just celebrated our one year wedding anniversary, he had two 6 month marriages before me! By next year we'll be an old married couple compared to the first two.

I don't know about you all,

I don't know about you all, but the minute I became DH's girlfriend, I locked him in the closet. No phone calls, no visits. Daughter? What daughter? What ex-wife? }:)

The fact is, he didn't want to talk to BM, much less see her. And I didn't care one bit how often he talked to or saw SD. The only person who came between DH and his daughter, was his ex-wife.

Only for special occasions.

Oh yes, BM is the one coming

Oh yes, BM is the one coming between DH and the skids. I have always loathed divorced parents who use their children as a bargaining tool and "punish" the other parent by "withholding" the children. WTH?! Why are these people too stupid to realize that the KIDS are the ones being hurt the most?? I know a couple of kids whose mother played that game and guess what? As they got older, they realized that she was the bad guy and not their dad. Guess who they rarely talk to anymore? Mommie Dearest. smh

Not to be vulgar but WHAT THE

Not to be vulgar but WHAT THE FUCK??? Why do these psychos think WE force our SO's not to talk with them? How about our SO's don't want to talk to you? Bm tries that often "oh your wife doesn't let you talk to me" bitch, he can talk to you all he wants, I guess because Dh doesn't want to have long romantic talks with methheadmcgee it's my fault? Those sites are ridiculous. I visited one once when I first got into this step game and they make Step parents feel like shit like we are the enemy. It's such bullshit. ughhh..

Uggghhh…. In a perfect world,

Uggghhh…. In a perfect world, steps, bio's, ex's and present spouses would all get along. It really is the best thing for everyone. Sadly, it takes a very mature, secure, bunch of people to make that work.
Our BM is hell on wheels. However, she seems to have lost some steam in the last 14 years. Usually, in the past, any special event like a graduation or a religious event, like a confirmation or a communion, would have set her off in a tangent for WEEKS prior to the event. "UFR is not allowed to set foot in the church! If you can't come ALONE don't come at ALL! It's not UFR's place to be anywhere near ME & MY CHILDREN! Why can't you go anywhere without UFR? Did she take your balls away?"
DH set his foot down and it was either we BOTH went, or he didn't show up at all.
When SD13 graduated (by the skin of her teeth) from Middle School, BM didn't even tell him when the graduation was, where, what time, nothing. When he asked her, she told him that it was his daughters place to invite him and that he should talk to her.
So he did. SD gave us the info, we showed up, she sat on one side of the church, we sat at the other. After the ceremony, she took her pictures with her mom, then we took our pictures with her. SD ended up leaving with us and we took her and her brother out to dinner to celebrate.
It took a while for DH to comprehend that he didn't have to have a relationship with the mom in order to spend time with his kids. Once he made that clear to her & she saw that she was no longer able to manipulate him, she kinda gave up.
I hate all other sites. THOSE bitches are WACKO!!!

"Which, I don't know if

"Which, I don't know if you've noticed but the rest of the internet has deemed us all on ST as 'crazy evil bitches'

UNTIL they themselves become a SM . . .

It's only a matter of time.

First wives? I don't

First wives? :sick:

I don't identify with my ex in any way. I can't wrap my brain around that concept. How about: I was a bad wife and he was a bad husband and that's why the relationship was a complete and utter failure. That is a concept I can identify with.

Mistake wives is more like it.