Budding Psychopath?????
SS16 has always had Quite the bratty violent attitude since 4 or 5 yrs old. DH either played it off as "just the way kids are these days" or "BM spoiled him so not much DH can do since SS is mostly with BM".
SS16 refuses to help around the house with anything. Has no interest in getting a job. Will take a day off from school just because he wants too. Sleeps all day and up all night playing video games. Nothing is ever his fault, someone else is always to blame.
The last time SS16 was "punished" by DH SS16 was 8 years old. DH Threaten to take away SS16 video games about two years ago and SS16 said he would smash the TV if DH tried it. SS has gotten violent in the past and hit DH or broken things when pushed.
For the most part DH just lets SS16 do whatever he wants which is basically watching U-Tube videos or sleeping. Thoughts
Failure DH Created This
SS16's dad failed him, you, and himself here.
Take the wi-fi cable at night & lock your door. Kick DH and violent SS16 out if they mantrum, threaten, or get violent. You don't have to live like this!
Budding failure to launch.
Budding failure to launch.
Sounds like your DH is a
Sounds like your DH is a terrible parent. Have you discussed with him where SS will be living once he turns 18 and let him know it won't be with you? If not, I would, because this kid doesn't sound like he's going to launch.
Very true... they become
Very true... they become failures to launch... and they might pretend they're launching by getting crappy jobs and failing and going to community college and coasting; but hey aren't launching.. they still hyper-depend on the BPs for food, housing, doctors, car insurance, cell phone bill, and still manipulate... it becomes a grey area and a plethora of bad decisions by the spawn supported by the Disney parents who in their dillusional minds convince themselves the leach is doing great in life and trying to decide what he wants to be - IMO they are a chump!
Sd has moved 3 hrs away to go
Sd has moved 3 hrs away to go to college to become an English teacher... like girl... you could do that at a much closer community College... but go ahead... I'm very much enjoying her being so far away!!! But she has NEVER gotten a job (besides watching a few kids of her mom's friend)... she I honestly think she'll likely either NEVER get a job... or she'll get a job and cry about how hard it is... she reminds me of the girl on the dr Phil show that CRIED when he told her she needs to get a job.
LOL my SS19.5 said the other
LOL my SS19.5 said the other day that beeing an adult is hard, that he wants to be coddled by mommy and not work nor go to school... mind you this is an arse that was claiming he was a matured man since he was 16, giving us sh$% and hard-time with his stupid behaviour. I said: welcome to adulthood, welcome to life.
Chore bitch them until they
Chore bitch them until they enlist. It works. The burning platform of working them all day every day, not paying them, and providing only shelter, food, and clothing tends to motivate them leaping from the burning platform with their tail feathers smoking and showering sparks.
Drill Instructors and then military NCOs are adept at getting young people to perform and contribute to a team. Which also tends to keep most of those kids from flare ups of chronic Cranio-Rectitis.
Oh, great. Then he will be
Oh, great. Then he will be "let loose" on the rest of us in society. This is irresponsible parenting, if you can even call it parenting. I'd be having a serious talk with DH with the intention of setting up a very specific plan re: handling SS's behavior, including setting and sticking to consequences. Kind of working on this a little too late, but better late than never.
setting and sticking to
setting and sticking to consequences... yep should be this way but Disney parents frown at SP that tries to hint at consequences for their adorable little teenage spawn... it seen as old-fashioned and too strict for my poor baby-man
Time to start making a exit plan
SS and DH Have a unhealthy relationship. This is going no where fast. SS will not be able to hold a job. And you can't live with him, so make plans to leave and let that crazy train roll on. Talk with a lawer. Get things in order you have two years to get thing ready for 18. And see who back DH has.
I don't know if I'd say
I don't know if I'd say budding psychopath... but I don't know his personality. I do think that DH needs to somehow get him to listen to him/ want to help out around the house. I subscribe to the belief that to get respect/ show respect. And I don't subscribe to the belief fear =respect.
With your situation, I do feel at this point it would be really hard to fix this situation... impossible no... but it would be difficult.
Possibly having DH and SS sit down and talk about how SS is older, and DH wants to start fresh... but that it will take hard work on both sides to fix their relationship, but that DH WANTS a better relationship with him.
Nanny cams and document
Then you can call the police on him