BM taking the piss financially again
So yet again, BM has said DH has to buy skid new school shoes (this is the third time in a row now). She came up with some lame excuse to shunt her responsibilities again, like she also does with pick up and drop offs, etc. WTF do you think the £400 a month child support is for?!! That's more than enough to look after a kid. If you're squandering the money you're being given to pay for YOUR CHILD, to the point you can't even buy shoes for her, then you're doing something wrong. We're not paying for your lifestyle, we're paying for the upkeep of skid!
I'm sick of this woman constantly taking advantage of my husband. From the moment she first met him, he's been nothing but a walking wallet in her eyes. She'll take every penny that she can from him, and our son by reference. We know she can afford it (she delights in telling us how much money she gets in benefits on top of her job). She'll just try and get away with getting my husband to pay for everything instead.
What is it with BMs and them expecting a fortune in CS payments, and then having the barefaced cheek to ask for *demand* more?!
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He has to say no. He has to
He has to say no. He has to put his foot down. My DH can't do that, either, but it's the only way for it to stop.
Sounds familiar
It happens with my partners kids to. Pays child mat, still ends up with requests for beds, shoes, extras. It is ridiculous.
BM probably will never change
BM probably will never change but your DH can manage how he responds. For example:
BM: You need to buy the kid some shoes, clothes, etc.
DH: That is what the £400 CS is for.
BM: So you're not going to take care of your kid then?!!
DH: That is what the £400 CS is for.
That's it, then stop responding. I live in England too and £400 per month is quite a lot for one child. She would be just fine. The more your DH gives in, the more she'll take advantage.
If she tries the "send the kid to dad's in ratty clothes" game then buy clothes from Asda or Tesco etc. Keep them at your house, just enough to get through visiting days. When it's time for skid to go home, put him back in what he was sent in.
It's a shame it needs to work that way but many of us SM's on this site have gone through this. Good luck.
Broken Record Technique
Yes, just repeat & do not engage in debate, justification, or otherwise responding in any way.
If he keeps giving in, she's
If he keeps giving in, she's going to keep doing it. He has to say, "No," then just ignore.
For these bio mums, cs
Is their income, its never seen as solely for the kid. Its their income to never get a job but rather freeload off the hardwork of the ex. Thats the price a man must pay for the privilege of using her vagina and impregnating her and the 10month accommodation she provided for the child during pregnancy
so when women claim equality and to be treated like men, some who are these bio mums still expect to not work like men and just freeload, doesn’t matter kid(s) are in fulltime schooling
Sickening
I see so many BM's do this type of stuff. It literally makes me fume. I left my 1st husband and did not get a penny for 14 years and still do not get a penny for those kids. I agreed to drop CS as long as I got sole custody, he agrees willingly. He voluntarily signed off his rights to the kids. I believe my kids are worth more than any amount of money. My ex-bf thougj kept getting more and more sh*t from his BM. She actually had her daughter ask him for $500.00 to give to her. Why are some women so Low?
Same here
no CS yet I totally complied with visitation at my expense.
I feel your pain
Cms system in England is royally screwed in favour of the mother
its the same
in the US and Canada. And then they wonder why the Western birth rates are so low. Girhippo was ths same; always trying to guilt Chef into paying more. She used the skids as wallet miners and had them ask for stuff on her behalf.
It definitely is. DH's second
It definitely is a screwed up system here. DH's second wife got pregnant by someone else (one of his closest friends). It was a race to divorce her, as if they were still married after the baby was born, he would be responsible for CS even though the baby was not his. It's madness.