I have done my absolute hardest to be a provider for my step daughter since marrying last July. Gone out of my way to do and say the right things. In spite of my SD15 being incredibly lazy, no work ethic, no self respect, and worst of all, completely molly-coddled by her mum!! So I find myself in a position where any comment or suggestion regarding my SD even if completely justified, just gets met with instant defensive behaviour from my wife. This to the point that my own needs and feelings are 'thrown under the bus' every single time and I'm sacrificed at the altar of my SD on every level. My issues include my SD expecting every to be done for her, not lifting a hand in any way to help in the home, invasion of my privacy by entering my and my wife's bedroom without permission (the ONLY place I have left to myself if I want privacy), the complete over indulging by her mum, the money my wife seems to just take it upon herself to spend on her (we both bring incomes in to the house), her complete lack of manners, her disrespectful behaviour towards her mother, and I could go on! But if I bring up any of these legitimate points because they are causing me hurt, or impacting on the environment I also have to live in, I am always considered in the wrong and met with immediate defensive reaction from my wife. I am at my wits end - how I'm the he'll do I deal with this????