Was I talking to you?
Anyone else deal with their skid thinking they need to be involved in every conversation you're having with SO? Anytime DH and I are having a conversation SD11 has to butt in with "Who? What? When? Where? Why? I want to see." I just want to snap every time with "Were we talking to you?!" I feel like it's another part of her mini-wife attitude and that's why it bothers me so much. I know younger kids are full of all kinds of questions but at 11 it just seems rude and annoying. Or is this just a kid thing in general?
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It might be a kid thing in
It might be a kid thing in general but pre-teens and teens are the worst about it.
I do tell my Bios and Step- Excuse me, I was speaking to my husband, if you need to know about it, we will tell you later.
Yep. Skids do this a lot.
Yep. Skids do this a lot. SS17 does this often if he is in the same room. It is annoying. Depends if they are doing it just to butt in or to be a part of the conversation. He does it to try to be involved.
It is the age and kid thing.
It is the age and kid thing. DS 11 does this all the time to me and DH. I will will be showing something on my phone to DH and DS11 is like I want to see. Or he tries to be involved in a converstion that is over his head by making osme off the wall comment. We say stop trying to be involved it does not concern you.
We simply ignore him if he is real bad with it. We also correct him saying he needs to politely interject himself. It is the age they think they know everything and want to know everything because they think they are soooo grown up.
It's pretty typical for kids
It's pretty typical for kids to interrupt and butt in to adult conversations, especially preteens feeling their oats.
But their parent needs to correct them whenever it happens.
That's the problem. No one
That's the problem. No one corrects her when she does it. Ugh
I agree that it is typical
I agree that it is typical for kids to interrupt but most parents correct that behavior early on. Like my 6yo tries to interrupt a lot but I always tell him to use his manners and either wait until the adults are done speaking or if it is urgent to say "excuse me" before he blurts out whatever. My 6yo doesn't interrupt nearly as much as my SD13. My SD13 CONSTANTLY interrupts and tries to butt into conversations b/c NO ONE has ever told her how incredibly rude it is or taught her otherwise.
Funny story though, one day my dad was at our place talking to DH, SD comes out of her bedroom the moment she realizes we have company and promptly interrupts my dad. My dad says, "HEY I WAS TALKING" in a loud, firm tone. SD practically ran back into her room (to pout of course) and I was just so proud of my dad! LOL!
Incredible how basic good
Incredible how basic good manners and common sense can go untaught, especially in divorce situations.
I was horrified to watch my teenage SD knock on her music teacher's front door... as she kept knocking until the teacher answered about a minute later. When I talked to her afterwards about how rude that was, she was genuinely baffled. No one had ever taught her to knock/ring and then wait at least 30 seconds before knocking again. And the common-sense awareness that it takes some time for the home resident to get to the door... nope, never occurred to her.
What I find even more
What I find even more incredible is how not only are they not taught common sense or good manners they are more often than not encouraged to behave badly b/c they get attention for it. In regards to my SD, BM and DH both act like her behavior is "cute" or "silly" or "funny" and if she interupts they don't say a word. I've watched MIL let her just interupt and no issues with it at all. Like she should def be able to interupt at any time b/c she is the center of the world
OMG, that is something my SD would do at the door. She has the most annoying behaviors like that. It is embarassing to me. I try to avoid going anywhere in public with her because it is always such a $hit show with SD front and center thinking she is cute!
Yes!
This is exactly what I'm talking about! I know it's a product of my DH and his guilty Disney dad parenting but it drives me insane! She is a child, we are the adults. She doesn't have to be involved in every little thing. It's called respect and manners. Why is that so hard to understand?
Love it!
That is awesome on your dad's part! I could totally see my parents doing something like that because SD has been nothing but rude and disrespectful to them since DH and I got together. It's been almost 4 years and she still acts like she couldn't care less about seeing them. It's ridiculous. At first they tried and now they've just accepted it and now have my BS to give all the attention to which is great!
I'm sure its part kid thing and part not
in our case GWR used to butt in all the time but it was because at Beaver's GWR is elevated to the same status an an adult. DH used to have to tell GWR all the time...we are not talking to you. When I want your opinion I will ask. Now go away.
It was rinse and repeat....rinse and repeat. My own bio's tried it a few times...but they got the hint when I told them to butt out and I would ask them for their opinion when I wanted it.
Unfortunately, yes.
Unfortunately, yes. Each time we argue, the adult SKs but in. I have told them to but out but finally stop. My spouse has said only once to stay out.
Same
My DH never says anything and I'd be the big evil SM if I were to say anything
Munchkin SD14
As sweet as she is, always has to insert herself into conversations or asks "what are you talking about".
Either myself or Dh ignore, or deflect. Ive had many many conversations with DH about this (I try not to criticize because he shuts down), and just tell him that we should just not talk about financial matters/personal business in front of her...
Because I know that she "collects and reports" information...so some of my reserve is taught by my parents, and some is self-protective from Toxic Troll.
Omg I can so relate. My
Omg I can so relate. My fiancé's son 11 does this all the time. When I was a kid we were raised to stay out of grown folks business. I expressed this to my fiancé that he needs to tell his son it's not okay, but I think he feels really guilty about everything so he never properly corrects him. I wonder if it's appropriate for me to say something? Of course my fiancé says it is okay for me to do so (probably so he doesn't have to take disciplinary action) but I'm not sure he'll feel so strongly once I do. I'm new here and so glad to give input but sorry it's not the most helpful advice *smile*
Welcome! I'm also fairly new
Welcome! I'm also fairly new here but have been reading posts for quite some time and finally decided to join when I felt like I was going to lose my mind! Ugh the guilty father crap is the worst. Does your fiancé normally back you up if you say something to his son? My DH has never been accepting of me having a disciplinary role with SD and it's definitely been a problem with our relationship. Being a SM is harder than I ever could have imagined!
Yep! Every single time SD13
Yep! Every single time SD13 is around.....all day long.
This just makes me feel sick.
This just makes me feel sick. This was one of the worst parts of my stephell. AdultSkid thinks he's a King and everyone exists to serve his wants. He would butt in to private conversations I was having with my children and my husband and it was horrific it was like living under siege.