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Keeping responses in my Head.

Major Blunder's picture

Submitted by Major Blunder on Mon, 07/16/2018 - 2:40pm

Sundays are generally a chore day for us, laundry, trash, general cleaning, and getting ready for the week ahead, yesterday was no different.  GSS was in an ok mood for most of the day, GSD however was in self-centered princess mode most of the day and kept loosing privileges throughout the day.

I have been working on not responding when DW speaks about SD20 in any capacity, all my responses stay in my head, with the occasional “oh” or “ok” or the old stand by “ a huh”.

A little before noon DW says, “ I have to take SD20 to work in a ½ hour”, I don’t respond aloud , inside my head, “ Really, you HAVE to take her to work??? Or is it you are taking her to work?  Oh I forgot only you can complain about her and her needs.”

Five minutes after returning from taking SD20 to “work” DWs phone rings, wouldn’t you know SD20 needs her to come get her, too many people on the shift being sent home, off DW goes again “Having” to go get SD20.

Put GSS down for his nap and go out to weed wack the back portion of the house where I won’t wake him, come in and DW is folding a load of laundry I sit down and SD20 sticks her head out of her garbage hole of a room and askes DW if she wants to take her “Stoner Town” (some town about ½ hour away where she is going to hang out with her drug buddies). DW wife says, “ I guess I can take you when I go to the Grocery store but now I can’t go to such and such store I’ll have to  go to other such and such store” I just sit and shake my head. DW suggests that SD20 help her fold the load of laundry so they can get going, kids’ stuff and wash clothes, towels etc. SD20 carefully picks out only wash clothes and hand towels, DW askes what SD20 is digging for in the basket and she actually admits to only looking for these items and laughs about it, DW says nothing, I am fuming inside, imagining beat her face to a bloody pulp.

End of the day finally sitting down after chores and Gskids are down and DW mentions that no matter how we try we never seem to get done early on Sundays. Let’s see added an hour of driving around for SD20 to accomplish again nothing with her life, SD20 not expected to help with anything but will reap the benefits of the house, and still I remained silent, kinda proud of myself.

Comments

Areyou's picture

Submitted by Areyou on Mon, 07/16/2018 - 2:58pm

Lazy, spoiled, entitled, good for nothing 20 year old, and a mother who enables her. Sorry. 

I am sure my SD is headed in that direction.

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Mon, 07/16/2018 - 2:59pm

Wow, how DO you do it?

I know that I couldn't. My husband calls me Mouth because, well, I cannot keep my mouth shut.

You are going to explode, someday.

Major Blunder's picture

Submitted by Major Blunder on Tue, 07/17/2018 - 7:43am

I've had to work on not commenting, that was my go to for a very long time, now no matter what is said about SD20 I don't respond.  DW is always telling me something about SD20 and I say nothing, just waiting for her to catch on that I am not saying anything, that will be a fun discussion  lol

GoingWicked's picture

Submitted by GoingWicked on Mon, 07/16/2018 - 3:02pm

Now you just need to stop watching the babies.  Make mom and daughter in charge, and have them take the kids when they go drive for hours.

Major Blunder's picture

Submitted by Major Blunder on Tue, 07/17/2018 - 7:44am

The GSKIDs are not SD20's they are SD26's and at this point they still like me and listen (for the most part)

Major Blunder's picture

Submitted by Major Blunder on Tue, 07/17/2018 - 7:46am

I actually rarely drink, trying to set an example for the little ones, it didn't work for the older ones but hey second time is the charm lol

queensway's picture

Submitted by queensway on Mon, 07/16/2018 - 3:24pm

Major that is what I do. Try my best to keep my comments inside my head. It is so hard sometimes. I want to scream and jump up and down and say wake up DH this sh1t is not normal. Are these grand babies your SD's?

Major Blunder's picture

Submitted by Major Blunder on Tue, 07/17/2018 - 7:47am

The Grands are SD26's, we have temp custody right now but will have legal custody in a few months.

TX2step's picture

Submitted by TX2step on Mon, 07/16/2018 - 7:08pm

Keep my mouth shut in this amazingly disrespectful sideshow. Good greif, speak your mind and let the chips fall where they may. Don't hold back, this is stroke inducing. Yeah I'm jaded like that.

advice.only2's picture

Submitted by advice.only2 on Mon, 07/16/2018 - 9:01pm

“Wow DW you must be exhausted after today....welp guess I’ll turn in, enjoy grandskid duty.”

i hate to say it stupid is supposed to hurt and the more DW hurts maybe she will start to learn boundaries and limits.

Major Blunder's picture

Submitted by Major Blunder on Tue, 07/17/2018 - 7:52am

Funny enough, I take a sedative before bed and it gets me real loopy, if I have to get up with the baby he and I are both risking alot so usually DW does have to take overnight duties with him  lol

beebeel's picture

Submitted by beebeel on Tue, 07/17/2018 - 9:02am

I discovered something hilarious last week about the tattoo my 18 year old SS ran out and purchased. He is telling everyone it is the ancient symbol for the Viking god of knowledge and guidance. I looked it up. It means "man" and nothing more. I asked him where he found the idea. He said a video game. 

I didn't tell him or DH. I'd somehow be the bad guy because the idiot didn't seek out just a tiny bit of "knowledge and guidance" before putting a permanent moron stamp on his body.

Major Blunder's picture

Submitted by Major Blunder on Tue, 07/17/2018 - 10:18am

LMAO !!!!!!!

That's awesome !!!!!!

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Tue, 07/17/2018 - 11:46am

So what was this symbol/word? Because of course I looked it up.

AlwaysSmiling's picture

Submitted by AlwaysSmiling on Wed, 07/18/2018 - 8:42am

I certainly understand your frustration when replaying the words that your spouse has chosen. Choosing the word 'need' rather than a more appropriate word, as you pointed out- well, it changes the atmosphere of the entire situation. 

I also do this. My SO and I got into an argument this past SKID weekend due to his poor choice of words. We made plans to visit a friend who happens to live near a lake & the plan was that we would all go swimming there. But this friend got sick, so of course, this plan was cancelled. This was not going to take all day, just a couple of hours in the morning, and the plan was also to come back home to work on chores (chores that my SO & I had talked about long beforehand). SO told me "I'm going to take SD8 to (another) lake (about 2 hours away) because I promised her she could go swimming in the lake today & that one is her favorite lake, and she said she would settle for that." I was livid and responded "No- you didn't PROMISE, we made plans. And those plans didn't pan out. It's not like you are breaking a promise; plans just changed. There is a huge difference!" 

I also do not pander to children. It's unproductive and doesn't benefit the child in the long run. I feel like my SO missed a learning/teaching oppurtunity there. Disengagement has been a real sanity saver for me- looks like for you too lol.   

Major Blunder's picture

Submitted by Major Blunder on Wed, 07/18/2018 - 11:06am

Syntax is everything when talking about Skids !  Have and need are obligations, maybe when the children in question are small and dependent once they pass 18 they should be able to handle their own lives for the most part unless they have a disability (not commenting).

As for my sanity?  That has always been in question otherwise I wouldn't be here in the first place   lol