OT - Throwback Thursday
I commented on Futuro's blog yesterday and it got me thinking about how I've changed in the last 3 months. So while this is not a traditional Throwback Thursday, it's a throwback to how things were for me BEFORE the pandemic and I'm wondering if I will be able to easily return to the old Aniki...
PRE-Pandemic vs POST-Pandemic
PRE: I thought nothing of going to the grocery store every week or dropping in to grab something small: a forgotten ingredient, a craving, a treat for DH...
POST: I use a substitute, recreate the recipe, make something completely different, or go without.
PRE: I never took a lunch break at work - typically ate at my desk.
POST: I take a break to spend time with DH. I still eat at my desk!
PRE: I rarely planned MY lunches (only DH's) and occasionally forgot mine at home, forcing me to eat in the crapfeteria.
POST: Not only are DH's lunches planned, I have my lunches AND dinners planned! Breakfast is winged. Except for the coffee.
PRE: I hit Walmart every 2-3 weeks to get necessities.
POST: I have Walmart delievered and was there for the first time in 3 months this past Saturday. It did NOT go well for me and I plan to continue online ordering or do without when possible.
PRE: Phone calls never bothered me.
POST: Too many Zoom conferences later, and I loathe it when the phone rings. In fact, I've been quite guilty of NOT answering calls and lying that I was doing something because I'm tired of being on the damn phone. It's so bad, that my sister (BFF) and I usually text or email. She knows how much these daily calls are irritating me.
PRE: Hitting a store at a peak time with lots of shoppers did not phase me.
POST: I now get panicky over "too many" people. I have ZERO problem maintaining a THIRTY foot distance. People who are within 10 feet make me edgy.
PRE: During barbecue/boating season, I eagerly awaited the invitations to annual events.
POST: I've been trying to think up 'reasonable' excuses to AVOID these events and our dear friends because the thought of being around ANYone has my anxiety on the rise. And this makes me feel awful and small and guilty. It also means that since my comfort level will be pretty damn low, I will FORCE myself to be outgoing so no one asks what is wrong, and be horribly mentally/physically exhausted afterwards. And that is how I usually feel after events I do NOT want to attend. After spending time with these friends, I typically feel happy and have a warm, fuzzy feeling inside.
PRE: While introverted, I never believed I'd be truly happy living off grid with little to no social contact.
POST: Call me Teddi because I'm starting to think Ted Kaczynski's lifestyle sounds pretty darn appealing... 
How about you? Are you ready to jump feet first into the lifestyle you had PRE-pandemic? Or do you feel like that's improbable/impossible?
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I don't want to go back to pre-pandemic
Eeek
Pre - up at 5:30 to feed dogs and get ready to be in the office by 7 a.m.
Post - up at 6:55 a.m. Just long enough to make coffee and roll downstairs to my desk. DH gets up at 5:30 to feed dogs and goes back to bed
Pre- having to get dressed and wear makeup
Post - I haven't worn makeup in 3 months. My skin has never looked better. I'm in my jammies till 10 a.m.....
Pre - Had to come up with excuses to stay home.
Post - NO excuse neccessary...I get to stay home and its acceptable now.
Pre - my dogs spent the day in the office with DH. (He has worked from home for the last 3 years)
Post - my dogs now get to spend the day roaming the house since I'm not stuck on the phone for hours on end like DH.
Pre - I ordered my groceries and sundaries from Shipt....I hate going out that much
Post - still order my groceries and sundaries from Shipt.
Pre - dinner wasn't done till 6 or later since I had to get home from work before I could start
Post - the 1 minunte commute from the family room to the kitchen makes dinner done by 4:45 - 5 p.m. every night
Pre - got guilted into the gym by DH. I HATE THE GYM...I mean loath it..
Post - Gym not open...and even DH is like..yea no I work out at home. I don't have come up with excuses.
I also loathe the gym. But I
I also loathe the gym. But I feel like my fat cells are ballooning. I've gained 2 pounds in 3 months and feel like I've gained 20. Ugh!
I have always avoided peak
I have always avoided peak grocery store times, especially at Wal-Mart. Just yesterday I confronted some broad for leaving her cart pushed right up next to my car instead of returning it literally three stalls away. I use the smaller chain grocery and avoid the mouthbreathers as much as possible.
I used to be able to laugh at the selfishness of asshole strangers. Not anymore.
The mouthbreathers..
I spit out my diet coke on that one...
The whole time in the store
The whole time in the store her three feral kids were beating each other with pool noodles. My 4 year old saw it and said, "They should have those toys put in the garage!" (That's where his stuff is banished when he's naughty lol).
They checked out as we did and the noodle fight continued into the parking lot where they rammed into a poor little old lady and nothing was said to her by the kids or "mom."
I stopped to check on the lady and we exchanged comments about manners. By the time I got to our car, she was at an SUV next to mine, shutting the hatch. I watched her give the cart a shove right into my car and walk over to the driver door. That was my last straw.
I said, "Seriously?" She looked at me like I spoke Portuguese. I said, "Man, I'm sick of garbage humans." And she started screaming about "how people are these days" and other things I couldn't understand through her shrieks and her kids yelling at her to stop.
I calmly walked her cart to the cart return. She's still raging her head off. I start to unpack my stuff into my car as she squeals out of her parking spot (still screaming incoherently), and I smiled and waved.
Evil Aniki would have shoved
Evil Aniki would have shoved that freaking cart back. Into the non-Portuguese mouthbreathers metallic shite carrier. While swearing in Finnish, Russian, German, Croatian... *diablo*
Pre - I had no motivation to
Pre - I had no motivation to exercise
Post - I am back running and working with weights and I feel better than I have in a long time
Pre - It seemed we never had any time for ourselves
Post - now we have plenty of time together and doing stuff with the kids
There are two people I can be
There are two people I can be around 24/7: my Dad and my DH. And since DH works a different shift, I enjoy this extra time with him. Even though he's an incoherent bear until after his second cup of coffee!
PRE Life is hectic
PRE Life is hectic
POST Life is hectic
I got nothing.
Different sorts of hectic?
Different sorts of hectic?
Life hasn't changed much for my DH. He still goes in Mon-Fri. The only difference for him has been that I'm home more.
Well
The working remotely was a blessing in disguise because I could work on my rental property quite a bit.
I do miss the PRE economy when everybody was working and too busy to overdose on drugs etc etc. I hate these stupid masks though they are uncomfortable itchy and probably cause a rash.
I foolishly thought I'd get
I foolishly thought I'd get things done around the house. The reality:
I'm working longer hours trying to compensate for all of the slowdowns to be "just as efficient". Even adding my commute time does not equal the hours I'm working, which sucks!
I heard someone say they were tired of people claiming they can't breathe. BS!!! My oldest sister had to stop going to the store because the damn mask brought on a full-blown asthma attack because she couldn't breathe! I miss 2019. LOL
When you spend enough time
When you spend enough time researching the facts in how it's transmitted, you can ease some of that anxiety. At least it does for me. I can't count on people looking out for me do I look out for myself. Bring outside with a slight breeze and distance is doable for me. If a few friends agree, maybe you could have a small gathering. Sharing utensils to serve food is not good, tailgating for your own family unit is better.
But then again , embracing the introvert inside is ok too.
My anxiety is simply that I
My anxiety is simply that I've become more introverted, which makes me less tolerant of being around people. I'm honestly not all that worried about covid cooties (counts here are veeeeery low).
People
Pre- Activities and festivals, live music, dancing and PEOPLE. In the flesh. DH fishing every weekend. Shopping trips just because. Boutique resale shopping, hats, Goodwill scavenging, listening to DH complain that I am bringing in the house another 2 bags of "stuff" that only cost me $20. Work is 8-5.
More Pre - hiking and finding reasons to NOT go into the crowded gymn. Berry picking. More dancing and festivals. More people. Weekend travels.
NOW - No people, no shopping just because, festivals canceled, live music canceled, Dh's fishing partner moved 2.5 hours north, purchased own boat so planning some cruises. Dancing in the living room after a few shots of whiskey. Dancing naked in the living room just because I can. Hiking and started running again. Dreaming of weekend travels. Masks everywhere. Home made masks and discount store bought, just MASKS. Riots. Statues toppled or put away for safekeeping. News is scarier.
Work is 8-5
CLove, I think you should
CLove, I think you should rework a mask into something meaningful to you and wear it while dancing naked in the living room.*dirol*
Pre- Socially awkward
Pre- Socially awkward
Post- I'll need to attend a six-week "How to Human" boot camp before I can be re-released into polite society!