I am a firm believer in the human behavior perspective that "teh best indicator of future performance is past behavior".  

If there is an PO/RO in place against the XW there is a reason for that and it needs to remain in place in order to prevent her usual crap.

The Step world is full of people who continually believe that the toxic opposition will change and everyone will come together for the best interests of the SKids.  My DW was one of them for the first several years of our marriage.  She believed that if she did not rock the boat with the SpermClan that they would not take their frustrations out on the SKid when he was on SpermLand visitation.  Nope, the still put that kid through their manipulative bullshit every visitation.

After a number of years I finally sat DW down and told her it was time to go to war and walked her through the years of evidence of the SpermClan taking advantage of her being "nice" and still loading the SKid up with their toxic manipulative crap.   Instead of the usual "what do you want me to do about it" irritated tone she would usually take when we had similar discussions tears started flowing down her beautiful face and she told me I was right and it was time.

From that moment on she owned their toxic asses and made them suffer for their crap.  She destroyed them legally, financially and socially.  We tolerated none fo their usual crap and made sure that SS had the facts regarding the CO, the SpermIdiots arrest record, SpermGrandHag's crap, the supplemental jurisdictional rules regarding support and visitation, the State regulatons regarding support and visitation, and we made sure he did not have a penny of cash that they could take from him.  We gave him a debit card with $0 on it but that we could load instantly if he needed money.   THat was a lot of fun.  Several times over the years they expected SS to pay for fill their gas tank or pay for a meal for the whole family.... DECLINED!  

SpermGrandHag used to call my DW and go full banshee when she got stock out in the middle of nowhere with her idiot son's 4 all out of wedlock spawn by three different baby mamas because we refused to help her when SS was on SpermLand visitation.  The gas thing happened several times over the years, as did all of them sitting at a resaurant for hours waiting for SpermGrandPa to come pay for their meal because they all expected SS to pay for their crap.

You can certainly hope that the opposition will learn to be reasonable, but don't hold your breath.

Good luck.

DBDB got a restraining order over 15 years ago by lying in court and had her bbf's husband who is a cop at the time stand up for her in court.  

Typically in NJ if she has the order and is somewhere and DH shows up, he has to leave or she can have him arrested.

This is how this has worked over the years:  If we are at a sport event, she will show up and sit next to him, etc.  This has happened for all sports events she shows her face to as well as having us all sit at banquet tables cuz you know: its for the kids.

When SS18 was 12 Dh was asked to coach his baseball team. They have to do background checks and because of that order he was not able to coach.  The baseball league tried their hardest to make an exeption since they have seen us sit together for years and no problem, but the state said no.

DH asked DBDB to drop it so he can coach his kid, but she told him that her lawyer told her to tell him that she does not feel safe around him.  LOL BUT her lawyer drew up an agreement that if he did all the pickups, dropoffs, (we live 45 min from her), paid an extra $300 a month CS and all sports activities on top of all co pays for doc visits (he pays all their insurance) that she would drop it.    He told to her pound sand and that is the day he stopped talking to her.  They haven't had a real conversation except for one in regards to SS22 surgery in over 7 years.   She tried to come to my house to see SS22 after surgery and I said no - there is a restraining order and if she steps on my property I will call the police.  (he has thumb surgery so I wasnt being a douche).

I don't have any real advice except that it can be hard to get it dropped and can be frustrating as hell.   We once sat in the border control office for over 4 hours with SSthen14 crying because we were coming back from a vacation in Canada and it showed up.  Just crazy.