And replies with "if you do not put our son on that flight, i will be taking you to court for contempt of court and seek reimbursement/damages from you for the full costs of flights you illegally refused to put our son on"

he needs to nail this hcgubm biatch and play hardball. Lay down the law on this idiot

Absolutely what the others have said. She needs to know that under no uncertain terms that none of this is up for negotiation.

This would be custodial interference and parental kidnapping- make sure your lawyer adds that in and that if he isn't on the plane out of there you will pursue criminal charges against her, not just contempt. 

Honestly right now I think she is strutting like a peacock trying to make it seem like she has a say in this and can control the situation, She doesn't, I think she will bow down regardless because if he misses the flight she is on the hook to get him home and we all know she can't afford that last minute flight! 

Comment back to me stating that she would not put him on his return flight, your DH needs to stand his ground and tell her if she does not put him on his return flight then she will be in contempt of the court order. 
 

Personally, I think BM is just trying to get her way. If your DH changes to the dates she wants she will continue this type of behavior on anything and everything to get her way. Your DH is simply exercising his right to arrange the transportation. Sounds like he even tried working with her to compromise, but she wouldn't compromise so your DH made the decision. 
 

he should tell her "I tried to compromise and arrange flights that worked for both households. You would not compromise in accordance to the court order on the division of SS's break days. Therefore, I have exercised my right according to the court order and booked SS's flight. If you refuse to put him on his return flight, you will be in contempt of the court order and I will be forced to file contempt."

Tell her to buzz off.

IF she refuses to comply with court order your lawyer is prepared to file for every possible relief available to include: all court and your lawyer fees. AND she may loose what little visitation she has.

In the mean time, double check wording in court order:

 7 nights would be 7 sleeping nights in a bed at moms, depart on 8th day.

7 days would be 6 sleeping nights in a bed at moms, depart on 7th day.

Sorry about all this.

On court order days.  In the second half of the break. SS will be arriving at X date must be on flight on Y date to be in school on z date.  That how it is 

We had to do this same crap and smack the SpermClan around for this manipulative toxic bullshit.  They played the "our visitation does not start until he arrives after his air travel and he flies the day after our visitation ends"

.  They  played the don't put him on the plane thing as well.   So, we filed a petition for clarification from the court.  Here is the outcome. (in bold)

IT IS HEREBY ORDERED:

1.         That at all times in which the petitioner and respondent live within 200miles of each other, respondent shall have visitation with his minor son, XYZ, date of birth XX/XX/XXX, pursuant to XXXX County Supplemental Rule 8.085.

2.         That at all times which petitioner and respondent live more than 200 miles from each other, respondent will have visitation with his minor son, XYZ, as follows:

a. During 1994, respondent shall have visitation from September 25 through October 8 and from December 11 though December 22.

b. Beginning in 1995 and continuing through the summer of 1998, respondent will have visitation as follows:

               (1) Two weeks in March.

               (2) Four weeks in the summer.  After two weeks of respondents visitation has passed, petitioner shall be entitled to up to ten days of visitation in the area where the respondent is residing.  Respondent's four week visitation will be extended by the number of days which the petitioner has the child in the middle of the respondents four week summer visitation.  For example, if after the respondent has had two weeks of summer visitation, petitioner visits with her son in the respondent’s area for six days, then after the child is returned to the respondent, he shall have two weeks remaining visitation.  Respondents’ summer visitation shall not include the minor child's birthday on consecutive years.

              (3) Two weeks in September or October

              (4) December 11 through December 22.

               (5) For seven days of respondents choosing, provided the seven days visitation is not within two weeks of any other visitation, and that the seven day visitation takes place in the child's area of residence.

c. For the period beginning on the date school starts in 1998 and continuing there after as follows:

              (1) A five day weekend visit in September or October after September 15th in the area where the child resides so that the child may attend school during the day.

              (2) On even numbered years, winter visitation beginning on the day school gets out until December 24; and on odd numbered years beginning on December 26, until the day before school starts.

              (3) Every spring vacation pursuant to XXXX County Supplemental Rule 8.085.

              (4) Five weeks in the summer; after two weeks of respondents summer visitation has passed, petitioner will have up to ten days of visitation in the area in which respondent is residing.  Respondent’s five week summer visitation will be extended by the number of days which petitioner has the child in the middle respondent’s five-week summer visitation.  Respondent’s summer visitation shall not include the child’s birthday on consecutive years.

            d. Respondent shall inform petitioner in writing at least 60 days prior to any visitation he intends to exercise.  The notice shall include the dates he intends to exercise visitation.  Petitioner shall respond in writing to respondent within 15 days of receipt of notice as to whether or not she will exercise visitation in the middle of the respondent’s visitation, including the dates and number of days the intends to have the minor child.

e. Times for beginning and ending visits shall be flexible to accommodate transportation arrangements.  Visits shall end after an amount of time less than or equal to the period provided in this order.  Thus, for example, a visit from September 25 through October 8 is a visit for two weeks, and petitioner shall be entitled to the return of the child after 336 hours (24x14) has passed since the petitioner released the child to the care of the respondent.  Said differently, petitioner shall be entitled to return of the child on the final day of the visit, at or before the time at which she released the child to the respondent’s care on the first day of the visitation.

3. The cost of transportation for all visitations shall be handled by the parties as follows:  Each party shall be responsible to provide transportation to bring the minor child from the child’s location to the party’s location.  For example, Mr. DickHead shall arrange and be responsible for the child’s transportation to Mr. Dickhead’s residence for visitations.  Petitioner shall arrange and be responsible to provide transportation back to her residence.  This may include any acceptable transportation including transportation by grandparents.  Each party shall cooperate in making travel arrangements for the child’s return, including driving the child to the airport, if necessary.

Documentation, confrontation, and control is often the most effective way to protect a SKid, and a blended family marriage from the toxic opposition.   Do not let this toxic BM have one second of respite from having her ass bared for her toxic manipulative crap.