Hi! It's been a long time since I posted. Last time I posted it was chaos in my home as SD13 randomly left to BM's house with no warning or even assumption from us. We never really got an answer as to why & I personally texted BM to let her know she was a pos mom & that I know she's going to fail (4 years of listening to what she did to my step sons & SD really had me heated). The house she lives in is very poor conditions no a/c, no heat, roaches, black mold, ect. She spends all her money on designer items, clubbing, casino ect. Well SD14 went to live with BM when she was 13 on Labor Day 2020 after she had been living with us full time since the start of the pandemic. She did not talk to us for a long time after everything happened & was not going to school at all, was posting inappropriately online (nothing too far just not really not nice outfits for a 13 year old) all under her mom's knowledge. Well a few months ago SD starts contacting us again and came over a few times, first to meet her newborn baby sister & a few times after. We confronted her about coming back once & she cried, really hard. Harder than I've ever seen anyone cry before. & she wanted to go back to her moms. Well fast forward again to last weekend & we noticed she deleted me on Facebook. She was going over to my MIL house that same day so we went over too. We asked her why she did that like what happened & she busted into tears saying she needs a break from DH. Confused he asked why & she said she didn't know & that is what her mom is telling her & that her mom said she can't have anything to do with me anymore. She also told us when she initially left to go with BM they basically kept asking her what was wrong so many times to manipulate it into seeming like something WAS wrong. They took her phone & pretended to be her texting DH & I. (This was obvious too because the texts weren't the way she texted) also when she went that day it was not in her intentions to move back with BM she was just going to visit. She also spoke about the time she was already living there and we made SS15 & SS13 go visit BM (they want nothing to do with her) & How BM tried doing to SS15 what she did to SD. That she was trying to hold him in this room & basiclly manipulate & guilt trip him into staying with her. SD told BM to leave SS15 alone and SD got slapped in the face. SD also was talking about wanting to come home that she made a mistake. BM is constantly randomly insulting me to SD calling me fat, and whatever else. & SD says it's so awkward that there's no reason for my name to even come up. BM also stopped getting SD her depression meds & didn't take her back to the dentist like she was supposed to to get her last cavity filled (I took her to get the other 4 filled already). We called SD today to see if she was coming over this weekend & she says BM was pissed that DH dropped off SD last weekend back to her house & that SD isn't allowed to come to our house or be around me. So she asked if DH would pick her up at MIL's house so she can stay with us for the weekend. She is planning on packing as much stuff as she can today & then later this week she is going to go pack the rest & have DH pick her up. BM is NOT a rational person she is extremely manipulative, toxic, a pathological liar & just genuinely the worst to the point where SS's want nothing to do with her. Unfortunately SD a also has the lying trait so we are kind of stuck. We told SD that BM will definitely retaliate so she needs to be sure this is where she wants to be permanently. She confirmed she wants to be here because she misses being a kid that BM treats her like she's a grown woman.

DH & BM have 50/50 custody as to be decided by the parents. When SD left and SS's told us they didn't want to go back with BM ever DH went over to BM's house to talk about what to do. BM said we can have the boys if she can claim SD & SS15 on taxes. So this is very clearly a money thing & SD was easiest to manipulate. should we prepare with a lawyer before SD even comes? Is any of this a good idea? I will not be taking any part in picking SD up or anything as I know this can quickly be turned on me. Any advice, similar stories, or words of encouragement would be wonderful.