Advise to cope with the stressful feelings step daughter coming with us on cacation
Hello
We planned for a vacation me, my husband and his son. My husband asked his daughter 14 years who live by her mom to come with us. I'm in a very stressful mood. My husband is making her closer and closer. He told My that her way of thinking and her mind worth all kids in the family. This is tge girl that she told me if I have a baby she will stap jis head or flush him in the toilet to see jow he dies. I know she was a kid., yet I'm in the fertility treatment journey and honestly I lost 3 babies in my prevoius marriage one of them in toilet- sorry to share this with you- the feeling sucks.
I have all negative thoughts in world. I can't seek psychological counseling because his ex had the bipolar and my husband is sensitive to this.
Scared to death, my husband started to be close to her and planning to let her live by us.
It would be absolutely
It would be absolutely natural for a parent to want their child to be close to them and to live with them. I guess it's hard to really know whether his daughter really meant what she said.. or just said something horrible because she was upset about him possibly having another child.still angry about the breakup of her parents. it seems that he has quite a few.. with more than one woman...
In your last post, you seemed concerned he was cheating on you... do you still think that?
Further, you should not need his permission to get counseling if that is what you think you need.
Kind of
Like whenever I come across him while he is on Facebook most of the time he stares on women pictures and profiles. His ex accused him cheating on her as well. His sister told me that he loved a lady while he was married to his ex. I feel like he likes to draw attention of ladies.
I know that parent like to be close to their kids. I personally pray that his kids be nice to him. Yet, when I married him, he to me that if his kids are older and can take care of themselves, he wouldn't marry again. Afcourse this ended up with a big fight.. That's why I'm irritated from his id's
Had the Bipolar? That's not
Had the Bipolar? That's not something that goes away and if you are having to deal with that then you most definitely need counseling. So what if he's "sensitive ". You need to take care of yourself. At 14, she is not a "kid". She can think pretty well and to say that to you about your child points to a deep seated problem in her brain. Do you really want to have a child and be connected forever to this family?
The SD said this when she was
The SD said this when she was 7 ...
First time she was 7 and when
First time she was 7 and when she was 12 her brother 14 at that time, was visiting his mom and came back and told me " don't have babies my sisters said that they going to kill them" this what exactly what he told me.
This is scary.
This is scary.
Honestly I don't know what I would do if it was me at the receiving end of the threats, but I always believe it's wrong to dismiss these threats to harm, no matter where they are coming from. (example: he's not serious he's just a kid or she doesn't know what she's saying she's only 7)
By age 5 kids should know harming anyone in any form is wrong. I'm sorry you have to deal with this. You really should stay away with this girl. AND you should totally seek professional help. "Husband not liking it" is not a valid reason why you should not seek help.
for starters , your husband
for starters , your husband CANNOT dictate wether you can or cant seek professional help or not ,, if he was any type of decent husband and you are struggling , he would be taking you to a therapist himself ! And secondly ...i was diagnosed with bipoalr in 2009 and its certainly not what people assume it to be ,,, you dont just wake up in the morning in a good mood then fly off the handle at any random times ,, its a slow moving moood disorder and with the correct spousel support , its rarely an issue in a relationship. I call BS on your husband!! why would you want to be with a man that is quite willling to allowing you to struggle ?? PFFFT ,, sounds like he needs the therapist !!!
Please take care of yourself
Please take care of yourself and leave now. Get the help you need. Your DH cannot stop you from seeking therapy. If he even tries, he is obviously a POS and has no business in your life.
Add in his embracing this POS SD who throws around murder threats against her future younger sibling and there is no question that you need to not have a child with this idiot and you need to move on purging him and his shallow and polluted gene pool from your life.
Take care of you.