Still Not In School
SS16 is still not in school. SO talked to his lawyer today, who told him nothing can be done without custody papers. Supposedly the lawyer was going to try to contact BM's lawyer to see if an agreement can be worked out and she will sign SS up at the school where he lives.
Or something like that. I have had a busy day at work and when i left this morning, SO was supposed to be going to his lawyer's office. When i got a break at 11, i called him and he and SS were at the gym. They were planning to stop by the law office afterward. They stopped by and had the above convo, then went to lunch and the shooting range.
I told SO that i don't think he is understanding the seriousness of his situation. I think at the very least, he needs to go to the school in our town and try to register SS. At least it is showing he is making an effort to get him in. SS has a driver's license with SO's address, and he should at least have a copy of the temporary custody papers from 10 years ago. All BM had when she signed him up in her town was a child support check as "proof" of custody.
I'm livid. Can SO be arrested for keeping his kid out of school? School started a week ago. Truancy? CPS? I'm just waiting for someone to show up. BM texted SS and SO Friday telling him "Please go to school." She is building her case while SO sits and waits to hear back from his incompetent lawyer and SS gets further behind!
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I wouldn't worry too much
I wouldn't worry too much about a custody battle at that age. For the most part a 16 year old has a choice whom they go with. Reguardless that's only 2 years until he's an adult and can make his own decisions.
What is the legal dropout age
What is the legal dropout age in your area? Around here it's end of the school year that you turn 17 (state law is 16, but districts can push it up to 17 if they want, and most do).
I agree that no court is going to make SS16 go live with BM if he doesn't want to - this is more about SS10 and them fighting over who gets custody of him. What a piece of **** BM is, that she isn't raising her kid but wants the money for him.
Here it's 18.
Here it's 18.
Why is SO not driving him to
Why is SO not driving him to the school in BM's district? He has time to take SS to the gym and to the range, but not to school?
And doesn't SS drive? Why doesn't he drive himself? $1000 will get him a car that drives. Your SO can put that on a credit card.
This just sounds like tit-for-tat on your SO's part. At this rate, SS is going to be a 5th year senior in high school, which likely hasn't crossed his mind yet, especially if his time spent not in class is spent doing fun stuff.
He could drive to that school
He could drive to that school, but it's farther and it's not nearly as good of a school as the one in our district. That may end up happening, anyway. The latest i heard was that BM may be willing to drop him from her school and enroll him in the one in our district if they all go together. That's pretty much fitting with her MO. She has never cared for SS in her home (where she lives with her "husband"), but she liked going to SO's house, hanging out, and cooking meals for all of them. She only wants to parent SS when they can all be together as a family (and she's being paid.) I'm just fking done at this point. Not gonna ask more questions or offer any advice.
Like honestly, if having a
Like honestly, if having a family day together is the only way to get SS in school, they need to go ahead and do it. Her in SO's house and calling him 5 times a day was my only issue with her. I never gave a shit about the money (also, it's not my money.) He should probably go with her to enroll SS and just keep paying her.
Why is he not already
Why is he not already enrolled in school in SO's district?
So....SS was in school in SO
So....SS was in school in SO's district from K-8. Before 9th grade, they got the bright idea to enroll him in a magnet school in yet another district - the nearest major city. They used BM's mother's address, which BM apparently uses as her primary "government" address. She actually lives with a man she calls her husband but is not legally married to in this other town. So, they said SS lived with BM at BM's mom's. SS would get on the bus at grandma's, get off the bus at grandma's, get picked up and brought to SO's house for about 6 hours, then het brought back to grandma's to sleep. On weekends/summers/holidays, he was at SO's. BM had nothing to do with any of this. Honestly, i did the majority of the transports. That was 9th and 10th.
Before the beginning of 11th, SO enrolled him in another magnet school, since the first one wasn't as good as advertised, plus it was really far. This next magnet school is 3 hours away and SS was supposed to live in a dorm. Because of COVID, it was all online so he did all his work from SO's house. He failed too many classes and was dropped. Around October, SO also decided he was tired of paying BM for nothing, after he asked her to pay a small school fee and she refused. She is desperately trying to hold onto the CS, so she made this play to have him enrolled in her district, i guess, to try to establish a reason she should still be paid, though he has only stayed with her about 3 nights in the 2.5 years i've been around.
BM has legal custody. SS is
BM has legal custody. SS is enrolled in school there. Drop his A$$ off at BM's.
He has to make a choice
He has to make a choice whether he wants to have a relationship with her. I've said it to either you or someone else before: he wants a poly relationship with only the perks of a mono relationship. That's not sustainable.