OK- so I am not involved in much of anything SS related anymore. When school calls- tell them to call his dad. I don't get him up or ready in the morning. I don't do homework. I don't discipline. I am pretty much the housekeeper/chauffeur as far as he is concerned.

DH is still not disciplining him and it is driving me BONKERS! He gets notes sent home daily! He is just a bad kid and honestly at this point it is too late. At 8 if he has never had to be accountable to responsible in his life, never had to sit still, never had to do what he was told- He won't be able to change. He is ruined. However, it is hard having 2 bios that are good kids, do well in school, are polite and respectful and seeing them get upset that SS is always doing wrong but never punished. I tell them that I have no control over SS, he is DH's problem but I have higher expectations for them. I try to reward the good they do. I try to tell them how much I appreciate them and how proud I am.

But it drives me crazy. The only thing I can see happening is that there will be peace in a few years when SS is most certainly locked up in juvie.... What else can I do to show my bios how important it is to keep doing the right things? And how does a control freak let it go because it is tearing me up! I am about to get on anti-anxiety meds!