I really hate this whole stinking mess. I tell everyone I meet NOT to marry a guy with kids. It's just not worth it. It's not.

My BD7 likes to get the mail. There was something in there addressed to SD20, even though she's never lived with us. BD7 wanted to know if it could possibly be something FROM SD20. BD7 did not hear from her on her birthday last month, she doesn't call and talk to them, text them, nothing. They feel very overlooked. And it makes me feel like crap FOR BD7.

So it's a bank statement. When SD turned 16, she lived with BM full time (only occasional visitation for DH, sometimes only once in 6 months). She finally got her first job at almost 17, suddenly DH decides he MUST open a bank account for her in our town, an hour away from where she lives with BM. I never understood that. Wouldn't you open your own bank account in your own town? He put his name on the account.

Fast forward to age 20, DH's name is STILL on SD's bank account. So the notice we got yesterday is that she is overdrawn. DH immediately texts her, and I asked him, "Why are you getting these notices? Shouldn't they be going to SD20?" Pardon me and my logic. Of course he gets all defensive, bank must have made an error, blah blah blah. No they didn't. You have all along gotten her notices, and you're doing it so you can bail her out. Admit it. (I didn't say that to him, only thought it.)

I told him he needs to get OFF her account. "Are you liable if she overdraws?" Of course he doesn't know, which is also a lie because she has overdrawn many times before, he should know if you are listed on the account it is your responsibility as well. SD20 has no job, and I know the reason she is overdrawn. She is on yet another trip out of state to attend a concert with her friends. Doesn't work, but sure knows how to spend money.

Why would SD20 let DH's name be on her account when she is an ADULT? One simple reason: Every time she overdraws, DH bails her out. It's a built-in backup. Who would give that up?