Wow, it's been a long time since I last posted a blog. Can't believe I've been a member for over 9 years... Thinking back to what brought me here and then to today, I'm amazed at how much has happened and yet remains the same... Present day, I have SD22, DD20, and SD17, married going on 15 yrs. I'm soooo grateful we had to move 3 hrs away for work and there is distance now between us and BM. SD17 has her driver's license and has made the trip down so literally no need to see BM anymore.

I'm posting today just bc I finally reached my limit with SD22 and want to petty vent, LOL. I would say out relationship started to get rocky when she was a senior in high school and was only interested in getting high... She's still a major pothead but at least I don't have to worry about her choices since it's not on my dime. (Full disclosure, we are not in a recreational state so it is illegal) She has a good job making more money than most her age and is doing well so whatever..

Anyway, this past year at Christmas she came for her less-than-24 hr gift grab. Which, to be fair, since she's usually high when she gets here and just sleeps, it's more of a nuisance than any conflict. I've learned to ignore it. For gifts, I am the shopper of the family and I have issues with restraint. For SD22, I was especially pleased this year bc I printed a family recipe, got all the dry ingredients, the appliance to cook in, and a grocery gift card for the non-perishables as her main gift. My favorite is stockings and in our house, that's where the really great gifts are found, gift cards, jewelry, nice expensive stuff... 

This year, SD22 got me 4 bottles of bottled water. You can't even make this up....

I mentally made note after year 2 of this type of "gift giving". I'll leave it up to DH to handle her gifts moving forward. Then came my DH birthday.. SD22 can barely remember to wish him happy birthday, forget either of his DNA getting him a gift. His feelings were a bit hurt but I made sure to shower him with attention.

DD20 got DH a tshirt from her college. She's a "broke" college student and wasn't prompted by me so I was especially proud of her. My 40th was a few days later and he made a point of reminding his DNA days in advance and even the day before to at least send me a text. SD17 sent a sweet message on my bday and SD22 nada... My DD drove down 2 hrs from college just to spend the night to be here for my bday. Next morning, she shares SD22 was very active on social media the prior day. I just smile and nod and continue on with my delicious mother/daughter brekkie. After a long day at work, I shared my feelings about SD22 with DH. He completely understands and is feeling not so great about how his kids treat him as well. He even broke down and got an iPhone so he could FaceTime and they rarely pick up. Anyway, I decided to block SD22 on FB (not that she and I are friends but his family is very active on it). Oddly, 5 min later I get a belated "happy birthday" text with an apology that she was sooooo busy that she forgot. I really wanted to ignore it and her but decided to be the adult and say thank you. I'm pretty much done at this point and DH supports my position that SD will not be receiving the level of gifts, money, etc, until she matures enough to understand that you have to participate in a relationship. DNA does not afford you the right to treat someone poorly and still expect the same treatment as everyone else. 

Just another blog to demonstrate that it does not get better as they get older... Distance does help though! I'm just so glad we don't have to deal with a pregnant kid at this point bc seeing some of those posts give me nightmares of future possibilities....