I paid it when DH lost his job, just to keep the drama at minimum. If she had demanded it, I don’t know if I would have, but she didn’t know he had lost his job. We also had a vested interest in keeping current due to immigration stuff, etc  

If he doesn’t pay, it just goes into arrears. She should not be relying on CS as her only income.  - No savings at all? 

I hear banks are waving their pens for 0 percent interest payday loans at furloughed workers (of course in the hopes they will pay interest when they get all their back pay and not pay the loan back right away)

By offering for the SD to live with you, you have called her bluff. Not only is SD not your kid, the bitch ex is not your problem. I'd see my DH's ex live under a bridge before I'd give her a dime or allow DH to give her any more than the amount per the marital settlement agreement. Sorry but you would be a sucker to do that. Just say no - why should one person who works hard and did everything right with regard to financial management, have to pick up the slack for some lazy POS who did not?!  I make approximately 7 times what DH's ex bitch makes due to my own hard work, discipline and excellent choices. Just because she chose to waste the masters degree DH paid for, does not mean anyone else should live with her poor choices. DON"T PAY!!

I would pay the bare minium CS that he has to pay and absolutely no extra's.

I would do this because I would not want DH to get into more trouble with not paying CS and it causing him more financial/court troubles.   And maybe come up with a plan for DH payback the savings used at a later date when can afford to.

Sorry your husband is being effected by the government shutdown.

I would not pay it. 

I have paid the ex’s alimony a couple of times when DH couldn’t swing it. It stings, for sure. But he is my partner and I feel like that is part of marriage. Good luck to you guys. 

This would be hard to pysically do just becasue of my level of hate of BM, however, I would do it. For 2 reasons:

1) I wouldn't want DH to get in any trouble or have back payments or arrearages over something he had no control over and it was no fault of his own.

2) CS is for the child. Not BM. As long as I could keep telling myself that, I think it would help. Remember that even the roof over Skids heads is for them, so you can't calculate out what goes where in BM's checking account. 

DH is working. He's not getting paid right now, but he will get paid (hopefully soon) when this madness is over. In this situation I'd lend him the money and have him repay me when the pay comes through.

If me I would pay the CS for my DH. 

There is still a valid CS order. Your Dh is still working and he will be paid in full when our 'leaders' come to their senses. Whatever you float your Dh is a short term interest free loan. Period. Regardless of how much you dislike the BM, simply offering a side deal to take the kiddo in fulltime until the shutdown is over does not wipe away your Dh's previous financial CS order. You're letting your personal feelings towards BM get in your way. 

Just as your mortgage payment, your Dh's car loan and any of his other obligations... none of it stops just because your DH is temporarily getting zip on his paycheck. I suppose it's really up to you to decide if your dislike f BM is worth having your DH go into arrears and just have to pay BM even more monthly when his money finally comes through.

In my state one can phone the office and have the payment of CS froze (short term) where the obligation continues (and with interest) but the state won't pursue legally after the non-payer at this time. 

The thing is, if he doesn't pay it, it goes into arrears. Then he may have fees and/or penaltiea he has to pay in addition to the arrears. And if him not paying pushes BM into having to get food stamps and/or any other assistance, it could look bad on your DH for not figuring out how to pay it.

Your DH has options. He could not pay and be in arrears and pay the little fee once he is paid again. He could get a payday loan (from somewhere reputable) and pay her CS. He could borrow it from you and you be the first person he pays back. He isn't without options, but none of them are going to make him feel any less embarrassed than he probably already feels.

Whether BM is a bridge troll or not, and whether she works or not, your DH has to pay CS. There is no getting around that unless BM hands over custody. Trust me, I feel your frustration over paying someone who should be able to do for themselves. When your DH isn't getting paid, it affects your household and your child, yet his other child is expected to be taken care of no matter what. It all seems so unfair, especially right now when he's working and just not getting paid.

So if this is a line in the sand for you, then draw it. I personally would lend my DH the money because, if the reverse were to happen, I'd hope he would help me out. However, I could and would not do it month after month. I'm not sure what your DH does for the government, but he may seriously have to think about quitting and going private sector if an equivalent job exists. The reality of this situation is that he needs a paycheck because he has two kids who need him, and he may have to find employment elsewhere, as much as that may suck.

If you do decide to loan him the money (yes, loan, with the stipulation that you are the first person paid back after he gets back pay), make it crystal clear that BM doesn't get another dime from EITHER of you. The Daddy ATM is closed. BM is going to have to figure it out right now because your DH can't. Keep your offer for SD to live with you open if it becomes "too much" for BM to handle. She gets CS because a court said she is owed it. Anything else is a gift, and you are in no financial position to be giving gifts to anyone.

I made a CS payment or two for my DH when he was between jobs. It was an incredibly bitter pill to swallow, but it was better than allowing it to slip into arrears and jack up our credit.

I wish courts would enforce child support equally, meaning BOTH parents need to be financially responsible for the costs of raising a child. Allowing these women to live off CS and government programs isn't benefiting the kids. They grow up like mine thinking they should be able to live it up without bothering to work for anything.

Just my two cents...

Don't look at this as money for BM. It's just another obligation your husband has to pay. Don't think about where it's going. Just pay it.

Do what's good for your marriage, your team. Him laying out more money for interest so you don't have to imagine your money going to BM costs you more. Look strictly at the dollars and cents -- what can you do to keep more money in your pocket? That's what will get you ahead.

We're all victims of politics right now. Don't make yourself a two-time victim by cutting off your nose to spite your face on this money thing.

And most of all, WHEN YOU GO TO THE POLLS NEXT TIME, remember the feeling you have right now knowing YOUR hard-earned cash is going to HIS lazy ex-wife because of politicians using us like pawns. That's where you get your revenge.

(Note I didn't tell you which politicians to blame. That's for you to decide. Just don't let this anger and humiliation go to waste when it's time to cast your vote. Let's make 'em pay.)

There are tons of women government workers who are not getting paid. Many of those are single mothers who may not even be getting CS.  They have to figure out how to survive. BM does too. It’s a horrible situation, but BM is no more special than any other person not getting their money  

He can pay her when he gets the money.  This is a whole different situation than someone just losing their job.  

This might be worth a call to a lawyer.  In my state, if a man doesn't pay his child support he can be jailed (even if he has no income with which to pay). 

A shutdown is a shutdown. Who the X voted for is irrelevent.  DH doesn't get paid... neither does BM.  If she can't feed the kid the kid can come stay with daddy where the kid can be fed.  He can catch up his CS when he gets paid at the end of the shutdown.

I don't respond well to demands or manipulation attempts.

Pay the CS.
Doing so limits the fallout to your home only.
It cuts out BM's ability to bring more drama to your home, this time with the courts and non-payment and arrears and whatever CS agency she is going to cry to.
That peace of mind is worth it.

You do find yourself in a crappy situation and I am sorry for what you and your husband are going through.
You said he diligently paid off his debt and got himself out of hole, he also always pays his CS, so he doesn't sound like a guy who will stiff you on repayment of his CS. 
Do this for your DH, help him.
You know the money is not for the gorgon, even if she abuses what is rightfully due to your stepdaughter.
Hugs!

I've always said that even if I hit the lottery and we were set for life that I would not give a dime to BM. The fact that she's being that difficult would make me not want to pay it either and thinking about being in that situation makes me upset.

I think I would leave it up to your SO. Let him know that you'd be willing to give or loan the money to him if he wanted it and let him decide. That way your offering to help him out. As much as I wouldn't want to pay CS I also wouldn't want to see SO stressed and dealing with BMs harassment any more than usual.

Here’s the thing. Stop looking at child support as anything more than a bill to be paid. If this was any other bill would you be this worked up about paying? What if it were day care or the kid’s lunch balance?

Issues with how child support is being spent aren’t about money. It’s about the parent receiving it failing to provide care. If the children aren’t being cared for, focus on changing custody not stopping child support. If you’re focus is on how the money is being used she could just as easily tell a judge she could get more. How does giving less benefit the children?

Anyways back to your issue…. Do you have to pay his child support? Legally no but it is still his obligation to pay and who it’s going to doesn’t matter. Him not paying CAN negatively impact him if there is ever a court issue. Then on the same note EVERYONE understands what’s going on right now. Everywhere I look banks, credit cards, and even large company renters are making exceptions understanding they will be paid once the money comes through.

If I were you, I wouldn't pay it. Child support is factored off of your DH's income, which is $0 right now (until he gets back pay). I think that if you pay it now, you're setting a precident and involving yourself into the child support equation. I would stay out of that if I were you. Besides, it's child SUPPORT.... to support the CHILD. If that's BM's main source of income, that's on her. Not on you and not on your husband. If they were still married, BM would have to be dealing with no income coming into the home due to the government shut down. You have NOTHING to do with it. I suggest you stay out of it, especially because your BM is high conflict. She'd end up taking you to court eventually and yes, it's going to come up that YOU paid. Forget that noise. 

Is CS paid via a state agency or is it paid directly to her from him?

What happens when the shutdown ends and he gets paid?  Will his check automatically be processed for the back child support, meaning that he will have overpaid if you pay this now?  

Before I make any moves to pay anything for him I would make sure that any overage would be refunded by the state or the government when he starts being paid again.

If you pay her now directly as there is no check for CS to be taken out of,  the CS office will then take out the CS it did not distribute.  BM will get the money twice and there will be little if anything you can do to make her give it back.  There are dozens of stories of CS offices collecting and distributing too much money.  The CS offices don't give a damn about collecting back from BM if she received too much money.

I am Australian and can not believe a government can just shut down and not pay employees.

Having said that I would pay and get DH to pay you back when he does get paid.

I vote no, do not give BM a cent. You offered arrangements to have your stepchild taken care of but all she is concerned with is the money. She should have other income as well. The child is plenty oldenough for the mom to work while the sd is in school!

Also, I was under the impression that 50/50 mean no child support. Is that not how this works? 

My attention span is too short to read all the replies, but why is your DH not filing for a reduction in Child Support due to reduction in income?  AND NO, i would never pay it.  BM needs to get a job.

I get that you can help DH and it wouldn't be a big ding to you yet this is a classic example of SM riding in on her white horse saving her DH from his self created problems.  The man paid child support before you came along, whatever would he do if you weren't there to pay it for him? Would he *gasp* have to tell BM, "Sorry, you'll have to wait until I get paid because I don't have money either."  Leave it between the two of them, do not insert yourself into this.  BM could always think about getting a job, I mean her kid is 9 and I presume in school for most of the day.  It sounds like the CSEA doesn't take it out of his check so he won't get dinged for anything, BM is just gonna have to wait.  In the meantime she can stand in the line at the food bank with all the federal employees or maybe go donate some plasma.  

Once the shutdown is lifted those who did not receive pay will be paid back wages.  DH can catch up his CS then.  If she can't feed the kid then BM needs to drop the kid off with daddy.   No income is no income.  NCPs who lose their jobs go into arrears all of the time.  This is nothing new nor is it anything special.

Fortuneately my wife was the CP and we never had to pay the SpermClan.  Though we did periodically pay for their half of visitation travel to make sure that SS could continue a relationship with that part of his family.

In the OP's case... I would not pay DH's CS. He can catch it up with the shutdown lifts.  This may provide a valuable lesson for BM to get a damned job.