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I know it’s stupid but trying not to react

Cookieboom's picture

Submitted by Cookieboom on Fri, 07/02/2021 - 9:39pm

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Hi all,

BF is seeing SS tomorrow court ordered.  BM already tried to sabotage it by having SS text him that he wanted to do something with his friends (BM was home at the time).  BF said no, we are hanging out.  SS waited until BM wasn't home to say ok.

Now to why I'm peeved...BF had all of my Tupperware.  He has had them for a while and gave them back tonight.  After dinner I offered leftovers and he said he would take them tomorrow night.  Obviously he doesn't want SS seeing them.  Wtf. I let it go because I know he is really stressed out but I gotta tell you all, if he goes back to the life according to BM/SS, I'm outta here!!!!

 

Cookieboom's picture

Submitted by Cookieboom on Sat, 07/03/2021 - 3:30am

I think he doesn't want SS seeing my Tupperware.  He hasn't seen him in a year and the last time he saw him, SS told him to dump that "skank" or he would never see him again. In the past he would destroy my gifts given to BF, threw and damaged a photo of BF and I, and brought home baked goods that BM made (she never baked until after I did) and demanded I not touch them.  Also had rules fir BF that I was not allowed in the house and couldn't park in the driveway.  Like I said, they haven't seen each other in a year and are meeting tomorrow.

EvieLou's picture

Submitted by EvieLou on Sat, 07/03/2021 - 4:08am

SS sounds like a charm! 
 

BF needs to tell him straight if he's serious about you.  If he won't, then he's not.  

You shouldn't have to hide away - what kind of future are you going to have?  Think you need to have a honest talk with your BF, because if he's going to hide your existence from his son - you need to get out.  Sooner rather than later.  Make it clear you won't accept that.

Good luck.

 

Cookieboom's picture

Submitted by Cookieboom on Sat, 07/03/2021 - 5:29am

He's 13. We've had these discussions before and when I put my foot down, so did BF and that's when BM and SS upped their antics and she refused contact with SS, had BF arrested.  Has refused judge's ordered.  It seems BF cowers down to them and I made it clear in therapy that If things go back to the way it was I'm gone. Therapist has been working with him on this, but he hasn't seen SS in a year and I'm hoping he doesn't fall back into the same pattern.  I won't know how everything lays out until after the visit, but I could tell BF was stressing and the Tupperware thing is sooo obvious as he has had it a long time and gives it back now? Plus got real nervous when I offered to pack up leftovers, guess what he's not getting them tonight!!!

Cookieboom's picture

Submitted by Cookieboom on Sat, 07/03/2021 - 7:37am

That is what it seems to me.  I have not said anything as I don't want to start a huge fight right before he has his visit, so I am going to watch for more of the same pattern and go from there.