My last post I shared our vacation dilemma and we ended up going but she didn't come (thank the gods!) It was a nice time. Towards the end I could tell husband had regrets and he called her before we left to head home. I overheard him saying he wants her to come to our home for Thanksgiving. Of course, I'm naturally going to be stressed about her presence. I don't even know how to be around her. Since she's left I haven't spoken to her not once. I don't contact her grandmother because I've told my husband I'm not making any decisions regarding her now or in the future. I don't want any part of it because no matter what I do I will always be the one who messed it up. At least that's how it feels sometimes.

Without her here it's been so peaceful and we've managed to run our business super effectively and find time to have fun. There is no awkwardness or stress like before. The thought of even spending a weekend with her around just really isn't my idea of R&R that we can so rarely find in our busy life.

But whatever. I don't see any way to get out of it. I'm going to have a convo with my husband to let him know I'm not going out of my way to be kind to her. I'm not going to initiate conversation and definitely not feel guilt for her bad choices that resulted in my disdainful reactions. I stand by everything. Is that petty of me?
 

She hadn't changed a single bit in her time away. Last weekend she called her sister and all Jane did was brag about how awesome school is and all the activities she gets to do. Not once showed any interest or concern for het younger sister except for why her younger sister had her phone taken away for a week. Jane never asked her sister how school was, how she was doing, nothing. When her sister tried to tell Jane about what she's been doing she said 'Oh' and went on talking about herself. I know teens are selfish but Jane is on another level. No one matters as much as her and all those who might be doing better than her in her miserable existence must be brought down. 
I asked her sister if she thought Jane cared about her, her response was "No, not really" That's how everyone feels. 
I can't stand it. Ugh. Everything else in my life is great but just thinking about her makes me angry. I hate that she has that power over me. Maybe I need counseling.