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She thinks she owns him!

Biostep7777's picture

Submitted by Biostep7777 on Sat, 06/12/2021 - 4:32pm

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Blended Family Issues

I can't take it. No matter how much we ignore her, BIFF her, pay zero attention to her, no matter how much he says "no" to her ridiculous requests she STILL doesn't stop acting like she's his wife and he needs to do as she says. She even said "we need to show the kids that things are the same as from when we were married" she is in some weird competition with me that I want nothing to do with. I have ZERO contact with her and ZERO desire to be in some psychotic  competition with her. I have no doubts about where my husband's heart and mind is. We both just want her to leave us alone! DH does the bare minimum of what is legally required and nothing else. It's been months and she still says things like "you need to give me your medical records for the well being of the children" or "you need to tell me when you are traveling for work for the well being of the children" or "you need to communicate daily with me for our children's well-being" or "you need to demonstrate that we can show the kids that things can be the same as when we were married" I'm sick to death of it. She absolutely doesn't get the hint and I don't think she ever will. She is desperate for his attention. Her attorney told my attorney that she was adamant about having me deposed even though he is not really ok with it. We all know it's just to get information and cause issues and try to insert herself in our lives. No matter how much we try to keep her out she pushes and pushes and pushes her way trying to get through. She can't stand that he's not paying any attention to her and she literally will.not.stop. How the hell do we deal with this?? She is pathetic! I know people say they eventually back off. I'm telling you. She won't. It's been 5 years and she still tries everything she can to get him to pay attention to her. 

Cookieboom's picture

Submitted by Cookieboom on Sat, 06/12/2021 - 9:34pm

You are going through this.  BF had the same situation, with BM acting like they were still married.  That has changed alot though, but when BF put up boundaries she stopped letting him see SS.  But his attorney is working on it...I think you need a new attorney.  My BF's attorney is great, he had the judge tell BM at the emergency custody hearing that she is not to talk about me or mention me in court ever again as  I am of no basis to the custody and have nothing to do with the custody of SS.  BM had nothing to say!! Sat there like a mouse, hid behind her attorney and refused to look anyone in the eye.  

When we were going through this we were told that its not that BM thinks they're still married, its that she can't stand the fact that BF is happy and she is miserable (She left him for a married man, who went back to his wifey and now shes alone)....Something to ponder...hang in there!!!

Biostep7777's picture

Submitted by Biostep7777 on Sat, 06/12/2021 - 9:51pm

Yeah same thing. She left DH did the neighbor thinking the guy was going to marry her. It was just fun for him though snd wants nothing to do with her now she's pissed. 

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Sun, 06/13/2021 - 9:08pm

Smack her with a rolled up copy of the CO and commumicate only via OFW.

Lather, rinse, repeat.

Biostep7777's picture

Submitted by Biostep7777 on Sun, 06/13/2021 - 10:55pm

He does. Only OFW. Even when she says "please text me if you need to get my agreement on something" he ignores her and only communicates through OFW. She literally never gets the hint. It's insane to me. She needs so badly to be relevant in his life and he just wants nothing to do with her. She doesn't get it 

Findthemiddle's picture

Submitted by Findthemiddle on Mon, 06/14/2021 - 9:15am

I get how this is driving you bananas- truly. I am sorry this is happening to y'all.  

FinallySkidFree's picture

Submitted by FinallySkidFree on Mon, 06/14/2021 - 9:19am

She sounds like my DH's BM. That psycho ho bag was so annoying that when Dh would ignore her texts and calls, she would have HER MOM text and call him. He would ignore her ass too. Then she would go thru SS. When that wouldn't work she would call MIL or SIL or BIL and have THEM try and relay messages. IGNORED. We have been together almost 21 years. He FINALLY blocked BM on his phone 7 years ago. SD was still 14 at the time but she had stopped visiting. He felt there was no need to comunicate any more once SD stopped coming for his parenting time. Life changed once that contact was completely severed. He lost his daughter in the aftermath, her PASing worked on SD. He barely speaks to her. It is what it is, you can only do so much. Take this womans power away. IGNORE IGNORE IGNORE.

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Mon, 06/14/2021 - 11:30am

That he can only be with one of you.  If he lets the BM control his life he will be alone with her.  No one is going to put up with this crap.   He must follow his lawer advice.  Him not doing it , shows some bond with BM. He doesn't eant to break, sorry about that. 
Why pay a lawer, if you don't follow there advice.??  He's shooting himself in the foot

Biostep7777's picture

Submitted by Biostep7777 on Tue, 06/15/2021 - 12:32pm

Oh she controls nothing. He doesn't bother with her at all. I am not upset with the way he's handling things. He does the absolute bare minimum communication as lawfully necessary. It's her. She just keeps trying. There is no bond. He avoids her at all possible costs. Lol!! He dodges her every chance he gets. I just don't understand how this woman doesn't understand that we want nothing to do with her. 

AgedOut's picture

Submitted by AgedOut on Tue, 06/15/2021 - 12:48pm

I think you have to train yourself to let the anger go after a few minutes and focus instead on the humor of it all. a grown assed woman thinking she can boos aorund her ex husband and control his happy new life. it's a little humorous and a lot pathetic.