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Text message from SD

Booboobear's picture

DH just showed me a text message from SD31: Thank you for for the Birthdady card! Thank you for the check. I am constantly amazed at your effort

 

Nice or Mean?  DH doesnt know.

ndc's picture

I would look at it in the most positive light (life is easier that way), and also be pleased that the child is polite enough to acknowledge a gift.

momjeans's picture

I take it as nice, but I’m a little hung-up in this part “I am constantly amazed at your effort”. What is he? 6? 

 

 

Booboobear's picture

She was "PAS"ed along time ago and does not return calls or texts most times.  31 years old.  She ghosted him a few years back and so he stopped calling, for two years until she called him mad and yelled at him for not calling his daughter for two years, so he went back to not having his calls and texts returned most of the time, and he sends her birthday and christmas cards.  If we are in her area, we share a meal.  

momjeans's picture

Oh goodness. I feel sorry for your DH, when it comes to being his daughters whipping post. There seems to be a lot of projecting on her part, too. Specifically that comment I pointed-out that didn’t settle right with me in reading. 

Focused_onourlife's picture

After reading your last comment, I would say passive aggressive.  With the ghosting, ignoring and chewing him out tactic, i would say she's using the punish/reward tactic. Punish you DH for not bending himself into a pretzel and chasing her and rewarding him when he does chase (consistant cards/gifts) her. She's manipuating him with mind games. If he wants to keep picking up the crumbs she throws at him, let him. At 31 y/o they should be having a two-way adult relationship. Not allowing him to PROVE to her he's worthy.

still learning's picture

"I am constantly amazed at your effort"

Um yeah okay. She should have stopped after the second sentence.  Sounds like she doesn't know how to talk to her dad without giving a backhanded compliment.  Rude, I wouldn't tell DH that though.  

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disrestep's picture

The comment SD made about constantly amazed by his effort is rude and no need for it. She could of chose to be grateful for receiving anything. Think about if you sent that message to someone, why would anyone do that except to be ungrateful. 

Lisa mckay's picture

I've seen many messages from SD32 thanking her father exclusively mostly for things I've done or she has received from both of us. She can spell my name but I don't see it. It is deliberate now.