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College Expenses - soon to be 19

Stressed19's picture
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So my daughter left my house without saying anything as soon as she turned 18 in Feb of 2021. Mom and I had 50/50 joint custody alternating every other week. My "adult" daughter stated she now wanted to live with mom and as she was an 18 year old adult could do so.... Text was distespectful, entitled and obviously guided and scripted by mom.

My daughter graduated in May never said a word. I attended ceremony anyway.

Fast forwarding mom got angry and stated she will file a motion to get me to pay college expenses? Can I be obligated legally???? 

 

 

 

lieutenant_dad's picture

Ask an attorney. In my state, unless it was already written into the CO before the kid turned 18, the likelihood is no. But, family court is a crapshoot, so it's best to ask a legal expert.

notarelative's picture

Married or not married may not matter. What matters is the law regarding custody orders and college in your state.

CajunMom's picture

Typically, in most states, CS ends at 19. New Jersey and a few others have some crazy CS laws. But for the most part, if it was not in the original Orders, she's out of luck. But definitely check with an attorney and get yourself ready. 

 

justmakingthebest's picture

Unless it is in your divorce decree to have parents cover college expenses, it is unlikely. College isn't a "right". At most you may have to give your financial info for FAFSA, but if she is living with her mom, you probably don't even have to do that since it is based off of household income. 

Also, your daughter is an adult, it will have to be her that sues you. Just remember you can be sued all day long, it doesn't mean she will win. This is some serious entitlement. If you get served, get a lawyer, don't fight alone. 

Cover1W's picture

Depends on your state. In ours, the BM or child CAN go to court! Of course only in cases of divorce. A child from an intact family cannot. Fun times.

There are rules though. In our state yes, the NCP parent can be forced to pay. However those payments go directly to the school AND the paying parent must have access to school records. If those are not followed then NCP doesn't have to pay. It ends at age 23 or 24 as well. And there's no stipulations that the child must treat the paying parent like a person or have any relationship with them. Completely a farce....makes me infuriated that these rules only effect CODs.

My OSD is PASd out for 5 years now and refused contact with her dad. She refused, along with BM, to discuss anything related to college but wanted him to pay something, with zero information about how much she needed or what help she got from the school or family. He said no, only if you discuss this with me like the adult you think you are and any parent would expect. She refused. So no money from DH. Luckily it's not in their PA. But they could open a case if needed. Always a worry.

Rags's picture

Of course your specific CO or Divorce Decree trumps the state guidlines.  Be careful what you sign and agree to.  It is far better in most cases for the NCP to stand on a demand that the CO comply with the jurisdictional regulations.

https://dadsdivorce.com/articles/child-support-age-of-emancipation-in-yo...

Most States are 18, some 19, some as high at 21.  There are caveates for some States.

In our CO (Oregon) it ended at 18. The supplemental County rules stipulated that it could continue until age 21 if the kid is a full time college student in good standing with their school.  The difference after age 18 or HS graduation, whichever was the later, was that as a college student CS ceased to got to the CP and went directly to the kid.

SS chose to let them off of the hook.  They had been guilting him for years that the CS they paid on him starved his three younger also out of wedlock Spermidiot spawned half sibs by two other baby mamas.

Know your CO, know your Divorce Decree, know your State regs, know your supplemental jurisdictional rules. Use them all to protect yourself and keep the toxic blended family opposition pummelled into submission.  You are the parent. You know what is best for you and your children.  Do not abdicate your psotion to the opposition, and keep in mind that with fairly little ability to enforce a decree unless you are in the courtroom the Judge is far less an issue than most tend to believe.

The CO, Decree, regulations, rules and even the courts are your best tools to protect yourself. Keep your head in the game, give no quarter, and protect yourself and your child(ren).

IMHO of course.

 

 

Ispofacto's picture

It's not called CS.  According to another page, for my state:

In Illinois, the court may, in its discretion, order parents to contribute to their child’s college expenses. Illinois law refers to this financial responsibility as “non-minor support.”  While the Illinois statute governing non-minor support does not make it a mandatory requirement that parents contribute to their child’s college expenses, it has become customary for judges in Illinois to commonly order parents to do so.