How much time do you spend with this child? They may not be related to you but they are related to him. The circumstances of that child's conception should not come into the equation.

If  you are in the US, and your DH is working, his child will be entitled to social security should he die.  And SS is generally higher than SSI, assuming he is not making minimum wage.   Is there a CO in effect, some states will require him to pay for college, so he should be saving.  

My DH and I have seperate finances, but we got married at an older age.  I doubt he will be able to pay for much more than community college, and maybe local state school for his kids, but he wont leave them hanging.  

If something tragic happens and you both pass while the child is a minor, the child will receive SS benefits. Also, if your husband wants to get a life insurance policy, he can do that and leave that for the child.

My SD is not a minor anymore but BM would have gotten SS for her and that was basically it. Our finances have always been separate and DH didn't really have anything to leave her, back then. Now that she is an adult, she will inherit nothing, due to her own choices and disrespect. IF she were to inherit something, it would come from only DH's portion of our assets.

He could calculate his contributions to assets and savings and divide them how he saw fit, but you have every right to demand 100 percent of your contributions go to your child.

You have one child.  Your husband has 2.  Fairness would dictate that your husband not exclude one of his children from an inheritance but there can be a lot of facets of your situation that might need to be take into account.  One thing that you don't take into account is that he "paid child support".  He is also paying child support to your joint child by caring for him.. it's just that he doesn't send that money out of the household.

1.  Is your husband the primary or significantly better earner? if so, he might be inclined to bequeath both his children something while also leaving things to you.  Perhaps even your home (if he is the one who has bought it).. perhaps you would get the right and ability to live there as long as you wanted but when you pass... or move on.. the home would then go to his two kids to be split?

2.  He could also put money into a trust to benefit you as long as you are alive but then pass to the kids.

He absolutely should try to treat his two kids the same.. but you only need to leave things to your own child. 

As far as maintaining a relationship or visitation with his child after he passes.. no.. that isn't something you need to do

Go see a lawyer - they've seen it all and it's hard to say what is 'fair' to you and your child(ren). But life insurance is one thing you can do. And another thing you can do is have assets held in trust so you can ensure that your child(ren) get what is YOURS. 

For me, at face value - 75% to your child(ren) is fair so long as incomes are about equal and 25% to his other child. Another thing to consider is whether either of you are likely to inherit from your families. I know in my family while we wouldnt want to leave anyone out, but at the same time family inheritance should go to blood family. So while my SO is bringing practically nothing into our relationship (except income) he expects to inherit money and that should mostly go to his kids. And while I expect to inherit very little, I do bring equity which I want to go to my son. But at the same time, I do not want my partner out on the street if I were to die (and I don't want my son having ready cash before a certain age anyway).  So you need to think about housing assets, etc. 

We will not be having any more children. But you may be so that is another thing to think about. The will you write now is not the will you may need later on, but that's ok. 

They way we did it is- DH has 80% of life insurance, 401K and property to me, the other 20% divided between his 2 kids. Both BM's are peices of crap and won't provide for them if DH passes. If we both die the Skids split 80% and 20% is split from my kids. 

DH get's 100% of my life insurance, 401K etc. if I die 1st. My kids will be well provided for by their father if something happens to me and if they are minors they will get SS as well. If we both die my kids 80% and his get 20% of mine. 

We also have a trust for OSS18 since he is special needs. 

My skid will not inherit from my side of things, but will from DH's side (split equally with our children). 

I wont discuss my personal situation because that is how I am. BUT I can tell you about a very VERY wealthy family member of mine. But first, did you know that most people of wealth do NOT leave their earned money to their kids?

They expect their kids to find their own way and make their own money..

Back to my very wealthy adult family members. They have adult kids who are married.  The MOM and DAD busted their rears for  years giving them a lot of wealth and also acquired a huge amount of money that i will call old money. Their will is rather specific no inheritance for their bio kids until their bio kids are in their 60's....NO JOKE.

Lets face it give a young adult kid even in their early 30 money and POOF it wont be long before it is gone. Also a tip of my hat to my family who wrote their wills this way---it will weed out anyone who thinks they are owed buckets of money because they married into it.

I find your comment very strange that your husband will leave it up to YOU to figure out what to give to his child from a previous marriage...how awful of him. If I were you I would make sure he makes his plans now so you can follow thru. What ever his desires are. Make plans to have a will drawn up or at least ask questions.

I think your husband at a minimum needs to set up a life insurance policy that will insure that his first child is taken care of through the age of majority, whatever that is where you are located.  Beyond that, if the child is not very involved in your lives and your husband doesn't care enough about that child to have an opinion about it himself, I would leave everything else to your mutual child(ren).  It's up to him to advocate for and care for his own child.  I don't think any parent owes his or her child an inheritance; I do think parents should take steps to make sure their children will be taken care of if something happens to them while the children are still minors.

FWIW, my parents are wealthy.  What they're planning is similar to Goodluck's wealthy relative.  They're leaving everything in trust, and while my sisters and I will benefit from the income from the trust, I don't think we can touch principal until we're at least 50, and most of it will never be available to us.  So I don't have to worry about whether that principal goes to skids as I won't have a say.

What we did was after a visit to the lawyer to have the will drawn up.  If I go first, my wife gets everything of mine minis 25% that I have allocated to my daughter.  If we both go, my daughter gets  an extra 25% in comparison to SS.  I didn't leave him high and dry but it's different.  If she goes first he will still get a good chunk.  

I like the idea of a life insurance policy for the skid.  The payments come from DH's side of the budget, you don't have to deal with it, its outside of probate so you won't even have to deal with skid if you don't want to.  DH can pick the amount himself and pay for it himself and it doens't have to stand in the way of continuing to build wealth between the two of you.  

I’ve been thinking of this lately too. DH & I don’t have kids together yet, but when we do Id like to make sure all our kids (including steps) are taken care of fairly. 

Right now, if DH were to pass on I would inherit everything. I don’t have a will yet but mine would be the same. What I’d like to do for the kids is, his kids get equal shares of his assets (meaning my SS’s & any future kids we have), and my bios will get equal shares of mine. So our bios will realistically get a larger chunk of our estate in the end (after we’ve both gone) than my SS’s will, but I know the boys will be inheriting from their BM & her family as well. 

We don’t have this drafted, but an arrangement along these lines is fair in my opinion. 

I don't have any kids but bf has 3, we need to sort our wills out but when I do my half of the house and any money I have will go to my 2 youngest nephews who I am very close to and my bf half and any money he has will go to his kids. There's no way I will be leaving anything in my will to the skids. 

Our Will names each other sole heir and beneficiary.  In the event of our joint demise, it all goes into trust for SS, with the exception of a few personal items that go directly to specific individuals, until he either completes a Bachelor;s degree from an accredited institution or turns 40 whichever is first. 

Parenting from beyond the grave!