So thankful I may cry!
The process to get ss evaluated started, doc agreed to do it and ss pretty much showed why while we were in the office. As we adults are talking to the doc ss is sitting there all calm as a cucumber mouth agape looking at the door. doc says "well he seems to do well sitting still look at him" kid didn't respond, SO say "hey ss" kid shakes his head mouth still hanging open "huh?" Doc starts to talk to him and he's playing with his shoes, pulling at his shirt playing with his hands scooting up and down the exam table pulling at the paper and then bouncing up and down. Doc starts to ask him questions kid loses it starts to cry and drool gets even more fidgety. Normally SO would step in and tell him to sit on his hands, quick kicking his feet sit still, I just placed my hand on his arm and said "let him see this"
I told the doc I felt there might be some anxiety as well and we got the packet to fill out. His teachers were so fantastic they filed them out and had them back to us today! I found the scoring and it's about what I expected though I thought he was more ADD inattentive,and anxiety but it looks more ADD inattentive AND hyper. We haven't told BM yet they have joint 50/50 and if she wanted to make a stink she could but we also know she's too stupid to really know she can stop this process. I'm hopeful she'll fill out her paperwork (not her mom) and that she can understand the instructions (1 is never 4 is all the time everything else is in between) SO is supposed to text her we have paperwork for her to fill out by Monday to keep her on a timeline at least, but I really feel as frustrating as the kid can be he deserves a shot both kids are smart but this is hurting him. I've taught them to read now they read really well (ss only if he thinks he's alone if he's reading too someone he forgets how no joke his reading part of his brain goes dim)
They both have a shot but he has to have help, next step is a councilor he asked me if he could have someone to talk to like I do (I go to counseling once in awhile just to work on my own past and trust issues and have someone to talk to)
I'll be so happy if this helps him but I've never had to deal with medicating a kid so any of you that do input opinions on meds, bad reactions, med breaks all of it I'd welcome the experience.
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I am not in favor of meds.
I am not in favor of meds. My nephew is ADD and doesn't take them, but he has two parents and my mom who keep him in check. For him, motivation is key. He is now being rewarded with a trip he wants if he gets Straight A's this next semester. He has to take tests in the hall and this is what the teachers have figured out.
My sister was this way when she was younger, long before they labeled it ADD or ADHD. She was just hyper. She was medicated when she was three for awhile and then they stopped. My parents learned how to deal with her. She was a straight A student and now a VP with one of the largest insurance carriers in the country.
Medication is not always the answer. My nephew wants to be in the Air Force, he is 13 now and doing Civil Air Patrol and that has been great for him. He has talked to the recruiters and they said not to medicate him since he can't join if he takes the meds. One of my good friends has two boys who are ADD and ADHD and Bi polar. One is medicated and one was for years. Now at 18 he wanted to join the Army, they had to take him off the meds for the last two years so he could join. So this month, he leaves. It can be done, just takes good parenting and a team of people to work with the kid.
I am wary of meds, I think we
I am wary of meds, I think we have a country full of overmedicated kids and who knows how it's affecting their developing brains?
That being said, BM put SSthen6, 6 YEARS OLD, on Adderall. This was before I met SO, so his response was "she's got primary custody, nothing I can do about it."
Well, once the kid is medicated, it's not like you can pull him off of them. This poor kid has been on so many different meds...Adderall, Namenda, Ritalin, Depakote, you name it, he's been on it.
I'm going to post about this also......I think ALL ADD/ADHD kids should be given this test, to test for PANDAS. SSnow9's streptococcal levels were OFF THE CHARTS and he's on an antibiotic for at least a year.
maybe it's a step in the
maybe it's a step in the right direction for ya lalena- yay!
always be careful with the meds if dr prescribes any, and by all means yes your dh needs to find him a counselor!
with all the other packets filled out, maybe it wont even matter whether or not bm doesnt fill hers out or if she screws it up...
again please be careful with the meds. my little bro is badly add, and responded well to adderall. one dr's visit the dr made a "typo" on the script, accidentally doubling it. he was like a zombie until my mom figured out the screw up.
also, dumbass had yss on various different ones. one in particular made him violent- not good. but she was not consistent and the dr was an idiot. she'd try one sporadically for a few days (yes, days, not weeks or months) then call the dr and say "this isnt working, give him something else" and idiot doc would call in a diff script. yss does not like taking medications and she was also too stupid to help him understand, so when she'd give it to him he'd pitch a fit.
so, be careful, be watchful and vigilant. but yay, i hope all this heads in the right direction for you ss!!!
This apparently won't be
This apparently won't be popular but I can only tell you what I have experienced with my two "special needs" kids.
My son is 16, almost 17. He was diagnosed with sensory dysfunction in kindergarten and finally in third grade with Pervasive Developmental Disorder Not Otherwise Specified (PDD NOS) which is an autistic spectrum disorder. My daughter is 13 and has mild ADD diagnosed in about 2nd grade. My son is a straight A student. Neither of them have any behaviorial issues, no drugs, no drinking.
No offense to anyone else but my kids have been on meds for years and had no ill effects. EVERY CHILD IS DIFFERENT AND EVERY REACTION IS DIFFERENT TO MEDICATION. I was fortunate to find excellent doctors and I made sure to educate myself on everything necessary with those meds. My son is on Adderall XR and Risperdal (very low dose for moods) and my daughter started with Adderall, wasnt a good match, now on Concerta and doing very well.
Routine is vital. So is regular sleep and good nutrition. Patience, patience, patience but yes, the world doesnt give a shit your kid has ADD so they need to learn coping mechanisms. Work with the school as much as possible and get help from occupational therapist, speech pathologist, school psychologist, whoever you need. Also limit video games and pay close attention to the child's threshold - if they get too overwhelmed you need to be willing to leave an event or stop an activity.
DO NOT DISCOUNT MEDS OFF THE BAT BECAUSE OF WHAT OTHER PEOPLE SAY. If you try them, you do. If you don't, so what but don't automatically buy the party line that ALL meds are bad. Kids are overdiagnosed because of miseducation and lack of interest in adjusting current methods of teaching. Our world is an overstimulated mess of technology and the constant barrage of info and sensory input. If meds don't work, fine, at least you know. If they do, they give the child an edge.
Most importantly: that kid is YOUR concern not mine, not any other poster on this website. None of us (yeah, sorry if I am getting defensive but I get very tired of defending why my kids are medications even though it obviously WORKS for THEM) are doctors or psychiatrists. Trust your gut and listen.
I do agree that it works for
I do agree that it works for some and not for others. You are lucky they work for you. They tried them on my SS before we had full custody, BM is a pharmacist. He got migraines. DH said no more drugs and he has grown out of the issues he had.
I just want the OP to be cautious, not every kid needs to be medicated and not every med works for every kid. I volunteer with teens and know kids on them and kids that should be and ones that the parents have made it work without. There is no perfect diagnosis, so you have to do what works for you. I am just not in favor of parents using drugs instead of parenting their kids.
I apologize if I came off as
I apologize if I came off as getting hysterical - one of the things I like about all of the posters on this site is that it's a wide range of experiences, values, beliefs, and emotions. All of them are valuable and important. I'm sorry if I sort of lost my mind there. I was very blessed to find the docs I did for my kids. There were a lot of tears in the beginning and if you met my son back in first grade compared to two years later you would have been stunned at the change. That was due to all of it, not just meds obviously but all the support services he was getting as well as me reading everything I could get my hands and a lot of trial and error.
The hardest part of having a kid with an "invisible" issue is that other people do judge what they can SEE. If a kid was missing an arm would you get angry he couldnt juggle? Of course not. Unfortunately, people do it all the time to kids with ADD and autism/autistic spectrum.
Major kudos to OP and her DH for getting help for SS early! If BM wants to live in fantasyland and deny her son needs some help, she's a fool.
I apologize if I came off as
I apologize if I came off as getting hysterical - one of the things I like about all of the posters on this site is that it's a wide range of experiences, values, beliefs, and emotions. All of them are valuable and important. I'm sorry if I sort of lost my mind there. I was very blessed to find the docs I did for my kids. There were a lot of tears in the beginning and if you met my son back in first grade compared to two years later you would have been stunned at the change. That was due to all of it, not just meds obviously but all the support services he was getting as well as me reading everything I could get my hands and a lot of trial and error.
The hardest part of having a kid with an "invisible" issue is that other people do judge what they can SEE. If a kid was missing an arm would you get angry he couldnt juggle? Of course not. Unfortunately, people do it all the time to kids with ADD and autism/autistic spectrum.
Major kudos to OP and her DH for getting help for SS early! If BM wants to live in fantasyland and deny her son needs some help, she's a fool.
I appreciate all the
I appreciate all the different opinions. BM's brother has been diagnosed with adult ADD and has it bad (did as a kid too but was labeled a "problem child") We here have tried all sorts of stuff before having him evaluated. I originally pushed the fact I though he was having absence seizures but they are hard to diagnose and if they were happening (a few times I know they did but at the time I didn't know what was going on till I got into medicine) by that time we weren't seeing them and ss was actually able to say that his "spacing out and forgetting" didn't happen anymore and if he was spacing we could now easily get his attention.
I've been reading up on and looking into various choices for treatment I think after all we've tried meds will be good for him. My DD is on anti depressants and we only had to try 2 different ones because we waited let them get working see how they affected her. I have a cousin who has a kid who very young (3) was just off the charts ADD/ADHD. ODD it was crazy they did behavior therapy, meds, and more suddenly at 7 they hit the right med combo and he was a brand new amazing child. I'm not a fan of medicating kids, I like to start elsewhere first this is just where we are now. Then we have to worry depending on the meds the doc may try BM stealing them or forgetting ss is really good with routine when it's established so we should be able to teach him to monitor his meds at BM's too.