over it
I am so over my SD's behavior. I don't know what to do anymore. DH has full custody of her. So we have her all the time, her bio-mom isn't in the picture at all. The only break I get is when she goes to her grandfather's house.
I know a lot of her behavior is "b****y teenager" stuff, but I don't see why I have to always put up with it. DH works a lot, so I am the main parent. Thankfully, even though DH isn't there to see the behavior, he usually backs me up on it. But it's getting to the point of I never want her around, I don't like it when she is home, I get mad when she asks for things. She's overweight and lazy. She is self-centered. Getting her to help around the house is maddening. We took away the privledge of the Xbox and the only way she can earn it back is if she works around the house AND does something active.
I just feel like giving up sometimes and its exhausting. She is an energy vampire and the whole mood changes in the house when she is around. I don't get to relax, because if I do, then she feels like she doesn't have to do anything either.
I would never, ever, ever
I would never, ever, ever agree to be the main parent for a child that I didn't give birth to, or adopt willingly. DH needs to find another job and parent his own child the majority of the time.
I know you are going to now tell me 10 reasons why DH MUST work these long hours and avoid parenting, but I'm telling you- the solution is for you to not be stuck parenting a child that you are not responsible for.
I just assumed, if you marry
I just assumed, if you marry someone, you become the childs parent too. *unknw*
NOPE. Nope, nope. And you
NOPE. Nope, nope. And you certainly don't become the MAIN parent. A lot of men look for a woman to do the parenting for them, but it's usually not a workable situation. You can help him, but he should be doing the bulk of the parenting.
Absolutely you are her parent
Absolutely you are her parent. The operative portion of the title of Stepparent is ... PARENT. IMHO the only way to live in a marriage is to be equity life partners and that makes both partners equity parents to any children in the home regardless of kid biology.
When I realized that I wanted to spend my life with the amazing woman who is my bride of 24+ years I know I was also going to be my son's father. His mom and I met when he was 15mos old and married the week before he turned 2yo. I raised him as my own. I was as much a primary parent as my bide and far more than the SpermIdiot ever was.
So much so that when he was 22 he asked me to adopt him. We made that happen in 4 days flat. He is my son. I'm his dad.
Always has been, since he was 15mos old, and always will be.
agree, DH has to find a job
Where he’s the main person taking care of his DD. You are in a no win place. The faster you get out, the better it will be. Your DH made this child and he has to take care of it. Working, and dumping her on you is totally wrong, you know that