How cps is handling my skid situation
My sd17 has 2 kids and lives with her addict mother and their boyfriends in a disgusting nasty home that neighbors and others have called cps about. Cps is heavily involved yet again and this time their verdict is sd17 goes to Job Corp or jail because she is willingly keeping her kids in a dangerous situation. Babydaddy won't keep a job. Gskid1 goes to it's babydaddy's grandma and gskid2 stays with it's babydaddy but babydaddy can't stay at sd's mom's house. So sd is going to job corp to get her diploma and job skills and set up with a job so she can support her kids but in the meantime he whole little family will be split up. She is lucky they aren't just taking the kids...I think they should have. We'd have gotten them and she knows if we get her kids she'll no longer have any say in what happens and what we do. Job Corp is a program where you live there with few family and home visits. Sd's mom should be going to jail with all the charges against her but she hasn't had her court date yet. Cps said if sd doesn't do Job corp and babydaddy keep baby from sd mom's babydaddy goes to jail as well. She had places to go and safe places to send her kids, she just WOULDN'T do anything at all. DH is upset at what a shitty mother she is. He kept giving advice and information on ways to better her situation and we used to send child support until we realised her mom was taking most of it for pills and cigarettes and I finally blew up and now we only order groceries for her to pick up. I made her a recipe book of all my recipes and she's been using it almost everyday that they have food. I think if she hadn't been so young and living with her mom she'd have done much better for herself. Hopefully job Corp will give her that chance. I feel she probably won't get her older kid back once he's lived with his babydaddy's grandma for a year. There are pros and cons to this but it's her only option to keep custody.
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The kids sure aren't the
The kids sure aren't the lucky one's in this disaster.... I think she will be "lucky" to either kid back after all of that.
Job Corps is very strict, she
Job Corps is very strict, she'll probably get kicked out in the first week.
I don't know your situation well, but it sounds like BM is a lousy parent herself, why is he surprised that SD is?
I didn't know you could get
I didn't know you could get kicked out, I don't know much about Job Corps. I do know her only other choice is jail!
I guess like all of us we expect alot of our kids and they sometimes disappoint us. My kids are great but right now I'm watching my 23 year old make some bad choices.
Poor kids... I really feel
Poor kids... I really feel for them
CPS needs to be willing and ready to remove kids from these situations.... The kids are the ones that suffer, an adult shouldn't be given unlimited chances just because they have kids. In fact since they're indangering others, they should be hled to a higher standard.
Their mom has 4 dui from
Their mom has 4 dui from driving and wrecking being messed up on pills and the judge hasn't done anything. Dh has talked to gskids pediatrician, cps and one of the doctors ex gets pills from. They are just now starting to do anything. He said in that area if you are a mother you get away with alot. Anytime he called the police about her stabbing him or anything else she'd do, they'd laugh because he was big and ex was tiny. The last time they threatened to arrest him if he called again.
Has CPS questioned you to see
Has CPS questioned you to see IF you and dh will consider being placement option for kids?
If I may be bold....dont do it. Doesnt mean you dont care about sd or her kids. I have watched Grandparents widdle away to nothing when taking in their very young Gkids under these conditions. Bad situation. PLUS cps will dig dig and I mean dig into your financials and dig deep into private citizen life. You will be required to do much more than give the kids cookies and milk in a normal Grandparent/Grandchild dynamic.
dont get sucked in.
Saying no does NOT MAKE YOU a Bad, ugly, evil grandparent.
We had talked about going for
We had talked about going for custody but we can't afford a lawyer, plus dh has frequent seizures and I work nights and sleep during school hours so having a toddler and a 4 month old would be really difficult(there's no warning for the seizures). I'll do it in an emergency, I want them with us over foster care. Most grandparents I know who are raising grandchildren have no legal grounds, they just ended up with the kids while the parents abandoned them. But that's when they all lived in the same town, for us it would be different because we are 4 hours apart.
Well she sounds like total
Well she sounds like total trash. Those poor kids!
There's been a spate of posts
There's been a spate of posts involving teen parents/pregnancy lately, and they always make me sad.
If your SD has two children at the tender age of 17, why was she allowed to remain in her dirtbag mother's custody?? Why was she allowed to keep them? Ay yi yi, what a mess. I agree with you in hoping the gskids are permanently removed.
Cps kept getting involved and
Cps kept getting involved and not doing anything. The judge kept setting goals and deadlines and threats and the deadline would come and go and nothing would happen but more goals and deadlines and threats. SD refused to come to us and honestly it would have been hell. There's no court order for custody or anything, the kids were all in high school or graduated when he left and none of them would go with him. Then when we got married there were rules and no violence or yelling allowed in my home so sd17 stayed here for 2 weeks and decided she couldn't live here. SD22 lived with us like 9 months and decided she couldn't live with us either because she didn't like our adult child house rules.
Can you take both kids so
Can you take both kids so they can stay together?
It's DSS here and yes they
It's DSS here and yes they have no souls and they will dig into your life if your take custody, even temporary, of the kids. DW and I are going through all that right now and it's tough, we're not over the hill but we aren't spring chickens anymore either so raising an 8yo and a 2 (this saturday) yo is throughly draining, financially, emotionally, physically and every other "lly" you can think of !
It doesn't make sense to make
It doesn't make sense to make it so difficult! I guess they have their rules and regulations and if dss takes and places a child, don't you get a subsidy? Did dss take your grandkids from the parents or did you already have them when dss got involved. I can only imagine how pissed I'd be if one of my kids was such a incapable parent!! I've certainly threatened them after what I've seen lol One is gay so that's one less to worry about pregnancy.
And regarding my kids and
And regarding my kids and teen pregnancies and bad choices, I often feel this quote "There but for the grace of God go I/my kids". How many times did a child forget a bc pill for a few days and nothing happened? Or declined alcohol or a smoke, or took it and nothing happened? Sped in her dad's jag and nothing happened?