It’s seems that things are not getting any better!  I feel like I am a visitor in the house!  I am never comfortable there anymore and look for any reason not to be there!  I have tried to leave before and he got violent and forced me out of the house in my nightgownin the middle of the night.  He trashed me on social media and wouldn’t let me get any of my belongings including two of my vehicles which he locked in a six ft. Fenced yard.    I should have saw all the RED flags before we got married.  However,at that time we were getting along so good, the SD wasn’t living in his home and said she was NEVER coming back there.    

I had given DH a trip to see the Atlanta Braves play,  awesome seats, 5* hotel forge weekend of the 4th.  He had planned to give SD HER car back before we left for our trip and she was to stay home by herself because she had to work.  He had taken her car when she had left home to live with his sister and he told her that she would have to prove to him that she deserved her own vehicle by working and taking some responsibility with chores around the house.  Needless to say he justified her not picking up behind herself or doing any chores by her being tired because she was working, basically the only thing she had to do to get her car back was work a part time job!  She didn’t have to work on Friday and Saturday so she ran the road and hung out with her friend, she on,y worked 4 hours on Sunday and went for interview at another job, she told her DADA ( that’s what she still call her dad) that she had gotten the other job, and was going to quit the one she had, he said she had to work a 2week notice and then she could start the new job.  In fact she had nit gotten the other job,  the manager that talked to her is a long  time friend of mine and she told me that the SD was told she had to be 18 to work there.  So now all she is doing is eating, sleeping and hanging out with her friend, he lets her do wagatever she wants to do, and he cleans and picks up behind her like she is an infant.

While we were in Atlanta she  called him, texted and FaceTimed him no less than 50x’s a day.   One time while at the game he text back and asked her was everything alright he couldn’t answer the phone right then, she texted back that everything was good to call her.  He didn’t immediately call her then she started texting and calling me, I turned my phone off.  Nothing was wrong she just wanted to tell him something that could have waited.  It seems that everytime we go out, she will still be asleep at 5pm when we leave and he will leave her a note, but as soon as we leave she will start calling and texting, we can’t have anytime alone without her constantly interrupting.  I asked him what was wrong one time and he said nothing she just wanted to know where we were, she has us on 360 and can see exactly where we are at all times. Sometime all she will say when she callers is hey”.   He doesn’t seem to think that it is a problem for us to contact him 10-20 time while we are out for possibly 2 hours.

i have started looking for somewhere to just leave everything an run away to.  I am going to have to have a fresh start.  I am letting this 16 year old psycho child and her blind DADA runme away from my life.

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I really at times wonder why I am still with my husband.  Things have not gotten better in fact they have gotten much worse!  The only answer I have is that I love him .  Yes! Even though it is evident that he is never going to put me first!  He is never going to keep the boundaries I set from the very start!

In addition to asking him to revere our bedroom and our bathroom as his and mine and was off limits to anyone else.  When she starting dating at 16  and two weeks later her 18 year of boyfriend shoes up with hickies down both side of his neck  disappearing down into his shirt.  My husband and I talked and I at that time I  expressed that “our” house was full enough and that no one else would live here which he was more than agreeable with.  

The SD was working partime,  one job to another and only halfway doing that and still doing virtual school,   some anyway.  I really quite honestly don’t know how she passed but I think that during virtual school the teachers just let everything slide.  This was all until mid 2022,  when I told my husband that I felt his daughter was pregnant and he in denial told me that she was not, that is the only rule he had given her was not to bring any babies here!  

He apparently asked her and they had a huge Argument,  she moved out to live with her boyfriends  family!!!!!!  Hallelujah!  Even at this time he would not tell me that she was expecting and that she wanted her boyfriend to move in with us.  He said he could. To so she moved out to prove that she was going to get her way one way or another.  What a Sweet, Blissful two weeks it was!!!  One day in late July  when I came home from work SD had returned and she and her boyfriend had dinner with us.  The next morning I woke up to exercise before work and when I went into my exercise room there were boxes all in that room, and I noticed that the boyfriend had slept over, which had never happened before and was a taboo also discussed husband and myself.  I didn’t say anything about it to husband that morning as he was still asleep, but asked about it at lunch that day and husband didn’t really reply with anything of than “they are grown”. No they are not!  He may be almost 20, and still unemployed, but she was only 17 and I didn’t condone  that behavior with my now grown children  when they were that age or any age while they were under my roof.  It wasn’t until after I asked the third night that boyfriend stayed over that husband finally said that I must be simple minded or something and that they she was pregnant and they both were going to live with us.  He said that’s why she moved in with her boyfriends family, husband never asked her to leave but said he couldn’t live with us.  So she moved in with her boyfriends family, and only  came home because she said “they treated her bad there”. Later I was told by boyfriends stepmom, that they asked her to leave because she was a monster!!!  Finally someone else saw SD as she really is, unfortunately not  my husband!  When they came back home I told him that the baby was theirs and they would have it in the room with them

Things were bad but got much worse after her 18th birthday.  Apparently, at some point in time, husband told SD that she could have my exercise room which is also my home office for a nursery.  The 8th of December I went in to walk treadmill,  and there was baby stuff, bassinet, changing table etc all stuffed in the tiny room.  When I asked him he said it wa temporary unttil they got her room straight and were able to out it in there, so I moved it out of my to the back wall so I could get acces to the room.  That day She blew a fuse and said that my husband had told her when they came to live with us that she could have that for the babies room!  At that time husband told her that the baby had to sleep in her room with them and the room had been given to me years ago because at that time I needed a home office.  I told husband if they needed somewhere to put baby  stuff they could line it up along the back wall but nit to cover the windows That night husband and I went out of town, and as always she was constantly texting him, he told me that they were getting the babies stiff out of that room and cleaning it up.  When I went to walk treadmill the next morning the room was set up like a nursery and all my belongings were pushed to the back wall and she out things that had been on the shelf in boxes and stacked the on table going way above windows.  I moved everything back to the way it was and placed baby stuff neatly on back wall.  That didn’t go over well with SD who threw a fit while I was at church that morning.  Since then she is constantly doing thing to irate me,like putting her snow boots that have sat by the back doo pr for years in front chair I sit in when I work for home, or sitting her basket of cleaning supplies in the middle of the doorway into the room.  Apparently, husband has promised her that room again!  I have heard her ask him if he has talked to me about that room being the babies room yet, and telling him that he has promised!  I have also seeen some of her texts asking when he was going to talked to me about that room and that he promised he would to me after the 1st.  She has threatened several time to move out but she always returns.  I am so afraid that he is going to side with her yet again.

Nit to mentioned while we were out out town last weekend she texted him asking could she take a bath in our bathroom and his reply was to make sure she left it like she found it,  I’m fighting a loosing battle!  I pay all the household expenses, he keeps his while disability check plus he gets one for her.  I feel like he is using me but can’t bring myself to leave again.  Last time I did he sold all my belongs or hid them at other peoples houses and I had nothing but the clothes on my back.  Not of the appliances or furniture I out in this house not even pictures of my children!