My Partner and I have our eldest son my Step son away at school. We live in the outback so SS boards with my Brother and his family on the Coast.
SS is homesick, coming into winter of his first year away. I love ss but we have had our ups and downs, as he is a (no insult intended) very selfish personality and can be angry and violent towards myself and the other children when he doesnt get his way.
We decided to take the rest of the family (6 children plus BD and I) to visit SS for the long weekend. this means 8 bikes, troop carrier, trailer, 600+km, accomodation and all in a 4 day turnaround.
As much as this seems like a feat, we are used to everything being a huge effort and kids and I were all looking forward to the change of scenery and a bigger town!

BD very nervously asked me to change plans and for him to go alone to have a boys weekend with SS.
This should be fine.
However it didn't feel fine.
I was instantly jealous, sad, felt left out and "uninvited". I have just had minor surgery and a few complications so i am exhausted and didn't feel like being left at home alone with 6 kids, 7 dogs, a bottle fed joey, lamb, piglet, and the ususal piles of mess washing and cooking that comes with a big busy family.
I tried not to communicate my feelings- knowing that it was important to BD and man of my dreams to have the "man to man" time with his 13 year old son, but being tired run down, in pain and hormonal the whole crazy immature stressed out and jealous blahh came pouring out that afternoon.
BD was planning to take bikes and he and SS would go riding and travelling around tracks sleeping in the troop carrier. (something that BD and I do as our special couple time, which happens 2 x yearly) That added salt to my already smarting wounds!

I dearly wish i could turn off the feelings of being left out and jealous of the time my SS will have with my partner as i know they are wrong and childish but i cant.
I am honestly the most selfless mother and lover possible, i put everyone before myself and i guess theres a little part of me that is screaming over the unfairness of me never making myself a priority, but seeing my partner making himself and his Son a priority!

long story short, he has barely spoken to me for 24 hours and its killing me, I know i shouldnt have been so upset, but the silent treatment is not helping.
I have after venting my feelings given the weekend my blessing, do i now give him space and hope he forgives me??